Does anyone actually say "African-American" in everyday life?

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I do. I also say Native American instead of Indian and Asian instead of Oriental.

I can't work my way to saying "person of color" because I don't consider "white" to be essentially transparent. It's still a color.

My experiences indicates that Indians prefer their tribal identity, Cherokee or Seminole or whatever.

 

[Recidiva]

My experiences indicates that Indians prefer their tribal identity, Cherokee or Seminole or whatever.

Then I'd be happy to call them that.

I think everybody has a right to their name, in reason. If someone is "Jacques" and he would prefer it were pronounced "Zhok" then I think it's rude to call him "Jackweez" once the preference is expressed.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Then I'd be happy to call them that.

I think everybody has a right to their name, in reason. If someone is "Jacques" and he would prefer it were pronounced "Zhok" then I think it's rude to call him "Jackweez" once the preference is expressed.

And those ambiguous names like MARCIA. ITS MAR SEA UH! YOU OAF!

ITS MEEE UH! NOT MY UH!

 

[Recidiva]

And those ambiguous names like MARCIA. ITS MAR SEA UH! YOU OAF!

Right. So you meet someone, you make a guess at their name, they correct you politely, you accede politely.

I've never had a problem with it.

 

[Wings]

As a half-breed chick with a weird name I have to attempt to be understanding when people don't know how to pronounce it.

If someone specifically says "Call me Somalian" then that's what I'll call him. I mean, that's an odd name but who am I to judge?

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Right. So you meet someone, you make a guess at their name, they correct you politely, you accede politely.

I've never had a problem with it.

Youve never worked with dysfunctional asshats who collect excuses to go off.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

As a half-breed chick with a weird name I have to attempt to be understanding when people don't know how to pronounce it.

If someone specifically says "Call me Somalian" then that's what I'll call him. I mean, that's an odd name but who am I to judge?

Everyone judges, its impossible to avoid. What pisses everyone off is those of us who have the nerve to do it, too.

 

[Wings]

Everyone judges, its impossible to avoid. What pisses everyone off is those of us who have the nerve to do it, too.

I've been a "victim" I've unfortunately responded in kind. As I've matured I have figured out what is ok and what isn't. Not everyone matures.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Right. So you meet someone, you make a guess at their name, they correct you politely, you accede politely.

I've never had a problem with it.

I'm guessing that youre large and look dangerous. So maybe no one twists your tail.

 

[Recidiva]

Everyone judges, its impossible to avoid. What pisses everyone off is those of us who have the nerve to do it, too.

I don't think it's nerve. I think it's just impatience and intolerance.

Diplomacy takes more agility of mind and more inclusion of other factors rather than the instant rimshot intended to insult someone else just because you can.

I'm not saying to not judge, that's not wise. It's also not wise to telegraph what an asshole you are if it could be prevented.

 

[Recidiva]

I'm guessing that youre large and look dangerous. So maybe no one twists your tail.

No, Ulaven describes me as "schoolmarm" in demeanor and appearance. I'm not dangerous, I'm just light and easy in casual conversation and much more likely to make someone else feel at ease by saying "Oh, how silly of me, of course that's how it's pronounced, thanks, I learned something today" and I tend to defuse any offense someone might want to take.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I've been a "victim" I've unfortunately responded in kind. As I've matured I have figured out what is ok and what isn't. Not everyone matures.

I had some early life experiences that convinced me no conduct is safe from an asskicking. I mean, thats what Jesus is about....IF PERFECT CANT SAVE YOU FROM THE CROSS, FUHGEDDABOUTIT.

 

[Wings]

I had some early life experiences that convinced me no conduct is safe from an asskicking. I mean, thats what Jesus is about....IF PERFECT CANT SAVE YOU FROM THE CROSS, FUHGEDDABOUTIT.

Well I learned to just keep my mouth shut unless its going to be funny. Unfortunately the only one laughing is usually me.

 

[Recidiva]

I had some early life experiences that convinced me no conduct is safe from an asskicking. I mean, thats what Jesus is about....IF PERFECT CANT SAVE YOU FROM THE CROSS, FUHGEDDABOUTIT.

So if asskicking is not preferable, why defy games theory and ask for it every time?

Don't blame Jesus.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I don't think it's nerve. I think it's just impatience and intolerance.

Diplomacy takes more agility of mind and more inclusion of other factors rather than the instant rimshot intended to insult someone else just because you can.

I'm not saying to not judge, that's not wise. It's also not wise to telegraph what an asshole you are if it could be prevented.

What you suggest is something I call, DONT BE REAL GIVE UM A MATH PROBLEM TO SOLVE. I strive for congruency so that no one's stuck with any math to do. To me its the foundation of trust. Maybe I told you about the platter of salty muffins I ate, to make points with a cutie.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

So if asskicking is not preferable, why defy games theory and ask for it every time?

Don't blame Jesus.

Let me say it differently, THE WORST ASS KICKING I EVER GOT WAS WHEN I SAVED SOMEONES LIFE. Now! God and all His angels thought it was the right thing to do but others had a different opinion.

 

[Recidiva]

What you suggest is something I call, DONT BE REAL GIVE UM A MATH PROBLEM TO SOLVE. I strive for congruency so that no one's stuck with any math to do. To me its the foundation of trust. Maybe I told you about the platter of salty muffins I ate, to make points with a cutie.

No, I think the math problem is mine to solve and if I can do the math, I make it easier for others if at all possible. Sometimes it's not possible and the math involves the knowledge that I've established someone is unfriendly and I need to alter my tactics. But with me people are given enough rope to hang themselves first before I have to do it. This way I can identify genuinely kind people who aren't turned aggressive by having the first action from me being aggression - games theory.

I don't recall a salty muffin tale.

I'm aware that what I do can be considered manipulation, but it's my best guess. My brain spits out ten different paths I could take at each point in a conversation. Some are completely unspeakable and shouldn't be allowed out. I'm accustomed to choosing, so I make the best choice I can.

If you have a brain that only gives you one choice, then I'm terribly sorry for that. You can't help it.

 

[Recidiva]

Let me say it differently, THE WORST ASS KICKING I EVER GOT WAS WHEN I SAVED SOMEONES LIFE. Now! God and all His angels thought it was the right thing to do but others had a different opinion.

Oh, hell, I appreciate that. That's "No good deed goes unpunished" and it's true. But it's just the occasional cost of doing good deeds and not the only outcome.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

One Christmas my boss came to work, called everyone to his office, said MERRY CHRISTMAS and passed out envelopes. One of the people then abruptly burst into hysterics, screamed I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE! And fled. About an hour later her husband came in threating to kick some ass of whomever upset wifey.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Oh, hell, I appreciate that. That's "No good deed goes unpunished" and it's true. But it's just the occasional cost of doing good deeds and not the only outcome.

Discount it all you want, but you cant bank on anything being universal.

 

[Recidiva]

One Christmas my boss came to work, called everyone to his office, said MERRY CHRISTMAS and passed out envelopes. One of the people then abruptly burst into hysterics, screamed I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE! And fled. About an hour later her husband came in threating to kick some ass of whomever upset wifey.

There's plenty of evidence of cruelty, assholery and horror on the earth.

Doesn't mean that I follow their example. Means it happens and if I can, I should help defend against them and/or clean up after them and/or persuade them to stop being a cruel asshole. I think I just realized that this may be why I still talk to you and that's just what it is. Probably more manipulation. But...I won't become them.

I've been fired on Christmas myself. I've had someone told they had cancer on Christmas.

Out of curiosity, what was in the envelope, money or a pink slip...or something else?

 

[Recidiva]

Discount it all you want, but you cant bank on anything being universal.

No, but starting actions such as aggression and demeanor affect outcome. Though I'm actually a fairly scary bitch, people I've worked with for years are convinced that a swear would offend me and I'm the sweetest, nicest, most reliable person ever.

It's because I act like the person I'd like to be, not necessarily who I know I started out to be through inclination and brain chemistry. I fake it until I make it. Actions do matter over thoughts. Eventually actions become habits and thoughts die out. Well, in my case, not exactly, but they become less of a truth and more of an option.

I've chosen to judge myself on my actions, not all the bullshit the bickering parts of my brain spew out over the course of a day or a lifetime.

 

[VaticanAssassin]

Then why does the SHRM still use it in all their materials?

To be fair I have only worked for one large corporation (80,000+EES). But 5 years ago they called in all management and informed us to longer use African American. It could be because of the huge Haitian population we has in our call centers, but if you think about it it makes sense. Last time I checked Africa was not a country. So even people from the actual Continent are not technically africans..... at least that is not what it says on their passports. African American is offensive to Haitian, Dominicans, European blacks and many more.....

But this dude says it best...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zD7T5klrmRs

 

[blobfish]

To be fair I have only worked for one large corporation (80,000+EES). But 5 years ago they called in all management and informed us to longer use African American. It could be because of the huge Haitian population we has in our call centers, but if you think about it it makes sense. Last time I checked Africa was not a country. So even people from the actual Continent are not technically africans..... at least that is not what it says on their passports. African American is offensive to Haitian, Dominicans, European blacks and many more.....

But this dude says it best...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zD7T5klrmRs

Haitian blacks are just as African as the ones in America.

 

[VaticanAssassin]

Haitian blacks are just as African as the ones in America.

They do not think so.....

If you want to get technical than we all are African as it is widely accepted as the cradle of civilization....

So lets start saying..

White African
Asian African
Mexican African

What do you call a white guy from South Africa in America? By your logic he is African American as well? More so than a black person who has been here fro generations...