Do your fellow literoticans know this about you?

[Jade]

DCL's personality thread got me interested....

The whole "dominant/submissive" thingy... do you think you can guess who here is which one (I mean, we all have a little of both, but it is not generally 50/50.. more like 60/40, etc. )... which one makes up more of you? Do you think you come across here the way you really are?

I am asking b/c I have a feeling that most of you think I am some sort of dominatrix type, (probably in part b/c of my black lace picture) when really, I am only dominant (we are talking "sexually speaking" here, in case you haven't figured that out by now... how you are out of bed is another case entirely!) about 20% of the time. (hope that doesn't take away any of my "appeal!" lol).

I have my guesses about most of you... okay, ALL of you!

If you don't mind...




Submissive in bed (they like to be dominated the majority of the time):


Most the guys here
Tiggs
Cheyenne
Angelique
Whispersecret
Naked Hunny
Endlessly
Isabella Thorne
Rosebud


Dominant (they like to have the control/power the majority of the time):


Siren
Lovely Latina
April
Nicole


And the dominator people, I am not even sure of any of them.

I have not been able to develop a clear theory about this phenomenon.
I mean, do MOST people enjoy being dominated, or is it just that most people on lit. are the sexual submissive types?

Or, is it that we often associate the dominator with "the one who does all the work," and the submissive person with "the one who gets all the stuff done to them."
I think this has a lot to do with it.

I think that if people could see that both parties do the work, just in different roles, that we could all have a lot more fun.
Or maybe you all have thought of this long ago, and I am therefore rambling pointlessly.

Ah well,
Later taters!

 

[Bonnie Wee Lassie]

Good guesses but what about me? LOL

 

[Bobtoad777]

{{{{{{{{{{BONNIE WEE LASSSIE}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Your back, I missed you so, and why no emails?

 

[Bonnie Wee Lassie]

I am actually on my friends computer. I will be back on for good soon. This is just a tease.LOL

 

[KillerMuffin]

*smiles happily* Its WONDERFUL to see you again Jade dearest. A highly interesting thread as well, particularly since submission/domination sexually has been on my mind quite a bit lately.

No one, of course, will ever guess which one I generally insist, nay demand, on being.

 

[MADDOG]

KillerMuffin, you wouldn't be dominant by any chance would you?

MADDOG

 

[KillerMuffin]

Drat. Its the Muffin isn't it? It always give me away. Maybe I should change my nickname to KillerMistress? Then no one would be able to guess that I'm a control freak. Thats the ticket... lol

I have to be in control, generally the dominant partner for some reason I don't really want to get into. Its not exactly the traditional submissive/domination thing, but more of an I permit him to do these things to me. There is a balance of power in my sexual relationship, and I generally weild most of it. I should say that my StudMuffin allows this because he enjoys what he calls my "wildness in the sack." (He told his mother this, I was soooooo embarassed) He doesn't feel the least bit submissive by following my lead, or so he claims. I don't so much as give orders as its an unspoken we do what I want sort of business. But thats sub/dom isn't it?

Okay, everyone now knows I'm a self admitted control freak. Its time for all ya'll to fess up too.

 

[Aranian]

Just sort of an off topic question somewhat related to the thread:

Is there a non-sexual application to BDSM? I read in an article on the campus paper the other day that the university is recognizing a newly founded club "Cuffs" that focuses solely on BDSM.

 

[MADDOG]

What is it when you want sex to be as good as possible for your partner and you get off on seeing her get off and don't mind so much what she does for you? So maybe you ask her what she wants? Is that submissive?

MADDOG

 

[Merelan]

No, not necessarily Maddog. That is a sign of a sweet, sensitive man. A real man. Not an asshole who fucks and leaves and doesn't care.
You for sure a real man.

 

[Guest]

????

 

[MADDOG]

No, not necessarily Maddog. That is a sign of a sweet, sensitive man. A real man. Not an asshole who fucks and leaves and doesn't care.
You for sure a real man.

Thank you Merelan. That's a pretty nice thing to say. What I described is basically me. I just hope the women I'm with think about me what you do.

MADDOG

 

[Merelan]

Loveliest of Lions, you come across to me, as a sweet, gentle, kind lover. More concerned with their partner and their pleasures. This makes the best lover, in my eyes at least.

 

[Boo]

The thing about the personality test in DLC's thread was that the questions they asked you about dominance or submissiveness had to do with whether you wanted to sway people over to your way of seeing things, or, the other question, were you adamant about having things done your way. The only other question that had bearing was the good liar/bad liar quesion. (And that swung either way). Answer no, (to wanting people to see like you or take your position) your submissive, answer yes, your dominant. Not a very thorough scientific study. Although, I will say the distinction between thinkers and feelers was at least more adequately expored by the questions. Not that feelers are not thinkers and thinkers are not feelers....it dealt with initial reations. It was a fun game.....but that is what it is. Interesting to see how people come up on the Bitch or Bastard board......same website.

Boo

 

[CreamyLady]

Boo, I only came up with a 35% Bitch rating. I have to work harder, I'm afraid.

 

[Boo]

Creamy Lady:

I was less than you, and, after reading your posts, (I lurk), I know that isn't true. Some people can take standardized tests....some people can't.

Boo

 

[CreamyLady]

Does this mean I'm a lot bitchier than 35%, and don't have to work so hard?

Or does it mean that the 35% was an inflated score?

Just asking. ;-)

 

[Boo]

Don't know Creamy Lady:

I'm saying there is a margin of error in all comptuerized two answer to one question tests. But they are fun. Try taking them for your friends.....see if you come up with the same profile they get....I don't....I think I superimpose all my friends (unwittingly) to what my answers would be and they come up with my same score, profile whatever.

Boo

 

[CreamyLady]

It depends on the test, too. I've managed -- with great effort, mind you -- to skew unskewable tests, just to prove it could be done to a psych professor.

The tests at that site are silly, and fun to take. I did score 77% Slut on the Slut Test. According to my lover, he can't argue with that.

 

[April]

Anyway! Back to the original topic. LOL

Jade, you see me as dominant? I'm surprised. I'm actually what you might call a "switch", with a tendency to be submissive.

But I do enjoy telling those close to me what to do. If they don't listen, well, that's their problem. I'm usually right.

 

[Expertise]

I want to but i'm not gonna' do it on someone elses post..
.....fuckit

I'm all ears April

 

[April]

damnit, no giggling! arrgggggghhhhhhhhh

I will resist! I will not giggle, damnit! I have my pride. *sigh* It was funny, though. You'll have incoming email in the morning.

 

[Nicole]

Wow, Jade sweetie what made you think that of me???

I know someone who would Laugh their ass off if he saw that. I am submissive ... very submissive.

You see away from the bedroom I am and will be dominant ... to a point, and definantly away from my better half, never with my better half. So when I come here and I hand out the spankings that I do, I do it because deep down inside I want that to be happening to me. When we get in the bedroom (or whatever room or place we may be), I want him to take FULL control, spank me, pull my hair, slap me, tie me up, fuck me ... and I DO fight back sometimes but, that's due to the fact that I WANT to be punished in some way.

So Jade I guess I'm not what you thought after all. Sorry to disapoint anyone here. I'll try harder next time, I promise Sir/Madam, please don't take the belt to me today.

I would have to say the ones you might think are the dominant ones there are actually submissive, I would say Siren would be submissive and April I'm never sure what to make of, I think she might be submissive actually.

As for others :- Submissive

Angel
Whispersecrert
Cheyenne
Naked Hunny
Endlessly
Isabella Thorne
Bonnie Wee Lassie
Sammy Jo
*Eve*
Jade
Laurel
(I'm not naming everyone here)

Dominant :-

Hecate
Merelan
Tiggs (but she likes to play the part of Subbie, but it is her that has control).
KillerMuffin
And I would say 90% of the men here.

Hope this helped you out in some way, Glad to see you back Jade dear

 

[April]

and April I'm never sure what to make of, I think she might be submissive actually.

Thank you!!! Finally someone who understands me! LOL No, really.

 

[Nicole]

Well April Sweetie, your Hubby owns a Harley so I figured you had to have some submissiveness in you.

I don't think people here come across at all like they really want to be. I have opinions, I want to share them but, when I'm in the bedroom I want ...no NEED to be with a dominant man. If it was up to me to take control, it would be a very boring sex life indeed.

I'm sorry if I come across diffrently, but as said before we don't know each other as well as we all like to think.

Give me a good spanking and a good spanker anyday.