Do You Really Exist?

[Mrs.H]

Apologies for coming to Mrs.H's party late. But I saw this from Riles and it prompts a real question for me.

I get and understand what Riles says about the "One". The experience, the memories, the reawakening that I can love again, and yes the way it has changed me.

I also get that it can and does undermine my ability to have other relationships by always comparing what once was with what could be.

Sooooo....how do I get over it? Is it a matter of having enough time pass?

Sometimes the blowing of the ashes reveals the ember still glowing underneath.

Just having a reflective moment. Thanks Mrs.H for this thread...

You're quite welcome, it is my pleasure.

 

[Mrs.H]

Thanks for posting Mrs H- great ideas and excuse my smart-ass remarks.

#10...........under an umbrella? *sigh*

I want in the rain....... I dream of that.

Your remarks are adorable Daus!!

No wonder I have missed you!!

 

[daus42]

#10...........under an umbrella? *sigh*

I want in the rain....... I dream of that.

Your remarks are adorable Daus!!

No wonder I have missed you!!

OK- I acquiesce....but after a long spring of 40 degree rainy days its gotta be 80 degrees and my shirt comes off as well.

 

[Mrs.H]

OK- I acquiesce....but after a long spring of 40 degree rainy days its gotta be 80 degrees and my shirt comes off as well.

Well if you insist? Who am I to say no daus?

 

[arnoldlane84]

Apologies for being a bit late to the thread. I'd like to think that I exist to other ladies, it's more that I wouldn't know how to show other people what I'm all about.

As has been alluded to near the beginning, I suffer from having being hurt before (though it took four years of marriage for that to happen ) and although I feel ready to go out and meet people, I don't think I show the real me as yet.

 

[Mrs.H]

Apologies for being a bit late to the thread. I'd like to think that I exist to other ladies, it's more that I wouldn't know how to show other people what I'm all about.

As has been alluded to near the beginning, I suffer from having being hurt before (though it took four years of marriage for that to happen ) and although I feel ready to go out and meet people, I don't think I show the real me as yet.

So are you still guarded? Is that what you're saying? Because you were

so hurt, that now you are guarded? That would make sense to me.

 

[newbiebabe]

okay not to take this off track but everytime I read the title to this thread I want to answer... "Yes, I exist!"

I think I might have issues...

 

[arnoldlane84]

So are you still guarded? Is that what you're saying? Because you were

so hurt, that now you are guarded? That would make sense to me.

I'm not exactly sure what you mean by guarded?

I guess I'm trying to forget and move on... and at least learn from previous mistakes (as I know I did a lot wrong the first time around) but it's difficult when there's other parts of my life that aren't as they should be.

 

[PeteHulbert37]

-soft smile-

I think we all have stories of "One". Sometimes the fire burns hot and long and other times it smoulders out, leaving you with nothing but dust. The way I see it is you need to embrace the experience, acknowledge the positive ways that person changed you, then blow the ashes into the wind, because if I have learned anything over the years, it's that measuring all others against the "One" is an exercise in futility and completely undermines the potential of new possibilities.

This is very profound and I relate to it greatly. Posts like this one are why I find Riles to be so very fascinating, and I don't think she even knows my name.

 

[parker77]

certainly they exist.

am i one? that would be for her to decide, wouldn't it?

 

[Mrs.H]

I'm not exactly sure what you mean by guarded?

I guess I'm trying to forget and move on... and at least learn from previous mistakes (as I know I did a lot wrong the first time around) but it's difficult when there's other parts of my life that aren't as they should be.

How do I explain..........

That you're not really sharing your emotions.

Does that make sense? That you're not ready to be in the dating

scene yet so you'll shy away from it all.

Wait until all of your "other parts" are as they should be

before you start another relationship. It's so much healthier that

way.

 

[Mrs.H]

certainly they exist.

am i one, that would be for her to decide, wouldn't it?

She could decide yes.

I also think you would see yourself in the words

and know the answer however.

 

[arnoldlane84]

How do I explain..........

That you're not really sharing your emotions.

Does that make sense? That you're not ready to be in the dating

scene yet so you'll shy away from it all.

Wait until all of your "other parts" are as they should be

before you start another relationship. It's so much healthier that

way.

I think I am sharing my emotions though. I'm the sort of person to wear my heart on my sleeve. Maybe that's the problem.

I think I am ready, and I really do want to start again with somebody new, but I'm not entirely sure it's all for the right reasons. I guess I'm trying to find a way out of the life I'm currently leading

 

[Mrs.H]

okay not to take this off track but everytime I read the title to this thread I want to answer... "Yes, I exist!"

I think I might have issues...

To my dearest Princess Wiggles N Giggles,

You must fly here to prove you exsist!

NOW!

 

[Mrs.H]

I think I am sharing my emotions though. I'm the sort of person to wear my heart on my sleeve. Maybe that's the problem.

I think I am ready, and I really do want to start again with somebody new, but I'm not entirely sure it's all for the right reasons. I guess I'm trying to find a way out of the life I'm currently leading

That's my problem too!

I wear my heart on my sleeve.

Is the life you're leading that unhappy for you?

Then by all means make the changes.

Don't jump into a new relationship out of rebound though.

You know what I mean? Then it gets ugly. You could slip and call

her the other womans name, etc......... all sorts of hurt.

 

[arnoldlane84]

That's my problem too!

I wear my heart on my sleeve.

Is the life you're leading that unhappy for you?

Then by all means make the changes.

Don't jump into a new relationship out of rebound though.

You know what I mean? Then it gets ugly. You could slip and call

her the other womans name, etc......... all sorts of hurt.

I know what you mean, but the other woman is completely out of my life now - don't get me wrong, after everything that happened, I couldn't be happier that the divorce is about to be finalised.

It's more my job and current location which is the problem. I need to be nearer to my family, as I'm scared I'm going to lose somebody again.

While the job itself is pretty decent, the pay stinks, and because of the way this country is being run, that isn't likely to change. Especially in civil engineering, which is where I am right now.

I kind of know what I need to do, but it's how I go about it

 

[parker77]

dude, actually, that's my favorite poem, ever.

be careful how you share it - it's powerful stuff!

 

[sunshinegirl05]

We do exist, and this is my favorite expression of it;
the difficulty is finding that one special person to share it with...

I carry your heart with me
(I carry it in my heart)
I am never without it (anywhere I go you go, my dear;
and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling)

I fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)
I want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)

~ E.E. Cummings

beautiful poem

 

[daus42]

That's my problem too!

I wear my heart on my sleeve.

Is the life you're leading that unhappy for you?

Then by all means make the changes.

Don't jump into a new relationship out of rebound though.

You know what I mean? Then it gets ugly. You could slip and call

her the other womans name, etc......... all sorts of hurt.

Your heart on your sleeve is not a bad thing........except in poker. I think it shows a lot about your character!

 

[Mrs.H]

We do exist, and this is my favorite expression of it;
the difficulty is finding that one special person to share it with...

I carry your heart with me
(I carry it in my heart)
I am never without it (anywhere I go you go, my dear;
and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling)

I fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)
I want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)

~ E.E. Cummings

This has been a treasured poem of mine since high school.

It is so beautiful it leaves me speechless every time I read

it. Thank you Rich.

 

[Mrs.H]

dude, actually, that's my favorite poem, ever.

be careful how you share it - it's powerful stuff!

One of mine too Parker.

 

[parker77]

One of mine too Parker.

great hearts beat alike!

 

[Mrs.H]

Your heart on your sleeve is not a bad thing........except in poker. I think it shows a lot about your character!

Thank goodness I never play poker, right daus? (((hugs)))

 

[Mrs.H]

great hearts beat alike!

YOU.......... are correct!!

 

[sno_22]

We have to exist, we are, therefore we exist - we may not exist as we think we do, but we have to exist in some manner whether as someones dream, an advanced races computer simulation, or a figment of daytime imagination we do exist