Do you ever think about your old flames?

[chal13]

Way back in the 10th & 11th grades, I had a very nice steady girlfriend. I gave her a ring and we spent all our free time together. Right before the junior prom she told me that she didn't want to go steady anymore. She had met someone else, and wanted to date both of us. I was very hurt, and told her I couldn't deal with still seeing her knowing she was seeing someone else. We broke up and haven't talked or seen each other since. That was almost thrity years ago, but I must confess that sometimes I still think about her and wonder if things would have worked out if I had agreed to both of us dating others. So my question is,"Do any of you have old flames that you still think about?" If you do, please tell us why and how long it has been.

Chal

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

All the time. I stayed friends with most of them for years, and I still care about what happens to them. It used to drive me crazy to think about any of them with other men, but now that I'm older (and they're older) I can't imagine not wishing them the happiness of growing old with someone.

I saw one old flame last year. We hadn't seen each other in about 6 years. She was in town and came to a play I'd written, and we had a drink together. She told me of her upcoming wedding (to which I was to be invited, but never got an invite, so I'm thinking it didn't happen. Hmm. I should call her.)

I have to admit that we were so comfortable together, and so accustomed to each other's personalities and conversation and bodies, that kissing her would not have seemed strange. In fact, it would have seemed normal. Though neither of us would ever have contemplated such a thing, it was a nice feeling that. It showed me that closeness and intimacy can continue after a love affair. It doesn't neccessarily have to resolve itself into sex, or tension, but can evolve into something else: deep friendship, affection and respect.

 

[CreamyLady]

Not often. One I sometimes wonder about, but the rest of them are fodder for a thousand fires, and I'd not only light the matches, but devote a great deal of time to poking them.

Best not to look back.

 

[Never]

Yes.
I remember just a few hours ago I was remembering when I gave bobtoad all that grief. And let's not forget the 'anon' posters ripping and tearing mercilessly into other's posts - yep, all me.
*sighs* The old flames burn not the brightest but the best.

 

[Cheri]

Remember Maggy on Northern Exposure? I loved how all of her old flames died, unfortunately in her case they died before they broke up. I think I'd like my old love affairs to have died soon after our break up, and then I, like her, could make little wax skeletons of them to place on a commemorative shelf.

I do think about my crushes and infatuations of past. I wonder if Seth still uses that '65 Mustang convertable to impress girls like it did me? Would Jon be surprised at how far I can throw a football (in a nice tight spiral too)? Does Mike still turn out the lights and play Billy Joel songs on his piano, belting out the lyrics by heart?

Thanks for bringing back good memories, Chal.

 

[KillerMuffin]

"Can't help but think about what might have been
That was then and we have taken different roads,
We can't go back again
Theres no use givin in
Now we'll never know.... what might have been."

Love that song...

Yes, I think about my old flames all the time. I had a habit of tying them things and having my wicked way with them. I still have the truck, and everytime I was the bed... wow. I miss some of them alot. If Laurel ever publishes my stuff, and they surf by, I wonder if they'll see themselves...

 

[Guest]

A thousand fires?

Not often. One I sometimes wonder about, but the rest of them are fodder for a thousand fires, and I'd not only light the matches, but devote a great deal of time to poking them.

No wonder you don't want to look back CL, a thousand fires, a thousand men? It would take days to reminisce.

Just kidding, you sound so serious maybe I shouldn't poke at you.

I have fond memories from my past relationships. I hope they are all healthy and happy.

Just out of curiosity I would like to know how their lives turned out.

 

[Juliangel]

Yes, I have great memories of my past loves and do think of them. I have always wondered if I would know them if I pasted them on the street, it has been almost 16 years since my first. It is amazing I always think of him as that tall, dark haired, well built teen at my grandmas pool but he is in his 30's now just like me. He had the most amazing smile and gorgeous blue eyes, I would just melt into them. Anyway back to reality and yes I do think of them.

 

[Siren]

Yes, I remember fondly and often.

 

[Gingersnap]

NO NO NO NOPE AND NO. A couple are still friends so still in my life.

 

[Silverlily]

Oh yeah, sure. About as long as it takes me to get them in the cross-hairs.

Except for one, a drummer I dated just before I joined the Air Force. He was 6'2" and tan with long blonde hair and green eyes. He was a roofer during the day and unbelievably cut. The relationship was mostly no-strings sex, but he was just an all around nice guy. Him, I wouldn't shoot.

 

[Whispersecret]

Yes. At my recent 20 year high school reunion, I saw an old flame. It was nice to see him. He looked good. He was happily married with a toddler.

But, mostly I felt icky, because remembering being with him brought back all that pubescent uncertainty, the fear that I was nerdy/unattractive/unpopular, the feelings of being an outsider. I could live without reliving that shit.

Another flame I think about from time to time, wasn't really a flame. He was more like a spark. Until I die, I will always wonder what might have happened if I had slept with him.

 

[Carl East]

All the time, but they probably never give me a second thought.

Carl.

 

[Nicole]

I haven't been in that many realationships really.

I remember the first because he took my virginity. The second I have a son with so I have to remember him really (LOL).

But no not really. I have to say though that the relationship I am currently in will be remembered until the day I die. He is a wonderful, terrific, amazing Human being, that makes you feel alive everyday. I think you would gladly remember someone like that.

Love you babe xxx

 

[FlyByNyte]

I always think of my old flames... a couple in particular actually...I will stop at that though.

Oh, and those aren't the methane kinds...we don't need to go there!

 

[Xander]

Sure. Sometimes I do.

Though I seriously doubt any of them will remember me.....ah well.

 

[coolchick]

Absolutely! I've never had a relationship that ended badly, so I'd say I'm still on friendly terms with all my old flames. I had always held a special place for my 'first love' (who by the way got the gift of my virginity) and he tracked me down after about 15 years. By coincidence, we were both newly separated and living at opposite ends of the state. I invited, and he flew in for the weekend. It was fun catching up, reliving a little passion, but in the end I knew it wouldn't work out as a relationship. But it did help get him out of my system. I'd do the same with almost any of my old flames.

 

[Bushido71XS]

Sometimes I do then mostly I wake up from the nightmares.

 

[OUTSIDER]

The unexamined life is truly not worth living.

Yes with much regret at missed chances.

 

[wolfie69]

the thought is there

I have to say "YES". There are two women who I had relationships with, one for three years, the other for a year. I must say at first they were on my mind out of anger. (I could not have what I wanted) Eventually, the thoughts turned to fond rememberance. As DCL said, now the wish is for them to have a happy life!

 

[Guest]

think?? I dream!!!

 

[Expertise]

hmmmm....

Nahhh i'm smarter than what i'm reading in to that.... sorry.

 

[Guest]

 

[Expertise]

Forget I said anything

No that would be for the "embarassing things" thread if i let it out.

Have a good night.

 

[Guest]

don't leave me hanging!!!!