Do people who know you know you write?

sillypanda

Really Experienced
Joined
Jan 24, 2011
Posts
229
This is really just a recent curiosity of mine...

No one who knows me knows I've started writing on here, and honestly, most people wouldn't believe me anyway.

However, I'm considering sharing some stories I'm working on with a friend for feedback, since I really respect his opinion and I think he'd be a huge help.

The problems are...

1) I wrote about him (eep!),

2) I don't want to make him uncomfortable, and

3) I like the idea of total anonymity so I'm free to write whatever I want without fear of judgment (by those who know me, that is ;)).

So I'd like to hear from some of you - do you keep your Lit life separate from the rest of your life, are you loud and proud about your writings, or do you let a few people in on the secret?

Thanks in advance for your input!

Aly
 
This is really just a recent curiosity of mine...

No one who knows me knows I've started writing on here, and honestly, most people wouldn't believe me anyway.

However, I'm considering sharing some stories I'm working on with a friend for feedback, since I really respect his opinion and I think he'd be a huge help.

The problems are...

1) I wrote about him (eep!),

2) I don't want to make him uncomfortable, and

3) I like the idea of total anonymity so I'm free to write whatever I want without fear of judgment (by those who know me, that is ;)).

So I'd like to hear from some of you - do you keep your Lit life separate from the rest of your life, are you loud and proud about your writings, or do you let a few people in on the secret?

Thanks in advance for your input!

Aly

Nobody knows I exist, so the question is moot.
 
People know I write stories and post them...just not the stories I write and post here. ;)
 
I dont give a shit what people know; they always assume the worst anyway.
 
The circle of people who know I write erotica seems to expand every year. As I get older (I'm 39 and been doing this for over 10 years), I care less what people think. Close friends know, I am sure they have told some people. Family members know. A good friend of my serves as an editor. And a female friend has served as the inspiration for several works, almost all of which she's read. I think she kind of likes it, sees it as a fun thing. But I am careful to make sure people in my professional life don't find out, as they are conservative GOP types.

It has been problamatic in my dating life. When I do tell the women I date, most of them don't know what to make of it. Some think it's cool at first, and then seem to overthink it. It's fiction, people. I'm not looking to do all the things I write about! Anyway, when I meet a woman who is not intimidated by it, she'll be the right one for me.
 
I was embarassed about it at first. Don't know why, but I was. Once I got a few stories published outside of Lit (for money, even the small amount that I make) I wasn't so embarrassed any more. Most of my friends support me, but don't read erotica. Most of my family knows and they have no issues with it.

Most of my co-workers know and a few have read my stuff. They love it. They think it's cool to know a "published author" personally. I know I'll never be famous, but it's kinda cool to know that people who I know enjoy what I write.

I've taken a few of my print books into one of the local used book stores here and I've even had a few people who've bought those books contact me because they know someone who knows me.

When I first told people about my writing, they'd tease me about writing smut. Of course, I told them they wouldn't be laughing when I start cashing the royalty checks...and they pretty much don't now. Sure, I'm far from getting rich off my royalties, but it's fun making money off a hobby.
 
I have admitted to almost everyone I know that I write smut stories. I really don't feel ashamed about it.
 
I told all my friends I write Erotica. They read the stories I have out and it was the subject matter that made them look at me strange. A few co-workers I know, enjoy reading stories on Lit and are impressed enough with my current story, that I'm hounded to let them know future chapters before they come out.
 
This is really just a recent curiosity of mine...

No one who knows me knows I've started writing on here, and honestly, most people wouldn't believe me anyway.

However, I'm considering sharing some stories I'm working on with a friend for feedback, since I really respect his opinion and I think he'd be a huge help.

The problems are...

1) I wrote about him (eep!),

2) I don't want to make him uncomfortable, and

3) I like the idea of total anonymity so I'm free to write whatever I want without fear of judgment (by those who know me, that is ;)).

So I'd like to hear from some of you - do you keep your Lit life separate from the rest of your life, are you loud and proud about your writings, or do you let a few people in on the secret?

Thanks in advance for your input!

Aly


There are a few people who know I "write" because sometimes in work I'll work on some edits on my computer at lunch, and a couple of friends know I write erotica. When asked what my stories are about that's when I get a little vague because I am writing an incest series. I have a couple of BDSM things written as well and a couple are kind of vanilla so if pushed I'll mention them. I learned the hard way about the incest subject when a fairly close friend really pushed me about my work even giving me the "we've known each other since high school" line. I'd had a few and figured why not. As I started to explain the story I began to get passionate about it (as I and anyone who writes should be a bout their work) and was going on and on about the plat, the characters their history. Rambled for a good fifteen minutes and when I slowed up he looked at me and said "They're brother and sister? Christ man that's sick" so yeah not so much these days. I also have religious parents and teenage daughters so I am pretty mum right now.
 
My close family know, though they don't read any of the erotic stuff, just the other things I write.

A few folk at work know.

A pretty reasonable circle of friends on Facebook know too, as I post links in my notes tab on there in my real-name account.

If it embarrasses someone, I won't rub it in their face. If it offends them, I'll tell them not to look. If it still offends them just by its existance, they can take a hike.
 
Absolutely Closeted

But as my stories aren't all that good, it's a small loss.
 
Nobody knows I write on here, and I sure hope nobody finds out! hahah. My stories are based on real people, so it would suck if any of them knew I was writing erotic fantasies about them... especially people of a professional nature... it would be a little awkward.
 
Nobody knows I write on here, and I sure hope nobody finds out! hahah. My stories are based on real people, so it would suck if any of them knew I was writing erotic fantasies about them... especially people of a professional nature... it would be a little awkward.

That would make a difference, yes. No characters in any of my stories are based on anyone real, even in part. All simply products of my fevered imaginings!
 
Nobody knows I write on here, and I sure hope nobody finds out! hahah. My stories are based on real people, so it would suck if any of them knew I was writing erotic fantasies about them... especially people of a professional nature... it would be a little awkward.

I have similar concerns...

The guy and I have been friends for ages, and we live far enough apart that it's obviously no immediate threat... and I think he'd be flattered, maybe even enjoy reading it, but at the same time it seems like an awfully big risk to take. I'd hate to make him uncomfortable or do anything to negatively impact our friendship. :/

Hmm, maybe toiling in anonymity is best! xD
 
At my age it doesn't really matter very much who knows I write erotica. I get some weird looks from some people and some down the nose looks from others. The latter make me laugh. I've been thinking about making up some business cards for the ones that ask questions on where and under what name.

My mainstream writing is kept completely separate form this identity and from my real identity. It is all handled under a pen name.
 
And geez, how rude am I??? xD

I apologize - thank you all very much for your answers, input and feedback! I really appreciate it! :*
 
People know I write and what I write. My daughter has an account on Lit and posted right along with me for months. My son and ex have the link. I don't make it the first topic in a conversation, but I don't keep it secret. I hid parts of who I was most of my life. Now I refuse to hide anymore. But I don't write much erotica anymore and people tend to accept romance easier than erotica.
 
You asked a very good question, because I struggled with whether or not to let my friends know about my "Lit" persona. After writing on here for a year, there are a handful of my friends who know I post stories on Lit. My husband reads all of my stories before I submit them; otherwise no one in my family is aware of my online persona. Like others here, because of my real-life profession, I have to be extremely discreet about who knows about my writing hobby! If I'm going to have a dirty little secret, this one seems to be the best one going!
 
People who know me know I write. The vast majority don't know I write erotica. For me, it could be a severely career-limiting move, so I made the choice not to discuss it in person or on social networks like Facebook.
 
Everyone who knows me reasonably well knows I write erotica. I don't have secrets. I learnt that having a secret is giving something too much power. i did once have a big one and when it got out it totally my life, much worse than if I had owned up to it in the first place. I am a pretty outrageous and out there person. No one is surprised. I'm one of those chicks who oozes sex.
 
Everyone who knows me reasonably well knows I write erotica. I don't have secrets. I learnt that having a secret is giving something too much power. i did once have a big one and when it got out it totally my life, much worse than if I had owned up to it in the first place. I am a pretty outrageous and out there person. No one is surprised. I'm one of those chicks who oozes sex.

I wish I knew one of those chicks who oozes sex. That sure must be handier than leaving a trail of breadcrumbs in case you forget where you parked your car at the mall.
 
I wish I knew one of those chicks who oozes sex. That sure must be handier than leaving a trail of breadcrumbs in case you forget where you parked your car at the mall.

The guys seemed to find me easy enough when I was younger...maybe they followed the trail.:D;)
 
I keep it a secret. I once broached the subject with a good friend who I was rooming with for a couple of months while we were on an extended business trip when he asked why I was always staying-up late writing. When I told him what I was doing he looked at me like I told him I was raised on the moon. We never spoke of it again.

Another reason I keep it quiet is because most of my stories are based on actual people I know/knew (the names have been changed to protect the innocent) and situations which I've actually actually found myself in (though with a healthy bit of fiction added to make them dirtier and more interesting).

I have considered co-writing a story or series of stories with my wife. Time will tell if we ever do that or not.
 
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