Do parents get cooler?

[lucky-E-leven]

Do parents get cooler as they get older? My Mom is staying with me for the next four days and I realized tonight that she is really quite neato.

It seems like the older I get, the more hip she is and I'm wondering if it's that she's more laid back now or if it's that I'm only finally realizing how cool she is.

She's a writer as well and has been helping me with a non-erotic novel, and when I mentioned I was writing short stories for a neat little website she got all excited and interested. I figured, What the hell? and took the plunge.

"Well Mom, it's a free site for erotic short stories."

"Porn?" She asks, incredulously.

I laugh. "Well that's a common debate on one of the discussion forums and has yet to be decided. I'm going with erotica."

She understood immediately and rephrased. Then before I knew it, all the beans had been spilled and she seemed more amused than anything to find out what I'd been up to. I suppose I wouldn't have told her if I thought she'd lose her mind, but was still stunned that she was so easy going about it.

And more and more, I find myself confessing to little teenage sins and wrong-doings that I figured I'd be taking to my grave. But with each little admission she laughs and nods as though she knew all along, which OF COURSE, she didn't. But it's nice to feel absolution for those little things that have been nagging at me over the years.

Who'd a thunk it?

~lucky

p.s. I'm loading her up on bloody mary's tonight so if anyone has any little secrets they'd like to unload just let me know and I'm sure my Mom would be happy to smile and giggle for you too.

 

[fille]

Hey, my mom is a very cool old lady! I, on the other hand, get less cool by the minute. At least as my children see it.

 

[McKenna]

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[lucky-E-leven]

Hey, my mom is a very cool old lady! I, on the other hand, get less cool by the minute. At least as my children see it.

Well how old are they? My brother and sisters and I would all have said the same thing about her during adolescent years. But now it's like we're friends with the fringe benefit of a lifetime of knowing each other and having been through the same stuff.

My daughter's two and right now I'm ULTRA COOL. So I guess it's like an upside down bell curve. At least, I hope it is.

~lucky

 

[CharleyH]

I only read your first line - yep they do - as soon as you do.

 

[lucky-E-leven]

Sadly, not always.

Rather than sound like an ungrateful child, I'll leave it at that.

You, Lucky, however, are truly "lucky." Enjoy your visit with your mom!

Sorry Mack!

My Mom sends hugs and 's.

~lucky

 

[fille]

Well how old are they? My brother and sisters and I would all have said the same thing about her during adolescent years. But now it's like we're friends with the fringe benefit of a lifetime of knowing each other and having been through the same stuff.

My daughter's two and right now I'm ULTRA COOL. So I guess it's like an upside down bell curve. At least, I hope it is.

~lucky

Well, it's actually only the older one (7) who has recently started rolling her eyes at me occasionally and saying "oh, mo-om!" in an exasperated tone. With her, I'm alternately the best mommy in the world and a complete embarassment.

I think you're right about the bell curve. We go way down, but later we get to come back up again.

 

[McKenna]

.

 

[lucky-E-leven]

Well, it's actually only the older one (7) who has recently started rolling her eyes at me occasionally and saying "oh, mo-om!" in an exasperated tone. With her, I'm alternately the best mommy in the world and a complete embarassment.

I think you're right about the bell curve. We go way down, but later we get to come back up again.

I dread the day I become the bane of her existence, but my Mom made it through and so shall I. I'm hoping if we ever fall into that embarrassment slump that I'll be able to chill and we'll rise again.

p.s. You'll be mega cool if she ever finds out you write erotica! At least you'll be mega cool with her friends and boyfriends. (This song springs to mind: Stacy's mom has got it goin' on...)

~lucky




Mack...I think she'd be delighted to adopt you. And the cool thing is, you've already missed her craziness. You get to hop in while she's being cool. And a girl can never have too many sisters.

~lucky

p.s. I pray she doesn't ask for my handle and want to read any of my stories. The shell of what I do here is fine, but for her to read detailed accounts would be like me videotaping her naked escapades and I doubt I'm the only one who thinks that is just GROSS!

 

[SlickTony]

I know my mother well enough to be pretty sure that she would never accept the stuff I write--hell, she thinks the Cosmo covers are pornographic. OTOH, some of my daughters friends have thought I was pretty cool.

 

[Guest]

My sons (25 and 29) both think I'm cool. Their friends are always asking if I'll adopt them. They do not think their dad is cool (I knew they'd figure that out eventually, so I let them do it on their own, gawd what patience I had ).

My mother never got me, or wanted to, so I've had great surrogate moms all my life. She was cool to everyone else though. Having been raised in Mexico, Catholic, strict, etc., when my sons were young (9 and 12) she insisted they accompany her to church on Sundays. Mostly they hated it, but once she took them to Mass, then to a birthday party for a nun, and then to the Gay Freedom Day parade!

Perdita

 

[kellycummings]

I don't think my parents have gotten cooler, just more accepting. As a child they want to protect and advise and all that. As an adult they see me and my siblings in a different way and are more understanding of what we do and how we choose to live our lives. My mom has always been the typical mother but is also the old lady who admits she'd like to try smoking pot someday. My dad has always been strict and clean cut but is the guy who goes on fantastic vacations to exotic locales. Maybe I look at them as cool now but I don't think they've changed at all. I think I have.

 

[McKenna]

.

 

[Edward Teach]

Do parents get cooler as they get older? My Mom is staying with me for the next four days and I realized tonight that she is really quite neato.

It seems like the older I get, the more hip she is and I'm wondering if it's that she's more laid back now or if it's that I'm only finally realizing how cool she is.

Lucky, I'd lay odds that your mom has always been way cool.

Mine isn't with us any more, but once, when she was about 65 or so, she almost caused me to have a stroke when she asked me to get her some pot. The older I got, the cooler she got. I have a feeling you are going to find your mom does the same.

Ed

Ps. Hell, it's possible she's someone here on the AH and doesn't want to break it to you just yet.

 

[Weird Harold]

p.s. I pray she doesn't ask for my handle and want to read any of my stories. The shell of what I do here is fine, but for her to read detailed accounts would be like me videotaping her naked escapades and I doubt I'm the only one who thinks that is just GROSS!

My Mom just turned 80 last month and she's pretty cool.

She not only knows about Literotica she has an autographed copy of the Literotica Book, so she not only nows I have stories here, she knows which ones and one of my two usernames. (It's not difficult to connect me to the other one because both use the same avatar.)

Now, Big Sisters on the other hand get more prudish and uptight as they get older in my experience. I'd never voluntarily tell my sister about Literotica because she'd likely have a heart attack on the spot. (I won't deny my particpation if she finds out, but I won't bring it up.)

 

[lucky-E-leven]

Re: Re: Do parents get cooler?

Ps. Hell, it's possible she's someone here on the AH and doesn't want to break it to you just yet.

My mom's an original Hippie, god bless her, and would likely ask me for pot before she posted here. She hasn't published any of her 6 novels (Sci-Fi/Romance: if you can imagine) but I have it on good authority from my sister, who snooped, that hers is fairly tame...but more graphic than any of her children would care for.

I think she's always been cool, but the older I get and the more established I am, I think she's willing to tilt her hand a little more and let me in on the fun stuff.

~lucky

Just in Case: Mom, if you really are here, that strap-on scene was written entirely from imagination

 

[lucky-E-leven]

My Mom just turned 80 last month and she's pretty cool.

She not only knows about Literotica she has an autographed copy of the Literotica Book, so she not only nows I have stories here, she knows which ones and one of my two usernames. (It's not difficult to connect me to the other one because both use the same avatar.)

Now, Big Sisters on the other hand get more prudish and uptight as they get older in my experience. I'd never voluntarily tell my sister about Literotica because she'd likely have a heart attack on the spot. (I won't deny my particpation if she finds out, but I won't bring it up.)

WAY COOL, WH! Your mom sounds awesome!

I'd just rather keep my smut to myself. My hubby doesn't even know and I rather like that it's the one thing in the house that's just mine. The other day I found my daughter running around with one of my bras around her neck and a pair of my sexy panties on her head. WTF? Nothing is sacred around here, but my porn is untouchable.

~lucky

 

[The-oldmans-wife]

I would like to put in an old mothers observation about parernts.

They too were teen agers once! They may not have had the rock bands, mosh-pits, or other open sexuality that is todays norm.

But they did have bootleg booze, tin lizzes, etc..

 

[shereads]

I don't think parents change as much as children's perceptions change; that, plus the likelihood that your mother is willing to be open with you in ways she didn't when you were too young to understand her. I'm divorced and just out of a long-term relatonship, yet my mom didn't mention sex to me until about a year ago, when she suddenly wanted to have "girl talk." I'd been 'mothering' her through an illness, and for the first time - now in her 70's - she seemed to see us as equals who didn't have to hide things from each other.

If she only knew.

She wouldn't have needed a pacemaker to get her heart to speed up.



Teenagers are famously unable to see their parents as cool, and it only gets worse if the parent tries to be cool. I think it was Dennis Miller who said that all teenagers, if they could have their way, would tell their friends they were raised by wolves in the wild and didn't have any parents.

One of the coolest women I know, a divorced mom, used to spend her non-mom time club-hopping in South Beach. She was in her late thirties but looked much younger, was in great shape, could wear stretch minis and look like a model, knew the clubs so well that the bouncers would let her in under the rope with her friends, no questions asked, just about anyplace she wanted to go. Still, when she was in mom-mode, she was careful not to embarrass her girls by dressing too young or too old or too anything. Ann Taylor suits. Subtle make-up. An entirely presentable mom, right?

Wrong.

Her pre-teenaged daughter was appalled when her mom wanted to meet her new friends at a new school. "No! They'll think you're trying to be cool!"

The mom called me that night, half-laughing and half-crying and said, "I'm not cool anymore...I've been seen through the eyes of a teenager, and exposed as a fraud."

It takes an adult to see what really may have been there all along.

 

[Guest]

Hello to The-oldmans-wife

How nice to find a woman your age here. Welcome! There are only a few people here around my age. Please stick around, I am presuming you will have much of interest for us.

Perdita

 

[The_old_man]

About all I can add ti my wife's comments is; My parents were always cool, they maintained an openly loving relationship, didn't freekout when I accidentally walked in on them while they were "occupied", also had no nudity hangups.

In my early teens I figured that their March wedding and my September birthday, age and anniversary equal, meant that I had been a member of the wedding. When I asked about it, Dad admitted that I was the result of a rather inebriated New Year's Eve party.

So ... all you younger people should realize that you wouldn't be here if your parents weren't 'COOL.'

PS. If you have problems believing me ... read my wife's stories here.

 

[lucky-E-leven]

I don't think parents change as much as children's perceptions change

"I've been seen through the eyes of a teenager, and exposed as a fraud."

It takes an adult to see what really may have been there all along.

In most cases I think this probably applies, but I've always known my Mom was cool. Even when we didn't see eye to eye, I knew she was doing her job and that it was my job to be obstinate. I just never imagined she'd admit to knowing that I knew. (if that makes any sense) She's still a little in the closet with my other sisters and brother and I feel like laughing when they call me and whine about how badly she misunderstands them. Mostly because she's already called me to laugh about how well she understands them and how little they realize it.

I'm sitting here in the dark, typing as quietly as possible, while she snores softly on the couch (a few feet away), having fallen asleep during late night television...thinking how fucking awesome she really is and damn I hope I'm able to find a really great way to let her know it.

~lucky (in so many ways it's criminal)

 

[shereads]

In most cases I think this probably applies, but I've always known my Mom was cool. Even when we didn't see eye to eye, I knew she was doing her job and that it was my job to be obstinate. I just never imagined she'd admit to knowing that I knew. (if that makes any sense) She's still a little in the closet with my other sisters and brother and I feel like laughing when they call me and whine about how badly she misunderstands them. Mostly because she's already called me to laugh about how well she understands them and how little they realize it.

I'm sitting here in the dark, typing as quietly as possible, while she snores softly on the couch (a few feet away), having fallen asleep during late night television...thinking how fucking awesome she really is and damn I hope I'm able to find a really great way to let her know it.

~lucky (in so many ways it's criminal)

Just tell her that you've been trying to think of ways to let her know how awesome she is. She'll remember that for the rest of her life.

Good for you.

Btw, I met someone in another forum who came from a fundamentalist religoius background of the most strict and repressive kind - father was a preacher, mom was quietly dutiful but miserable - the whole works. Recently, this woman became closer to her mother, who's been a widow for about a decade. Mom admitted that she, um, writes...stories. Not nice ones.

"Mom, you write erotica?"

"Well, no! I wouldn't call them erotic...But they have sex in them."

Heeehee.

How little we know about the people we know best.

 

[snooper]

When I was sixteen I thought my father was an idiot. When I was twenty-one I was amazed how much he had grown up and how much he had learned in the last five years.

 

[NoJo]

Do parents get cooler as they get older? My Mom is staying with me for the next four days and I realized tonight that she is really quite neato.

It seems like the older I get, the more hip she is and I'm wondering if it's that she's more laid back now or if it's that I'm only finally realizing how cool she is.

She's a writer as well and has been helping me with a non-erotic novel, and when I mentioned I was writing short stories for a neat little website she got all excited and interested. I figured, What the hell? and took the plunge.

"Well Mom, it's a free site for erotic short stories."

"Porn?" She asks, incredulously.

I laugh. "Well that's a common debate on one of the discussion forums and has yet to be decided. I'm going with erotica."

She understood immediately and rephrased. Then before I knew it, all the beans had been spilled and she seemed more amused than anything to find out what I'd been up to. I suppose I wouldn't have told her if I thought she'd lose her mind, but was still stunned that she was so easy going about it.

And more and more, I find myself confessing to little teenage sins and wrong-doings that I figured I'd be taking to my grave. But with each little admission she laughs and nods as though she knew all along, which OF COURSE, she didn't. But it's nice to feel absolution for those little things that have been nagging at me over the years.

Who'd a thunk it?

~lucky

p.s. I'm loading her up on bloody mary's tonight so if anyone has any little secrets they'd like to unload just let me know and I'm sure my Mom would be happy to smile and giggle for you too.

Lucky, I really think that's great: Most people never get that kind of affirmation from their parents. I think for a woman to get that from her mother is very strengthening, no matter what age it happens.

My parents were very cool in their way, but I never got to that kind of intimacy with them.

My kids were encouraging when I quit my job to try writing full-time, which they saw as brave rather than selfish (I'm not so sure).

The influence of parents over their children is obvious; but don't underestimate the opposite flow: children often show their parents a thing or two about how to live well.

I love the delightful multiple meanings in the saying "The child is father to the man".