seems like a shot in the dark to me. I guess I'm a dom losing hope. I did the real life scene for awhile. Going to BDSM parties... BDSM social gatherings... and never found a suitable sub there. To me it just seems like a really hard thing to find- real life or even online. I'm afraid it's mostly fantasy.
do male doms ever find female subs on here?
- Thread starter ImWrite
- Start date
little_kid
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Dec 6, 2009
- Posts
- 227
the competition is very high online, that's why.
but stay positive, and one day you'll find what you seek.
but stay positive, and one day you'll find what you seek.
CutieMouse
Meticulously Flighty
- Joined
- Apr 7, 2004
- Posts
- 8,493
Why are you limiting yourself to looking for a D/s relationship though overtly D/s channels?
Also, you joined the site six weeks ago. You're not only looking for a lover, you're looking for a very specific sort of lover. And given the variety of D/s in the world, the sort of lover who would be compatible for you is even more specific. Needle? Meet Haystack. Haystack? Needle!
Also, you joined the site six weeks ago. You're not only looking for a lover, you're looking for a very specific sort of lover. And given the variety of D/s in the world, the sort of lover who would be compatible for you is even more specific. Needle? Meet Haystack. Haystack? Needle!
rosco rathbone
1. f3e5 2. g4??
- Joined
- Aug 30, 2002
- Posts
- 42,431
Stick around, get involved in the forums, make threads, respond to threads, and establish a distinct identity for yourself without, as someone else says, the stink of desperation. This is a social gathering, not a meat market.
The meat comes later, once you've proven yourself a real person.
Welcome aboard.
The meat comes later, once you've proven yourself a real person.
Welcome aboard.
lonely_haley
Virgin
- Joined
- May 30, 2009
- Posts
- 14
I know this isn't on topic for the OP's post, but I had to say that I love the book you're reading. Virgin was absolutely fascinating!
infinity706
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2006
- Posts
- 2,886
I'm pretty sure velvet darkness even married a guy she met on this forum. It's definately possible, but you'll have to put time and effort into it.
wicked woman
from my travels
- Joined
- May 3, 2003
- Posts
- 16,022
Yes, but on here you get the added difficulty of distance. I'd suggest you continue to look locally as well.
Evil_Geoff
Equal Opportunity Sadist
- Joined
- Aug 23, 2005
- Posts
- 6,375
While I am not in a relationship with anyone I've met from Literotica, I've actually met face to face and conversed with several lovely women from Lit.
Yes, you CAN meet them.
It helps if
A: you plan an event where several Litsters can gather,
B: you do this in a relatively large city with many things to do as an alternative if the meeting and chemistry aren't so good, OR
C: are okay keeping things strictly vanilla and are ok with meeting them with friends or family along for the visit.
It's always worked for me, so far!
Yes, you CAN meet them.
It helps if
A: you plan an event where several Litsters can gather,
B: you do this in a relatively large city with many things to do as an alternative if the meeting and chemistry aren't so good, OR
C: are okay keeping things strictly vanilla and are ok with meeting them with friends or family along for the visit.
It's always worked for me, so far!
sadangel
angel Graham!!
- Joined
- Nov 30, 2008
- Posts
- 5,879
I too met my Dom here at Lit. In fact, we are getting married August 9 of this year, a little over a year 1/2 since we first started chatting on the boards. We've taken A LOT of time to get to know one another, mostly through Pm's at first, then email, then phone/webcam and 2 weeks last October when He came here to be with me. I'll be moving to Canada as soon as we can get my Visa approved. He'll be doing Spousal Sponsor and that has to be approved also. It will happen but could take up to another year.
Yes, you can meet your Dom/sub here, but you have to be willing to take it slow, get to know them. Find other means of getting to know them. Have Trust, Honesty and Communication as a bedrock to the relationship. Understand that most will be Long Distance, at least at first, if you find them here at Lit.
Good luck to the OP at finding what you are looking for. I found what I was NOT looking for. My Dom and my soon to be Husband.
Yes, you can meet your Dom/sub here, but you have to be willing to take it slow, get to know them. Find other means of getting to know them. Have Trust, Honesty and Communication as a bedrock to the relationship. Understand that most will be Long Distance, at least at first, if you find them here at Lit.
Good luck to the OP at finding what you are looking for. I found what I was NOT looking for. My Dom and my soon to be Husband.
Well thanks for all the suggestions. I'm not here specifically to find a sub... but that would be nice. I'm here trying to connect with people. Trying to establish friendships. I'm happy for those of you who have made relationships on here. I'm sure it's the exception though. If nothing works out here that's fine I have other avenues to try and get a woman's attention.
Noira
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jan 20, 2008
- Posts
- 730
That's basically what I popped in here to say. I think the hardest would be male sub looking for female dom, because even if subs seem to be a dime a dozen, and male doms almost equally so... female doms are a rarity! You could throw a stone and hit twelve female subs! It's just finding ones who aren't taken. But you'll find friends here, and if you go out with an open mind looking for friends, who knows what sort of... interesting people you'll meet.
Interestingly I meet more people editing stories than anything else.
W
where
Guest
DVS
A ghost from your dreams
- Joined
- Apr 17, 2002
- Posts
- 11,416
um...and alt?a cock thread on am pics might work
DVS
A ghost from your dreams
- Joined
- Apr 17, 2002
- Posts
- 11,416
Is there an electrical outlet near by?it's a good suggestion!
Post in threads that you have a real interest in (and a cogent comment or question to contribute): This helps to show that you're real and that you have something to bring to the table.
Something else that many people forget: Have a personal ad thread and have it linked in your profile.
Something else that many people forget: Have a personal ad thread and have it linked in your profile.
Last edited:
WriterDom
Good to the last drop
- Joined
- Jun 25, 2000
- Posts
- 20,077
It's very difficult to meet someone here with just social interaction who is
A. Available
B. Into the same things you are
C. In your geographic area
But there are female subs who lurk here and on other Lit forums who will message you on occasion. It is possible to find a ruby amongst the rocks.
Speaking as a guy here. For women all you need is a profile or name that identifies you as female and your PM box will get hit every day. It was a technique Bloved used because we were both chatting to the same girl when all the mess was going on. It was pretty funny. He didn't like me very much. My guess is they go see who is online on the main page and message girls until one replies.
CutieMouse
Meticulously Flighty
- Joined
- Apr 7, 2004
- Posts
- 8,493
Speaking as a guy here. For women all you need is a profile or name that identifies you as female and your PM box will get hit every day. It was a technique Bloved used because we were both chatting to the same girl when all the mess was going on. It was pretty funny. He didn't like me very much. My guess is they go see who is online on the main page and message girls until one replies.
Six years on the site and I still get maybe one new PM every 6 months? I might have a PM conversation with an old friend once in a blue moon, but I've never once had my PM box "hit every day". I must be doing everything wrong. LOL
Lizzie_Borden
Real & Spectacular
- Joined
- Sep 12, 2008
- Posts
- 4,157
If you have 'use invisible mode' ticked in the options section of your profile, you won't show up in the 'currently online' list, and you won't get shit tons of lame pms.
Last edited:
