Discouraged by Lack of Feedback

[MartianMallows]

I've had a story up for about 8 months now and I really haven't gotten much feedback for it. The lack of response is rather discouraging because I don't want to write just for my pleasure but everyone else's. I am in the process of writing a story that features the 'angel' from my first story Perfect http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=260402 and I want it to be really good but I don't know if Perfect is not getting votes and feedback because people don't like it or because they just don't read it because it lost amongst all the other stories. It may seem that I am fishing for compliments, maybe I am, but any constructive criticism or even your opinion on the story would be great since I don't know if I even want to continue my in progress story right now. Lack of feedback is depressing. I would also like to thank everyone in advance for taking the time to read my story even if you hate it.

 

[starrkers]

I don't think the Non-Human category is really popular (kind of like Erotic Horror, where my first story lies), it's a niche category.

I read your story. It's very short. You start with a steady build up and long description of the character, but seem to rush the ending a bit. I also noticed you changed tense from past to present partway through and some of your sentences were a bit complicated (I had to read a couple twice to get the meaning straight). Maybe you could try busting them up into smaller sentences.

Keep writing, you have good ideas and a solid basis to work from. Don't let the lack of feedback hold you back (hell, if we let that worry us, hardly anyone here would keep writing!!)

 

[suckandfuck]

only problem is pacing

When I grasped your writing style, I expected the story to be very long, or maybe even one chapter of many. You did a superb job of describing the character and were on your way to a great buildup of sexual tension. However, it then skips straight to the action instead of making us earn it. Judging from the pacing of the majority of the story, the last paragraph should have been several. If you would keep being as detailed with the end as you were in the beginning, I would expect it to be nothing less than spectacular.
The twist ending was an unexpected and interesting one, but it happens so fast we don't get a chance for it to sink in! I realize the abrupt ending after that realization is important to its effect, but it seems very rushed after what a detailed masterpiece the beginning of the story was.
I don't frequent the NonHuman category but I like your style and would definitely encourage you to write more.

 

[elfin_odalisque]

I've had a story up for about 8 months now and I really haven't gotten much feedback for it. The lack of response is rather discouraging because I don't want to write just for my pleasure but everyone else's. I am in the process of writing a story that features the 'angel' from my first story Perfect http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=260402 and I want it to be really good but I don't know if Perfect is not getting votes and feedback because people don't like it or because they just don't read it because it lost amongst all the other stories. It may seem that I am fishing for compliments, maybe I am, but any constructive criticism or even your opinion on the story would be great since I don't know if I even want to continue my in progress story right now. Lack of feedback is depressing. I would also like to thank everyone in advance for taking the time to read my story even if you hate it.

I'm going off to read it but, this really shouldn't be your first post. Authors (even NY bestsellers) have to do a bit of self-promotion.

With 60 to 70 new stories appearing each day, unless you already have a reputation, you need to generate a bit of interest. Posting here is good. Several of us will go give your story a whirl. Also, just commenting here when other authors ask for a bit of feedback usually generates a bit of interest.

Guys here are quite good. There's a camaraderie that says 'If I look at yours, you must look at mine'.

The more your 'handle' (very good, by the way) is recognized, more chance that people will click on a story of yours. See, you have just made me aware of your story.

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

What Elfin said. Good Advice.

It also helps to be a total nut job. You get noticed quickly that way

 

[elfin_odalisque]

very impressed

I'm going to give some advice as a kind of editor but, heck, you have talent - perhaps a tad raw - but you tell a good tale.

First on the mechanics. For the net, your paragraphs are a little bit long. I think this could be easily rectified if you followed the convention for showing dialogue as separate paras. Have a look in Writers' Resources or give me a shout.

I am a fan of classic short story format and yours is a little gem. I read what the others said and I see their point. You could have spent a little more time (words) fawning over Angel Adonis - making him out to be a complete demi-god. That would have given you the chance to dwell a fraction longer on the realization he was a vampire. In writing, just like TV or film, build your illusion to the height of Everest before the fall. It's a bit like the roller coaster - we love being scared.

Overall, I will be watching the new posts to catch your next story. (Put the link to your stories in your sig so it appears on every post you make - and go wallow with the egos in the Authors' Hangout. You get lots of support and advice there).

 

[mjl2010]

What Elfin said. Good Advice.

It also helps to be a total nut job. You get noticed quickly that way

What she said. Ditto.

I didn't think there were any nut jobs here.

MJL

 

[elfin_odalisque]

What she said. Ditto.

I didn't think there were any nut jobs here.

MJL

Do you know Jenny J?

 

[mjl2010]

Do you know Jenny J?

Does anyone really know her?

That was meant to be a tongue in cheek statement anyway.

I think everyone everywhere is just a little bit nuts anyway. That way I''m never the only insane person around.

 

[anonymousreader]

I think everyone everywhere is just a little bit nuts anyway.

Yep. That's the only way that the world makes any sense to me at all. Once I realized that everyone is crazy, everything makes sense: politics, why Paris Hilton is popular, why people are such shitty drivers, you name it.

 

[elfin_odalisque]

Does anyone really know her?

That was meant to be a tongue in cheek statement anyway.

I think everyone everywhere is just a little bit nuts anyway. That way I''m never the only insane person around.

Sorry, I was only having a cheap shot.

Jenny is a heart of melting treacle, wrapped in a cactus skin. She writes great stories, gives good advice and... she must have a downside.

Serious though, writing fiction, especially erotic fiction, and publishing it, is quite a soul-baring experience. Here and in the AH and the poetry board is a pretty troll-free place to expose our insecurities and beg for admiration.

Our egos need stroking.

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

Sorry, I was only having a cheap shot.

Jenny is a heart of melting treacle, wrapped in a cactus skin. She writes great stories, gives good advice and... she must have a downside.

Serious though, writing fiction, especially erotic fiction, and publishing it, is quite a soul-baring experience. Here and in the AH and the poetry board is a pretty troll-free place to expose our insecurities and beg for admiration.

Our egos need stroking.

Oooooo... I think I love you, Elfin

You are right. Writers as a group are GIGANTIC egos with legs. Unfortunately we are also driven to expose ourselves to the ridicule of the trollish unwashed that haunt Lit and other sites.

But it goes with the territory. You are correct about this forum and the AH. I live in the AH most of the time. It's a great support forum for us.

 

[MartianMallows]

I just want to thank everyone for their feedback! The criticism and comments are a big help. I will definately resume writing my next story once I have some free time. Thanks again!

 

[AsylumSeeker]

Neither is the Celebrity section. Some of my first writings invloved CSI and still have a vote of 5, but none have succeeded in exceeding the threshold of 10. And I actually researched them, too, making sure the environment was as authentic as possible.

 

[RiverCityWriter]

I see very little I can add of any substance beyond what everyone else has suggested (except for one sentence fragment a little more than halfway through the fourth paragraph that didn't quite fit the rest of your tone - again, a minor thing at best).

Your attention to detail is very good and though this isn't a category I follow, I found myself compelled to continue reading. In fact, your writing drew me all the way to the end.

As elfin and s-and-f noted, let's see how you do with a longer treatment.


Thanks for the read.

 

[Guest]

it really grabbed me by the ... neck

I join the comments of the others. I think you can put vampires on Sf/Fantasy as long as you keep it nice like this.

It is a great first story, and I really would like to see more.

Keep at it!

Maharat

 

[jomar]

I've had a story up for about 8 months now and I really haven't gotten much feedback for it. The lack of response is rather discouraging because I don't want to write just for my pleasure but everyone else's. I am in the process of writing a story that features the 'angel' from my first story Perfect http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=260402 and I want it to be really good but I don't know if Perfect is not getting votes and feedback because people don't like it or because they just don't read it because it lost amongst all the other stories. It may seem that I am fishing for compliments, maybe I am, but any constructive criticism or even your opinion on the story would be great since I don't know if I even want to continue my in progress story right now. Lack of feedback is depressing. I would also like to thank everyone in advance for taking the time to read my story even if you hate it.

Another thing they do here, if you havn't read the threads much, is hijack your thread. You got partially hijacked - it's fun!

Anyway, your story got enough good feedback to get one of those red H things. That's positive, isn't it?

 

[MartianMallows]

Oooh a red H that is nice. Thank you all who responded! I am trying to get the muse in gear to finish my next story.

 

[PAUL C]

same thing here

i must admit that voting and commenting are not amongst the members and visitors to the sites highest priorities.

perhaps they are too tired.

it can take a lot out of you.