Details for plausible BDSM scenes

[oldskoolpunk]

Few writers write about the kinky scene well. A few notes:

- There's far less public kink in the US than one might think. There are a few clubs in SF, in LA, and in NYC, after which it thins out. The number of people who might potentially go to a kinky club in SF is about 400. If you go to major fetish events in different cities, you'll see many of the same people. The scene just isn't that big.

- There's overlap between the goth community and the kinky one, but it's mostly about the outfits.

- For an amusing take on the SF scene, read "How Loathsome", the comic by Ted Naifeh. It's very funny.

- The SF scene is rather downscale. A friend of mine has tried to push more upscale events, but it's a Denny's crowd, not a four-star restaurant one. LA has a few upscale events a year. London has more than a few.

- In SF, most of the men are men, but a lot of the women are men too. Big tranny contingent. But few gay guys; they have their own scene.

- Some people are really into equipment, and show up at clubs with more road cases than some rock bands.

- Watching someone being whipped is, well, boring. It's seldom very dramatic. Typical scene at Bondage a Go Go - overweight girl strapped naked to cross, being lightly whipped. People walking by, nobody watching. Dungeon monitor standing nearby, playing Solitare on her Palm Pilot.

- It's usually the ones who shouldn't who walk around naked.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Either I am overtired or I am missing something here.

Catalina

 

[the captians wench]

- Watching someone being whipped is, well, boring. It's seldom very dramatic. Typical scene at Bondage a Go Go - overweight girl strapped naked to cross, being lightly whipped. People walking by, nobody watching. Dungeon monitor standing nearby, playing Solitare on her Palm Pilot.

You should have checked out the club the shop I worked with visited. We set up at a local goth club and did some impromptu demos. Now I admit I'm no super modle, and yes more than a bit over my "ideal" weight for my height, but the beatings I got those nights in no way could be considered light, except for maybe the fact that I was fully clothed.

I also wasn't fortunite enough to get strapped to a cross. I was told to grab the rails of a small dancing stage that was infront of me and not to move, and fuck if I was about to! 2 of the 4 times he went at me I felt my knees buckle and had to sit on the side until I could get my head back.

Lemme tell you, we drew a crowd. I really miss those days.

 

[tareacel]

[QUOTE/] Typical scene at Bondage a Go Go - overweight girl strapped naked to cross, being lightly whipped. People walking by, nobody watching. Dungeon monitor standing nearby, playing Solitare on her Palm Pilot.

- It's usually the ones who shouldn't who walk around naked.[/QUOTE]


There's a lot of problems with your post, but this is my biggest one. I'm so used to people telling me I'm ugly because of my weight that I normally don't even get upset anymore. It hurts a little, but then I let it go. But this for some reason really offended me. First off, you make it seem like overweight girls can't draw a crowd like thin ones can. You make it seem like overweight girls aren't worth the time it takes you to notice, or that the submission of someone who's not an ideal weight is somehow less attractive than that of someone who jogs 2 miles a day and eats 1000 calories a day. (both which, I actually do.) Sadly, I don't have the experience to say you're wrong, not having a Dom and never having gone to anything like you're describing. But you are the second person in a line of many I've talked to who seem to have any body prejudice when it comes to BDSM. You know, bigger women are beautiful to some, even naked. And submission is submission. Control is control. And most big girls will do everything (and sometimes more!) than some thin girls will do. It's sad that people let body size get in the way of their enjoyment, and it upsets me that you seem to think that "overweight girl + BDSM" is somehow equal to "mediocre". And if people want to walk around naked, whatever they look like, I applaud them, as long as it stays in the club that allows it. **grin** Self-confidence is sexy, and so is smooth skin, no matter how much of it there is. Hell, I gotta love a guy who's big enough that he can pick *me* up and have the girth to counterbalance and not fall over.

Oh, and you should search around some more. There are clubs in Atlanta, Chicago, Albany, Charlotte, Charleston, and even some in smaller cities...if you know what to look for. Some of them are hidden pretty well.

~tareacel

 

[Blushing Bottom]

Don't get out much do ya ...punk?

d

Few writers write about the kinky scene well. A few notes:

- There's far less public kink in the US than one might think. There are a few clubs in SF, in LA, and in NYC, after which it thins out. The number of people who might potentially go to a kinky club in SF is about 400. If you go to major fetish events in different cities, you'll see many of the same people. The scene just isn't that big.

- There's overlap between the goth community and the kinky one, but it's mostly about the outfits.

- For an amusing take on the SF scene, read "How Loathsome", the comic by Ted Naifeh. It's very funny.

- The SF scene is rather downscale. A friend of mine has tried to push more upscale events, but it's a Denny's crowd, not a four-star restaurant one. LA has a few upscale events a year. London has more than a few.

- In SF, most of the men are men, but a lot of the women are men too. Big tranny contingent. But few gay guys; they have their own scene.

- Some people are really into equipment, and show up at clubs with more road cases than some rock bands.

- Watching someone being whipped is, well, boring. It's seldom very dramatic. Typical scene at Bondage a Go Go - overweight girl strapped naked to cross, being lightly whipped. People walking by, nobody watching. Dungeon monitor standing nearby, playing Solitare on her Palm Pilot.

- It's usually the ones who shouldn't who walk around naked.

 

[chris9]

Oh, and you should search around some more. There are clubs in Atlanta, Chicago, Albany, Charlotte, Charleston, and even some in smaller cities...if you know what to look for. Some of them are hidden pretty well.

~tareacel

Those clubs probably know why they hide from the OP and if they are smart stay hidden.

 

[myinnerslut]

Few writers write about the kinky scene well. A few notes:

- There's far less public kink in the US than one might think. There are a few clubs in SF, in LA, and in NYC, after which it thins out. The number of people who might potentially go to a kinky club in SF is about 400. If you go to major fetish events in different cities, you'll see many of the same people. The scene just isn't that big.

- There's overlap between the goth community and the kinky one, but it's mostly about the outfits.

- For an amusing take on the SF scene, read "How Loathsome", the comic by Ted Naifeh. It's very funny.

- The SF scene is rather downscale. A friend of mine has tried to push more upscale events, but it's a Denny's crowd, not a four-star restaurant one. LA has a few upscale events a year. London has more than a few.

- In SF, most of the men are men, but a lot of the women are men too. Big tranny contingent. But few gay guys; they have their own scene.

- Some people are really into equipment, and show up at clubs with more road cases than some rock bands.

- Watching someone being whipped is, well, boring. It's seldom very dramatic. Typical scene at Bondage a Go Go - overweight girl strapped naked to cross, being lightly whipped. People walking by, nobody watching. Dungeon monitor standing nearby, playing Solitare on her Palm Pilot.

- It's usually the ones who shouldn't who walk around naked.

why are you posting this on a BDSM forum? where the people who would read it are, you know, INTO BDSM?!? we know that facts and figures already. why dont you read some of the discussions that happen here and then mabye youll learn what goes on too?

 

[bronntanas]

Oh, and you should search around some more. There are clubs in Atlanta, Chicago, Albany, Charlotte, Charleston, and even some in smaller cities...if you know what to look for. Some of them are hidden pretty well.

~tareacel

Please don't encourage him! We don't judgemental jaded types around our club up here.

Seriously, Punk, if you're really bugged by all this, get off your butt and get involved! Volunteer to DM and don't play solitaire. Go find a pain slut (meant in the most loving way, since I'm one, too!) who fits your physical ideal, take her to the clubs you so hate, and make the scene you want. If the functions aren't fancy pants enough for you, go take out a HUGE bank loan and do it yourself. If you're going sit on your butt and bitch (beggin' pardon for the language, ladies) most of us aren't interested.

 

[lil_slave_rose]

Few writers write about the kinky scene well. A few notes:

- There's far less public kink in the US than one might think. There are a few clubs in SF, in LA, and in NYC, after which it thins out. The number of people who might potentially go to a kinky club in SF is about 400. If you go to major fetish events in different cities, you'll see many of the same people. The scene just isn't that big.

- There's overlap between the goth community and the kinky one, but it's mostly about the outfits.

- For an amusing take on the SF scene, read "How Loathsome", the comic by Ted Naifeh. It's very funny.

- The SF scene is rather downscale. A friend of mine has tried to push more upscale events, but it's a Denny's crowd, not a four-star restaurant one. LA has a few upscale events a year. London has more than a few.

- In SF, most of the men are men, but a lot of the women are men too. Big tranny contingent. But few gay guys; they have their own scene.

- Some people are really into equipment, and show up at clubs with more road cases than some rock bands.

- Watching someone being whipped is, well, boring. It's seldom very dramatic. Typical scene at Bondage a Go Go - overweight girl strapped naked to cross, being lightly whipped. People walking by, nobody watching. Dungeon monitor standing nearby, playing Solitare on her Palm Pilot.

- It's usually the ones who shouldn't who walk around naked.

i'm lost what this thread is about? first of all..explain what you mean by 'it's usually the ones who shouldn't who walk around naked' are you saying that overweight people in the scene should not be walking around naked? if that's the case, as i believe it is and correct me if i'm wrong, but if it is, then you are shallow and mean person. just because you don't find the 'heavy' body beautiful does not mean others don't. and maybe you should stop worrying so much about one's appearance and know them as a person. *shrugs* this thread really bothered me with the comments about overweight girls and such usually, comments like this don't bother me, but for some reason it hit me wrong this time.

 

[catalina_francisco]

i'm lost what this thread is about? first of all..explain what you mean by 'it's usually the ones who shouldn't who walk around naked' are you saying that overweight people in the scene should not be walking around naked? if that's the case, as i believe it is and correct me if i'm wrong, but if it is, then you are shallow and mean person. just because you don't find the 'heavy' body beautiful does not mean others don't. and maybe you should stop worrying so much about one's appearance and know them as a person. *shrugs* this thread really bothered me with the comments about overweight girls and such usually, comments like this don't bother me, but for some reason it hit me wrong this time.

LOL, I'm glad I am not the only one still wondering what the purpose of the thread was....didn't seem to have a question, didn't seem to invite discussion, just seemed to be a statement which went nowhere. As to the overweight references, I just mark people like that up to lacking a good dose of reality and so far up their own butt they ain't got a good whiff of fresh air, or seen daylight, in years.

Catalina

 

[lil_slave_rose]

LOL, I'm glad I am not the only one still wondering what the purpose of the thread was....didn't seem to have a question, didn't seem to invite discussion, just seemed to be a statement which went nowhere. As to the overweight references, I just mark people like that up to lacking a good dose of reality and so far up their own butt they ain't got a good whiff of fresh air, or seen daylight, in years.

Catalina

oh so true..and usually that's what i chalk it up to also...but again,this time it hit me wrong...and i see he never came back to explain the point of the thread, so i'm guessing another idiot troll.....trying to stir something up

 

[MasterPhoenix]

I wonder if he has ever been to any of those clubs...

Maybe when she comes out here, I will take her to the Power Exchange in SF.

 

[SweetErika]

- There's far less public kink in the US than one might think. There are a few clubs in SF, in LA, and in NYC, after which it thins out. The number of people who might potentially go to a kinky club in SF is about 400. If you go to major fetish events in different cities, you'll see many of the same people. The scene just isn't that big.

You discredited yourself with this right here. Seattle is a smaller (and less sex-positive/kinky) city than SF, and our club's members number over 9000, amassed in just a few years. We often have 100+ per weekly event, and while there are regulars who go to most events, each party usually draws completely different crowds. The number who would "potentially go to a kinky club" is far more than those who actually do, when you factor in scheduling conflicts, lack of knowledge and just the facts of life.

Good writers get their facts and figures straight, you know.

As for the naked overweight people, I'm all for them. Some of the least attractive people (to ME) at our club are the most comfortable, kind, intelligent, generous, and just beautiful overall. The overweight (or what our society otherwise deems as "flawed") have taught me so much about being comfortable in my own skin, more accepting and open about WIITWD and everything else. I look up to them because I only *wish* I could be so comfortable with my body that I could play in the most public areas or walk around nude - hopefully I'll get there someday.

The other aspect is that everyone in our space appears accepting of diverse appearances, and so many outwardly admire curves that it's helping me (and many others) improve my self-esteem and gain new perspectives. Even my hubby, who has a great body and high self-esteem (though he's self-conscious about his psoriasis), feels better about himself there because he sees that no one's perfect and that's okay.

We, as a society, are not all HWP or flawless, and I'm thrilled our clubs represent that and are places just about everyone can feel comfortable and accepted. Even if my body looked different, I wouldn't want to go to a club where everyone looked like me because I really love seeing people of all types who are comfortable, embraced and enjoy themselves, even to excess.

 

[WriterDom]

There is a lot of semi-public play going on via groups. They may not advertise but it's not hard to get an invite. I've been to one in a city as small as 70,000.

 

[Evil_Geoff]

Oh, and you should search around some more. There are clubs in Atlanta, Chicago, Albany, Charlotte, Charleston, and even some in smaller cities...if you know what to look for. Some of them are hidden pretty well.

~tareacel

*grins* And even if the city/town doesn't have a "public play space" or "private BDSM club" around, the groups in those cities often have spaces available in private homes that can accomodate fairly large play parties.

Kink is EVERYWHERE, and so are kinky people!

 

[tareacel]

Please don't encourage him! We don't judgemental jaded types around our club up here.

Hey, I didn't tell him the name of any....**grin** And I doubt he's smart enough to look on his own.

I'm glad I'm not the only person who's had a negative reaction to this guy. It means I'm not *that* paranoid. >.<

~tareacel

 

[bronntanas]

A friend of mine pointed out something very funny. In the smaller kink communities, it's more a matter of networking with like minded people to get invited to functions . You've got to go to munches, be friendly, personable, all that stuff and then people will start asking you around to play. Maybe that's why the OP can't find a small town party.

 

[FurryFury]

I happen to think most people have at least a little kink in them, they just might not realize it yet. LOL.

So, let me see if I get this, there aren't that many kinky people. The scene is small.

Riiiight. That's not been my experience so far.

The people in it aren't snobby fucks like those in Eyes Wide Shut but actually make events open to most, inexpensive and real people with real bodies go there instead of model perfect fakes that would get you off?

Cool!

I'm so glad the OP could clear that shit up for me. Boy do I feel more informed now.

Fury