Dementia: Where Does Ronald Reagan Spend His Daze?

[Lancecastor]

We tend to feel sorry for old people with dementia...but those of you who have talked to elderly relatives in its' grips also know that your loved ones tend to go on trips of varying lengths to long-forgotten parts of their lives.

So I wonder how bad can that really be for an old person to be able to trip through time, largely free of the worries of their earthly demise....

One of my grandmothers spent a lot of her time in the early 1940's on a fishing boat with her long dead husband and all her children, for example, as she lay in bed with terminal cancer counting her days.

I caught my dad wandering around in the 1950's , 1976 and 1963 a few times in his final weeks. He seemed to be having a fine time until I confused him with the newspaper of the day.

I wonder where Ronald Reagan is tonite? On a movie set? Banging a young contract cutie perhaps?

Where would you like to get caught in a loop when the end is near?

 

[Lost Cause]

FUCK YOU!

Why pick on an American President?
I'm sure there's plenty of examples you could use running your pathetic fucking government!

You crossed the line motherfucker...............

 

[Alvin Brickrock]

Where would you like to get caught in a loop when the end is near?

I just want to still have the ability to wipe my own ass, either that or have you there to do it for me. Just in case I'm vacationing in Xanadu at the time, thanks in advance bud.

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: FUCK YOU!

Why pick on an American President?
I'm sure there's plenty of examples you could use running your pathetic fucking government!

You crossed the line motherfucker...............

Well, if I said George Dubya was demented, I'd be inaccurate, because you have to have a mind before you can lose it...but I'm talking here about dementia, a condition most of us will suffer from if we live long enough.

When in Rome, do as the Romans...Ronnie's the perfect example.

I don't see him bombing Iran....I figure he's Governor of Cali or smoothin' on betties on the back lots somewhere....what do you think?

 

[sheath]

We tend to feel sorry for old people with dementia...but those of you who have talked to elderly relatives in its' grips also know that your loved ones tend to go on trips of varying lengths to long-forgotten parts of their lives.

So I wonder how bad can that really be for an old person to be able to trip through time, largely free of the worries of their earthly demise....

One of my grandmothers spent a lot of her time in the early 1940's on a fishing boat with her long dead husband and all her children, for example, as she lay in bed with terminal cancer counting her days.

I caught my dad wandering around in the 1950's , 1976 and 1963 a few times in his final weeks. He seemed to be having a fine time until I confused him with the newspaper of the day.

I wonder where Ronald Reagan is tonite? On a movie set? Banging a young contract cutie perhaps?

Where would you like to get caught in a loop when the end is near?

Very good thread to start, Lance.

I have wondered this so many times. I would catch my grandfather staring off into space, and when I asked him what he was doing, he just said, "Thinking". Then one day I asked him "WHERE are you?" His immediate response was: "On a bus. Going home to Chicago. That was a good day." He was in the late 50s.

I have wondered so often about people like Reagan. I remember the day I read his "twilight" letter, where he gently announced to the public that he had Alzheimers. It would be nice to know where he is, wouldn't it?

I can imagine that those moments between the past and the present must be hell, for the confusion and the pain they cause. But when someone gets that far away look in their eyes and that gentle smile on their face...I have to smile too, and wonder.

Where would I like to get caught in the loop? I would like to be back in that day when I asked Pa where he was, and he told me stories for hours on end. Only this time, I would have my kids with me, so they could hear the stories too. It was a very good day.

S.

 

[Rubyfruit]

Great topic, Lance.

I was there at the end when my grandfather died. For days on end, he went inside of himself. Although he wasn't verbalizing, it was apparent to me that he was on a journey.

I would like to be caught in the loop of when my first child was born, and that amazing first year of becoming a mom. Nothing in my life had prepared me for a love that strong. I want to go back to high school, with no worries and everything ahead of me. I want to relive all of the good times with my friends. And now. Right now and the next 10 years, at least. I'm pretty sure I'll want to see this again.

 

[sheath]

Where would you like to get caught in a loop when the end is near?

Okay, Lance...where would YOU be?

S.

 

[Lancecastor]

The first time I experienced it was through my grandmother, who mistook me for her eldest son, after whom I'm named.

She wanted to know why I was back too early from swilin' (the seal hunt) and whether the pelts and the ice were t'ick (thick).

I was 11 at the time, so I was confused and scared at this little orange woman who used to be my big round pink grandmother talking strange at me....but Dad called in the answers from the side, and before long I was going along with the act well enough that she smiled, told me I was a good son, patted my head and went to sleep.

~~~~~

There are a lot of summers I think I'd like to get caught in I think...high school, university, the year I built the cottage, the father's day my daughter was born, backyard tenting as a boy with my best friend, the first time I swam across the lake, a particular hockey game where I scored a really pretty hat-trick, a September nite in a sand dune with my high school sweetheart....but I wonder about some of the memories already forgotten that I might see again, too.....

 

[loveyamon]

The first time I experienced it was through my grandmother, who mistook me for her eldest son, after whom I'm named.

She wanted to know why I was back too early from swilin' (the seal hunt) and whether the pelts and the ice were t'ick (thick).

I was 11 at the time, so I was confused and scared at this little orange woman who used to be my big round pink grandmother talking strange at me....but Dad called in the answers from the side, and before long I was going along with the act well enough that she smiled, told me I was a good son, patted my head and went to sleep.

~~~~~

There are a lot of summers I think I'd like to get caught in I think...high school, university, the year I built the cottage, the father's day my daughter was born, backyard tenting as a boy with my best friend, the first time I swam across the lake, a particular hockey game where I scored a really pretty hat-trick, a September nite in a sand dune with my high school sweetheart....but I wonder about some of the memories already forgotten that I might see again, too.....

I've known families and still do that are dealing with this. From what I can see it's harder on the non inflicted ones. to the person suffering everyday is a new one , no worries.

 

[freakygirl]

I had a client with Alzheimers.

I have never in my life seen someone suffer so badly before death. This man wouldn't shower because he was afraid of going down the drain. He refused to use a toilet, he would only use a portable one, because he might be flushed. He wouldn't stand in front of the mirror because the man in the mirror stared and copied everything he did. He wouldn't go outside because of the bugs, the birds and the cars.

He wouldn't sleep in a bed because of a fear of falling. He wouldn't go upstairs because they moved (or so he thought). He would scream in fear because of the spider webs in the corner (they weren't there, but I always took a broom and pretended to knock them down. I also used lysol as a "bug repellant" to kill the spiders). That calmed him some.. but not much.

Alzheimers is not a great place to be. The loop isn't wonderful..

My mother has the beginnings of dementia.. I fear the day it turns into full blown Alzheimers. Two of grandparents had it before they died.. I never in my life want to see someone suffer through it again.

 

[REDWAVE]

Ronald Ray-gun

I hear Reagan doesn't even remmeber being President any more. Lucky him. A lot of us would like to be able to forget about his Presidency, but can't.

 

[nimbus9]

I took care of an old friend of mine in his last months. At the start he would have lucid moments. He told me one time, "I may be coo coo but I'm having fun." He was eighty three and would want to sleep during the day and be wide awake at night talking out loud to friends long dead. He was also incontenent. God I hope I don't go like that.

 

[mydestiny2003]

I don't know about anybody else,but I havn't found that loop yet

 

[Gil_Favor]

I never in my life want to see someone suffer through it again.

My Grandfather and Uncle both had alzheimers.

Both are now long dead.

The financial toll on the family was incredible.

The emotional toll was worse.

After a certain point they dont have a clue that they exist.

I wish this disease on no one. =(

 

[Lancecastor]

Obviously, if we talk about dementia from the point of view of the lucid loved ones, it's a debilitating illness.

But that's the point; to the person with dementia, their mind is (largely) free of their body and their worldly concerns.

In this respect...is it not a precursor or link between the land of the living and the afterlife?

 

[sheath]

*BUMP*

Because it's an interesting topic...

S.

 

[freakygirl]

Obviously, if we talk about dementia from the point of view of the lucid loved ones, it's a debilitating illness.

But that's the point; to the person with dementia, their mind is (largely) free of their body and their worldly concerns.

In this respect...is it not a precursor or link between the land of the living and the afterlife?

I have no idea where you are getting the idea that they are free of their body and their worldly concerns.

 

[mydestiny2003]

Dementia:Where does ronald reagan spend His daze

It's because the person that they once were is gone,and all that's left is a empty shell to the outside world.....................

 

[Agent99]

Lance, is "backyard tenting" drrty like I am thinking or did you mean 'camping'?

My grandmother suffered from senile dementia and often confused strangers with family members. But she recalled her youth and regaled us with stories of sitting under the magnolia trees and being courted by beaus. It was a common form of geriopsychosis - where she could remember - with great detail - events from the past, but couldn't tell you what she ate for breakfast.

 

[freakygirl]

Re: Dementia:Where does ronald reagan spend His daze

It's because the person that they once were is gone,and all that's left is a empty shell to the outside world.....................

I realize that.. their old selves... as we know/knew them are gone. But a new self takes over. They are paranoid, depressed and most of the time very lonely (even with family/caregivers around).

They are different people.. with a whole new set of feelings.

 

[freakygirl]

It was a common form of geriopsychosis - where she could remember - with great detail - events from the past, but couldn't tell you what she ate for breakfast.

well hell. I do that

 

[mydestiny2003]

That's true in some cases,but more often than not the place in their mind tends to be a place they want to be,a time in their life
where they were happy and not lonely at all but with the people they loved.

 

[Lancecastor]

Look folks, the idea was not to wring our hands about how awful it is to be old and die or to minimize the effects on those around the demented....though you are certainly free to fill pages with stories of suffering elderly relatives if you wish.

But if you've read the stories in this thread, you have heard stories of how elderly people seem to shed their agedness and are transported, most often quite happily, to crisp, clear remembrances and tellings of stories and times otherwise long forgotten.

Agent99 used the term "geriopsychosis"...that and "dementia" both suggest a "disease" and a "badness" to the "illness".

I suggest that the smiles and stories told by the demented are quite often anything but psychotic....they are freed joyful memories told in the bridging of life and afterlife.

What do you think?

PS: No 99, I wasn't having any fond boyhood homoerotic memories of my best friend...all our homoerotic boyhood memories are quite dark. Ha!

 

[70/30]

My grandfather saw deer, rabbits and squirrels to shoot while on his hospital deathbed. His dementia had a lot to do with him not eating for about a week. Maybe a little resulted from a colostomy procedure that didn't work, evidently he was being poisoned.

I have a family of psychos, the day before he died they were telling the DOC to do another surgery. I told them to shut the fuck up, he barely agreed to have the initial surgeries. Even if it worked, he still had a huge tumor. Damn uncle sam and his sheet metal. If I didn't mention it before, he liked to hunt and grow vegetables in his garden. He didn't like nuking civilians.

 

[Agent99]

Geriopsychosis is a diagnosis for a specific condition as I defined in my first post.

It doesn't imply "badness". On the contrary, it seems that she was quite enjoying tripping down memory lane.

Aging is not a cookie-cutter process. Some folks suffer with debilitating physical ailments and consequently suffer a loss of quality of life. People whose minds drift away from reality seem to fare better - or at least we would like to think so. Sometimes, the relatives or caretakers suffer more for watching the breakdown of mind, body and spirit.

But if we can take away anything positive from observing a loved one in their waning years, we should.