Deep Tissue, Happy Endings 2, Sara (closed for Sidney_1 & StFornicate)

Session 1- Sara Smith

Sidney had sensed that Sara truly was relaxing and becoming more comfortable with being touched, but she wanted Sara to practice being aware of her sensations and feelings, verbalizing what brought her pleasure, and staying present in her body rather than closing down and squashing a feeling out of fear.

“Yes, arousal or the ‘excitement’ phase is a term coined by Masters and Johnson to describe the first phase in the human sexual response cycle. Excitement occurs as a result of physical or mental erotic stimulation or from viewing an erotic image. This is one of the reasons that I will often dress in a “sexy” manner for some of our sessions and you’re welcome to study my form. It's also why we are using mirrors. Women, in all their variety, are beautiful creatures. There’s nothing wrong with being aroused by the sight of another woman. This is a room where guilt and shame are not welcomed. So, I’d like you to continue to focus on what you find arousing. And if it arouses you to glance or stare at my breasts or your own image, then by all means, do it.”

Sidney folded down the top sheet so that Sara’s breasts were fully exposed but the rest of her remained draped.

“I presume that tingly feeling is in your pelvis and perhaps around your vagina? That is your body readying itself for sexual intercourse. In 82% of young females sexual arousal is initiated or enhanced by direct stimulation of the nipples. So, we will gradually begin your breast massage, which should feel very pleasurable and exciting. But, I will be integrating some lymph gland work that might feel a bit tender and painful, but I’d like you to try to work through it with me. In fact, as I massage you, you may have the urge to moan or groan and that is natural to release sexual tension. Making love has a language all it’s own, and sometimes it is helpful and a turn-on to your partner to vocalize your pleasure.”

Sidney knew she was giving Sara a lot of information, but she would be able to review the film if necessary. Sidney bent Sara’s arms so that they were tucked beside her head, giving her full access to the lymph under Sara's arms along the side of her breasts.

She pumped a warmed, floral oil blend into her palm, massaged her hands together, and began with Sara's left breast. Her middle three fingers drew light circles around Sara’s small, firm breast .She began at the base of her breast, making smaller and smaller circles towards Sara’s nipple until she finally circled the pads of her fingers over the nipple which was already partially erect.

Sidney then repeated the same action to Sara’s right breast, hoping the light stimulation wasn’t enough to overwhelm the young girl.

“Sara, if you like, you may want to bend your legs a little bit, or allow your thighs to open a bit, as the tingling may intensify as I continue your breast massage with a bit more intensity, pressure, and focus. If I sense that you’re in a very heightened state of arousal, then I may assess and stimulate your vagina. If you’re relaxed and you don’t hold your breath, then you may be able to orgasm. But, just becoming aware of pleasurable sensations is our goal. We will work on advanced states in future sessions."
 
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'She must have noticed my gaze darting to her breasts.' Sara felt her cheeks turn hot again.

'How does she do that; read me so easily, knowing what I'm feeling and thinking before I even know? So apparently, she also gets aroused by looking at other women. Maybe it is a little normal? I don't know.'

Sara's mind was still trying to rationalize being stimulated by another woman. It went against every grain that her old school/church, Gram had drilled into her. She could still vividly picture her Grandmother's angry, disgusted facial expressions as she ranted about "how bad the world is getting these days" and "todays media is going to be responsible for sending a lot of young people to hell!" Her Grandmother had even taken it as far as refusing to buy or use any product from Johnson & Johnson. And Sara, having the meek personality that she did, was not about to argue with her Gram. Any information coming from Masters and Johnson would have been haracy.

Sara's arms offered no hint of disobedience as Sidney rearranged them above her shoulders. She had been so relaxed and deep in thought that she never even noticed the change until Sidney's warm, oiled hands came in contact with the sensitive skin of her left breast.

“I presume that tingly feeling is in your pelvis and perhaps around your vagina? That is your body readying itself for sexual intercourse."

"Mmm, yes, mainly deep,... inside my vagina. And some on the outside, near the top. It's making it contract and squeeze, again and again. My breasts are a bit tingly as well, especially my nipples." Sara was trying to be as honest as she could with Sidney. As she began to pay closer attention to the sensations, she realized that they were beginning to gain strength, to build, especially when Sidney would stroke near to, or brush over her sensitive nipples.

“Sara, if you like, you may want to bend your legs a little bit, or allow your thighs to open a bit, as the tingling may intensify as I continue your breast massage with a bit more intensity, pressure, and focus. If I sense that you’re in a very heightened state of arousal, then I may assess and stimulate your vagina."

'Did she just say that she may assess and stimulate my vagina?' Sara's mind began trying to rekindle a rebuttal. 'How exactly would she asses that?'

Sara felt her heart begin to beat a little faster and harder. Another wave of tingling tumbled through her core, landing with a crash in her warming sex.

"If you’re relaxed and you don’t hold your breath, then you may be able to orgasm. But, just becoming aware of pleasurable sensations is our goal. We will work on advanced states in future sessions."

'Orgasm, Sara? She's going to make you orgasm?' Sara's brain was still trying to kick up a fuss, to rationalize a reason why she should not be allowing this to happen to her. How instead, she should be bolting out of the door. But her body, full of cravings, full of these new, building sensations that were crying out to be explored, betrayed her. Slowly, almost involuntarily, her knees parted as her feet crept up just a little on the table. And she closed her eyes.
 
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Session 1- Sara Smith

“Wonderful, Sara, I want you to continue to focus on these exciting new sensations and allow yourself to feel aroused without any expectations. Stay in the moment with me. I only mentioned the possibility of an orgasm, because that is always a possibility and I want you to be open to it. Although I wouldn’t expect it to occur on your first visit and with limited time for stimulation; sometimes people surprise me. And I didn’t want you to be surprised.”

Sidney used the pads of her fingers, but with much more pressure to massage the lymph glands starting at the top of Sara’s sternum and running down the length of her left breast. Once she reached the bottom of Sara’s left breast, she cupped it firmly, and then massaged it with almost a gripping motion over the entire breast, kneading her fingers deeply into Sara’s gland tissue.

Sara’s small, conical breasts were easy to manipulate in Sidney’s strong hands. Sara was arching her back and chest towards Sidney and it was unclear whether she was bringing Sara pleasure or pain. Sidney intuited a bit of both.

Sidney felt the wetness and excitement in her own vagina just from watching Sara’s awakening and from studying the movement of her firm breast in her hands. It was always a pleasant sensation to squeeze breast tissue.

“Sara, I know this can feel a bit tender and vigorous, but your lymph system is designed to drain waste products – bacteria and viruses - and to fight infections. It’s very important to allow the lymph to flow freely and this cannot occur if you are constantly wearing tight bras. Some of these nodes may feel tender, and I apologize.”

Sidney completed the lymph drainage massage by working all the way along the side of Sara’s left breast and into her arm pit.

“Wonderful, now I’m going to repeat the same process, on your right breast and then we’ll focus on more erotic forms of massage and we’ll give your nipples some attention. But, please know that what I’m doing to you—I do for myself regularly. My breasts are large, and although I don’t always wear a restrictive bra, I do wear very snug sport bras when I exercise and often in my day-to-day life in public. We’ll review this exercise later – that’s how important that I think it is for you to perform at least a few times a week.”

Sidney continued the same lymphatic massage on Sara’s right breast.

Upon conclusion, she poured more of the warmed, floral oil into her hands, rubbed them lightly together and placed them lightly over Sara’s upper chest and began to lightly massage both of her breasts at the same time.

“Sara, I’m just checking in. How are you feeling? I would really like to give your nipples some love and attention. And as I massage them, with your permission, I’d like you to talk about any thoughts or feelings that arise. Or, if you are simply lost into a feeling of pleasant sensations, then that is fine, too. I want you to appreciate the fact that you have healthy breasts; they are firm, perky, and very unique. They can be a source of much pleasure for you and for your partner.”
 
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The firm massage that Sidney applied to Sara's lymph glands elicited a wince from time to time. Understanding that it would cause some discomfort, Sidney used the technique for only a couple of minutes at a time, mixing in some stroking, kneading, and squeezing of her breasts.

Another new experience for Sara; this mix of pain and pleasure. She would arch her back in response to the almost painful lymph massage, and then roll her hips slightly when Sidney switched to softer, more sensual techniques on her young breasts.

“Sara, I’m just checking in. How are you feeling? I would really like to give your nipples some love and attention. And as I massage them, with your permission, I’d like you to talk about any thoughts or feelings that arise. Or, if you are simply lost into a feeling of pleasant sensations, then that is fine, too. I want you to appreciate the fact that you have healthy breasts; they are firm, perky, and very unique. They can be a source of much pleasure for you and for your partner.”

'Oh yes, feedback. I'm supposed to be giving feedback, duh.' Sidney had switched to smooth, flat handed strokes which were going down the center of Sara's chest, around her ribcage to her armpits and then finishing on her breasts.

"Mmmm, that feels so good. The lymph work felt a little intense a couple of times, but the stroking and kneading feels wonderful. Um, ok, you can work more directly on my nipples. Oh, but hang on a sec, I just got this terrible itch on the bottom of my foot! I have to scratch it."

Sara sat up quickly as though she were needing to swat a mosquito. The warm light of the candles illuminating her healthy skin, casting shadows around her young, perky breasts as she tended to her itch.

"Okay, thanks, that's better." She said as she lay back down, repositioning her arms over her head.

Sara felt ok for the first time in her life about anyone viewing or touching her nipples. There was something about Sidney, mainly her professionalism that made Sara feel at ease and accepted as is. Sara could sense that Sidney really enjoyed her work. But it wasn't just her professionalism. Sara found that she was being increasing stimulated, sexually, by Sidney.

Sara decided to try to keep her eyes open this time. She was curious as to what kind of direct attention Sidney was going to administer to her nipples. Not able to keep her eyes just on her own reflection, she kept glancing at Sidney's larger breasts, and the way they moved as she worked. She couldn't help but wonder, what it would be like to feel and squeeze her breasts and nipples.
 
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Session 1- Sara Smith

For the first time, Sidney noticed that Sara easily and eagerly opened her body, or at least her breasts, as she quickly scratched her itch, and then resumed the prior position.

Sidney smiled with amusement at Sara's actions; her need to change the subject and get distracted as the conversation and massage moved closer to her nipples.

But, Sara’s hazel eyes were now wide with wonder. She studied Sidney's actions in the mirror - darting her eyes between her own breasts and nipples and Sidney's.

Sidney continued to knead, circle, massage, and cup Sara's beautiful, conical breasts as she spoke about her sensations and experiences.

Sidney sensed Sara's desire, curiosity, and fascination about breasts. . .Sidney's breasts. . . what it would feel like to touch them, squeeze them, bounce them in her hands, watch them become erect from stimulation. Sidney was well-aware that Sara was sub-consciously absorbing how Sidney felt about her body and sexuality and assimilating it for herself.

Sidney caught Sara’s eyes and pressed her firm, perky breasts together from the undersides and gently lifted them, creating a small, but equally sexy cleavage.

“You are absolutely beautiful, and I hope that you are beginning to feel that way. Do you know only 2-3% of American women feel beautiful? I want you to pretend that you’re in that 2%. And that means loving yourself from the inside out. You have to know that you are worthy of love, capable of love, and open to loving yourself and others. This is a core value of my massage practice and I’m going to massage these ideas into you as I work on your gorgeous nipples. Not only would I like you to enjoy your body and who you are, but if you don’t, you will fall into destructive relationships where you will need to have other people validate your worth. This is something that you need to do for yourself, so that you can come as whole as possible to each relationship. I'm not telling you this to scare you, it's just a pattern that I see people repeat who do not have a positive self-regard.”

Sidney held Sara’s left breast in place while drizzling warm oil directly over her left and right nipples, lightly massaging the oil with a quick tapping motion over both of her nipples.

Sara’s nipples quickly bloomed between Sidney's fingers and it seemed to turn her on as she watched the process.

Sidney then worked more deliberately; directlng her movements near and over Sara's puffy nipples, slowing the tapping so that her fingers gently pressed into Sara's areola and created only the slightest pressure against Sara's rising nipples.

Sidney had rarely seen nipples that were so pronounced. She gathered Sara's small breasts into each of her hands and then gently squeezed her nipples with her thumb and forefinger. Sidney then released Sara's breasts and continued to use the lubrication from the oil to make small circles with her forefinger at the base of Sara's nipple, and then worked outwards in circles, reversing the flow of how her hands had initially circled into Sara's young buds.

Sidney could sense her own arousal, the wetness and tightness in her sex as she watched Sara awaken.
 
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Sara smiled a faint smile at Sidney when she pressed her breasts together. She actually liked the way it looked in the mirror above, the forced cleavage in Sidney's hands and her shiney, oiled skin glistening in the candlelight. It felt wonderful, not just relaxing, but stimulating as well. Minute by minute Sidneys' touch continued bringing with it new sensations that Sara had never experienced.

As Sidneys' words about the importance of self acceptance and self love sank into Saras' heart and soul, she felt her eyes begin to burn. Sara had never been able to love and accept her own body. But after just one hours' time with Sidney she was beginning to feel so different, so aware of these feelings, so much more open, and yearning to be loved.

Sara swallowed hard, her vision clouding with tears that she was fighting to retain. She was sure that Sidney sensed her emotional state, but she obviously thought it part of the process, continuing her measures of healing and stimulating massage.

When Sidney began tapping and squeezing Sara's tender nipples with the oil, another rush of tingles entered her there, seemingly making a b-line through the core of her body and straight into her vagina.

"Mmmmm, oohhh", Sara moaned and sighed softly, barely audible over the music as Sidney pinched her nipples. Her eyelids were fluttering as she tried to keep them open to watch.

The sensations created were running so deep in her core that she began arching her back again. And in attempt to retain some assemblance of control over the intense, spasmy feelings now building ever stronger in her vagina, she pressed her thighs together. She began squeezing and rolling her hips gently, as if she were a young child, trying to supress the urge to urinate.

"Oh Sidney, that's making me feel like....ohhh..wow....that's so good...wow..intense." Sara tried hard to keep up her communications with Sidney.

She could feel a trickle of moisture escape her folds and trail down her taint and over her anus.
 
Session 1- Sara Smith

Sidney was amazed at how once a client got out of his or her own way, blockages dissolved; and they could be open to new experiences—emotionally, physically, spiritually, and sexually. Still, it was impressive that this shy, repressed girl was beginning to bloom just within this first session with her. It seemed as if there was a new quickening that was occurring in her practice with many clients.

“Wonderful, Sara, see how pleasurable your body can make you feel when you’re relaxed and trust someone?” Sidney asked rhetorically, before giving Sara’s nipples one last firm pinch.

Sidney brought Sara’s arms down from behind her head and placed them over Sara’s own stimulated breasts.

“If you like, you can practice caressing yourself as if you were masturbating at home. You can stay in the moment with me, or some people like to create a fantasy. . . perhaps a handsome man or even woman is now asking you, or begging you, if they can kiss your breasts, that they find them incredibly sexy and unique and they can’t get enough of them. You might even find it arousing to lick a few of your fingers and touch them to your nipples and imagine a tongue passing over them. That is very arousing. . .to have your nipples kissed and caressed by your lover's tongue. Some women enjoy having them sucked, too. But most clients tend to stay present and enjoy watching themselves with me. And when you are with a partner, it is best to stay present with him/her.”

Sidney smiled and moved her hands down to Sara’s flat belly, and then lightly massaged her toned legs. Sara was already using the massage table as friction for her own pleasure. While keeping a hand on Sara’s calf, and then foot, Sidney moved the mirror at the foot of the table so that Sara (and the camera) would be able to see her own genitalia clearly.

“Sara, I think you’re starting to feel very aroused. In addition to voicing your pleasure, your partner should always make sure you’re well lubricated before they enter you. I normally would arouse you by massaging your inner thighs, but I think we’re ready to explore and learn how to bring joy to your clitoris. You’re using friction right now, and that is fine, I can leave you and you can enjoy some private time. . .or we can explore what it might feel like to have your clitoris manually stimulated, since you’ve shared that you’ve never been able to bring yourself to have an orgasm. And this is a very basic way to have one. . .” Sidney said, gently.

Sidney’s own pussy felt soaked and she had a strong desire to be penetrated and fucked. Or, at the very least, to self-pleasure and achieve an intense orgasm. Watching Sara’s excitement build and feeling her tension… well, the transference was intense.
 
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"Um, I think I'd like you to please stay." Sara looked at Sidney with pleading eyes as she reached and put a hand on her forearm. "Uhh, I'm not sure I could do it by myself. I haven't been able to before. What should I do exactly?" She was afraid that if Sidney left the room, or left it to her to take over the stimulation herself, she'd fail and become frustrated.

Sara reached her hands up to her still oiled nipples. She began to squeeze and twist them between her fingers, nervously trying to replicate the sensations that Sidney had created with her touch. She looked at Sidney longingly in the mirror; at her face, her breasts, and her exposed abdomen. She stared at her bralette where her nipples were concealed beneath, straining to see through the patterned lace.
 
Session 1- Sara Smith

Sidney could see the panic and desperation in Sara’s face and actions and couldn’t believe that she had made the same mistake twice with Sara!

It was a fine line between sensing/knowing when Sara needed to feel in control and when she needed gentle guidance. She seemed to prefer the latter. Sidney also knew Sara was very curious about her body.

“Okay, Sara, we’re going to try a mirroring exercise. I’m going to straddle you, with my weight on my heels, so you can continue to move as you are with your pelvis. I’ll also be able to stimulate you when I feel you’re ready and the camera will capture it perfectly.”

Sidney hoisted herself so that she was kneeling above Sara who was frantically trying to stimulate herself.

Sidney gently took her hands and placed them in hers, and then onto her own body, around the curves of her waist, her belly, and then right below the swell of her breasts.

“Would you like to touch my bare breasts, Sara?” Sidney asked, as she guided Sara’s nervous hands upwards to cup the lacy bralette and then across her cleavage.
 
Sara's wide eyes had darted back and forth frantically from Sidney to her own reflection in the mirror as she her body stiffened. She tugged and squeezed at her nipples, trying to duplicate the erotic sensations that Sidneys' hands had created. It was as if her nervous system had surged, bringing her to a level 9 in mere seconds!

Sidney had acted fast to resolve the issue. It wasn't until she had taken the extreme measure of mounting Sara on the table, and took her hands into her own that Sara was able to come back down, and her panic began to dissolve. But this is what Sidney was trained to do; gently push and guide her clients, testing and broadening the limits of their unhealthy boundaries, in order to help them remove the walls restricting them.

She inhaled some slow, deep breaths as she stared intently into Sidney's patient, smiling face. When Sara had finally melted back down into the massage table beneath them, Sidney had placed their hands on her own body and worked them up to just below her larger breasts.

“Would you like to touch my bare breasts, Sara?"

Sara could feel a nervous, yet erotic twinge run deeply through her core again as she contemplated the idea. She had fantasized about that very action at least four times since meeting Sidney not even two hours prior.

'Did she know that I had thought about that? Could she read me that easily?' Sara wondered.

Saras' expression grew focused. Her anticipation and curiosity again awakening.

She gave a slight nod, "yes", as she ever so slightly moved her fingers, feeling Sidney's squishy flesh beneath them.
 
Sidney smiled, grateful that her intuition and Sara’s invisible support team were helping to guide the session. The spontaneous nature of these sessions were what really made her excited about her work. Not only was she communing with another soul, but she was communing with other realms regularly.

“Wonderful,” Sidney replied, grateful to see that Sara’s expression had relaxed and her eyes were wide with awe.

Sidney placed Sara’s hands down by her hips, while she leaned forward and removed her bralette in one smooth motion over her head. She tossed the clip holding her long, brown hair onto the side station near the oils. Sidney watched intently as Sara studied the bounce of her breasts after being expelled from her top and from shaking her hair so that it was lying smoothly along her back.

“There, this is much better. Now you can see and touch my breasts that you’ve been admiring with your eyes and your kind comments. Perhaps you’ll find that you love touching another woman’s breasts or that it turns you off. We’ll find out, right?”

Sidney smiled, her breasts bouncing once again, as she pumped warm oil into her hands and spread a light layer over her own upper chest and bosom. She then caressed Sara’s hands with the remainder and placed Sara’s hands right at her solar plexus. Sidney placed her hands on Sara’s belly in the same position.

“Okay, Sara, do you think you can mimic what I’m doing to you with your hands on me? You’ll be able to look, watch, study, experience, and observe how I react to touch and pleasure. This is an open dialogue between us, so if you have questions or concerns you can ask. . . but, I’d like you to stay very present in your body as much as possible. Don’t force yourself to talk if you don’t need to. Are you ready?” Sidney asked.

She could feel her own chi rising from her feet to the top of her head. Soon, she knew her sexual energy would feel electric in her nipples and her sex if she was able to soothe Sara’s nervous energy.
 
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Sara's delicate fingers trembled a little against Sidney's skin where Sidney had placed them at her sternum. She was anticipating what was going to happen next. Sidney was going to massage and stimulate her breasts and nipples and Sara was to duplicate the action on Sidney.

She was quite surprised when Sidney had promptly decided to remove her own top, exposing her naked breasts to her. It was definitely not what she had expected her massage therapist to do, but the very hidden, secretly inquisive side of Sara was glad that she had. Now she was able to study Sidney's nipples and breasts up close, and even touch them herself! She watched the way they moved and jiggled with Sidney's movements.

Sara felt her heart raced in anticipation. She could feel the heat from Sidney's lace covered sex eminating onto her own. She'd never been this close to another woman before, or a guy for that matter. And even though Sidney was just her therapist, she was still nearly nude! And on top of her, suggesting that they massage each others breasts!
 
Session 1- Sara Smith

Sidney could sense the fear in Sara’s trembling fingers, so she moved her hands off of Sara’s solar plexus and placed her hands over Sara’s on her own body.

“Sara, I only want you to do what feels good to you. I’m trying to show you different ways that you can touch yourself so you can discover - with practice, privately, at home – what arouses you so you can start to feel more comfortable with your body. If you are uncomfortable with your body, you’ll never feel comfortable being intimate with another person. I personally love sex and intimacy, I love giving and accepting pleasure, and I’d love to teach and mentor you as well. I think you’ve shown remarkable growth just within the short time of this session. So, all that being said, you don’t have to follow along if you don’t want to, but you can if you’re curious. It doesn’t mean you are bisexual or weird. You’re just exploring for now and learning about yourself. You have to experiment and be open to new experiences. Since your session is almost over, we’ll just do this one last exercise and then I will give you a little private reflection time and we’ll review your session and our plan going forward.”

As Sidney spoke, she moved Sara’s hands so that they were right under her full breasts. Sidney pressed her hands into Sara’s, encouraging her to cup her breasts, so she could feel the movement of her breasts within Sara’s nervous grip.

“Okay, Sara, I’m going to cup your breasts as well, and you can follow along if you like,” Sidney said, as she began to gently thrust her own aroused sex against Sara’s belly.

Sidney gave Sara’s breasts a gentle squeeze. She made slow circles with the flat of her hands around Sara’s breasts, watching for Sara to show signs of arousal.

“I often find that it is nice to just start gently, teasingly, with a light, caressing touch,” Sidney said, as she arched her back and thrust her chest forwards, her nipples already puckering from the sexual talk and her own memories of sex and masturbation.

She hoped Leonard was free tonight. She needed it bad.
 
Sara squeezed the flesh forming the underside of Sidney's breasts as she watched the skin around her nipples tighten. She loved how they looked, compared to her own, oddly shaped nipples. Sidneys hands felt soft, yet affirmative over her own, settling the tremble in them.

Sidneys words about exploring together, trying new things and experimenting with touch and sensations were comforting to her. It was much less intimidating than the thought of returning to her bedroom alone to attempt another conjuring of forced feelings and sensations. She had already been down that road and it had frustrated her to tears. The thought of exploring with one of the insensitive guys she went to school with was even more intimidating.

Although she was still nervous about the new experience in general, Sara felt safe and secure with Sidney. She trusted Sidney and her knowledge of intimacy.

"I think this is good.....I mean.....I think it is helping a lot to have you....to have you guiding me like this." Sara said.

Sara watched Sidney's breasts move under her touch. They were quite a bit larger, fleshier than her own breasts, full, but soft.

When Sidney moved her hands to Sara's breasts, cupping them and then rubbing them gently, Sara sighed, relaxing more deeply again. Sidneys fingers grazed over her nipples, reminding her of how sensitive they had become. Her touch there again sent a small jolt deep into her groin. Sara circled her hips upward in response to the sensation, a natural reaction of her sex, reaching and searching for further stimulation.

This time, however was different than the earlier massage administered by Sidney. This time, Sara had her own hands on Sidney's bare breasts, the same breasts she'd secretly wondered and fantasized about in the mirrors' reflection when Sidney was massaging hers. Now Sidney was not only allowing, but instructing her to touch, feel and explore them.

"You.....you have very nice nipples." Sara said quietly. "You're breasts feel really....um, soft and heavy at the same time."

She watched as Sidney arched her back and tipped her head back slightly, pushing her breasts further into Sara's hands.

'She looks so beautiful,' Sara thought, with her long hair flowing down over her shoulders.' Some of it had fallen to the front and was gently tickling the backs of Sara's hands, adding another, new sensation for Sara. She could feel the heat from Sidney's vagina against the skin of her abdomen when she lowered herself downward and against her. The thin fabric of Sidney's panties had soaked through with moisture. Sara began to realize that Sidney was also becoming very aroused by the therapeutic activities.

Sara had brushed over Sidney's nipples a couple of times, indirectly, as she was duplicating the caressing of her breasts. She stared at the nipples above her. She really wanted to explore them further, feel them, squeeze them, as they were so much larger and prettier than her own. She felt her vagina contract in anticipation as she found the nerve to ask Sidney.

"May....uummmm, ...do you mind.....uhhh..may I touch your nipples, Sidney?" Sara asked with a shaky, timid voice.
 
Session 3- Sara Smith

Sidney was pleased that Sara was comfortable enough to start to sense and want to act on her own sensual urges. Sara’s nervous hands, and the way she studied every nuance, shot an unexpected thrill to her own center. Sidney acknowledged her arousal, but remained focused on Sara’s needs as she had been trained to do. She knew Sara was absorbing everything about her.

Sidney centered her palm over Sara’s nipples and then squeezed each of Sara’s breasts firmly in her hands. Sara paused her hand movements for a moment and groaned softly.

“Mmm, that feels nice doesn’t it? Thank you; I think we both have beautiful breasts and nipples,” Sidney said, as she continued to knead Sara’s small, perky breasts.

Sara’s pelvis was beginning to rise and fall as she became more aroused.

“Of course you can act independently now. I’m giving you free rein to explore your curiosities. I’ll just continue to caress you in an intuitive fashion.”

Sidney released her firm grip on Sara’s breasts. With her index finger she drew small circles over and around Sara’s puffy nipples, brushing them lightly with her fingertip. Soon, her nipples were projecting like mini torpedoes from her chest.

“You have beautiful, pronounced nipples, Sara,” Sidney whispered, gently pinching Sara’s nipples. She had no idea where Sara was in her cycle and if they were particularly sensitive today. “You are going to find a woman or a man who finds your breasts and nipples fascinating; very erotic. They will want to caress them, study them as you are studying me, play with them in various ways, and perhaps tease them with their tongue. It can feel very arousing with the right person.”

Sidney continued to gently tease Sara’s nipples and breasts as Sara began to explore her breasts.

“I’m going to give you a few minutes to explore and watch and then I’d like to connect you to your sexual center, so you can start recognizing your arousal and continue to feel comfortable acting upon it and exploring your pleasure.”

Sidney couldn’t wait to brush her fingers along Sara’s sex. She knew Sara was going to love it. Sidney could feel the tingling and excitement in her own sex in anticipation of the new experiences ahead for Sara.

It already felt so gratifying and stimulating to see Sara beginning to open up to her burgeoning sexuality.
 
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Sara inhaled sharply and closed her eyes for a moment when Sidney squeezed her sensitive nipples, pausing the actions of her own hands on Sidney's breasts. The sensation was intense, Sidney's hands so gentle and warm. She arched her back, welcoming it, searching for more in her own, unspoken language.

Sara had never before reached this level of arousal with anyone. Not that she hadn't attempted, but she struggled greatly to even mentally allow it to happen.

Her extreme, fundamentalist upbringing with her Gram, as well as a few bad experiences with impatient, male piers in the past, had caused Sara to completely shut down sexually, before she had ever a chance to bloom. Sidney was slowly and patiently dismantling the walls Sara had built.

Sara opened her eyes again. She looked into Sidney's eyes, a feeling of intense curiosity and arousal washing over her. Focusing steadily on Sidney's breasts, she pulled her oily fingers together until they met on the stiffened flesh of Sidney's nipples. Sara squeezed them gently, feeling the nubs give slightly under her grip. They were a bit longer than her own. Facinated by their feel, she began rolling and tugging them a bit. Sidney moaned slightly and Sara returned her eyes to her face, studying her mouth as it had parted a little, allowing a heavy breath to escape. Sara imagined at that moment, kissing Sidney; how it would feel, her soft lips, her wet tongue sliding against her own. Sidney closed her eyes momentarily, but didn't pause in her returned actions.

Sara moaned again, her own arousal heightened by the experience of exploring Sidney's oiled breasts with her own hands, as well as the fantasy of kissing her.

"Ohh......wow, you....I mean I, I mean......this" Sara tried to give feedback between heavy breaths. "This feels.....this feels.......so......good, Sidney. You're nipples are so......beautiful....they feel so.....oh."

Sara tried to keep her eyes open, but the intensity of the moment kept beckoning them closed again. She arched her back, pressing herself against Sidneys warm center. She began grinding her own hips more firmly into the bed and drawing up her knees, as her body began searching, yearning for some kind of release. She continued a little more fervently now, rolling and pinching Sidneys nipples.
 
Sidney smiled with amusement.

“Well, I’m glad you’re finding my nipples – such a turn-on. And I hope by caressing you, that you’re learning what brings you pleasure, too.”

Sidney gave Sara’s breasts one last squeeze, and gently pressed and pinched her puffy nipples.

“Your nipples are sensitive and gorgeous, too,” Sidney said, as she eased Sara’s eager hands away from her chest and back to Sara’s chest.

“I’d like you to continue to pleasure yourself, for a moment.”

Sidney quickly slipped her bra-lette back on so she could concentrate fully on Sara’s needs.

“Now, I am going to remain with you for just another minute. I know you’re finally aroused, but I promise that you will feel this way again if you allow yourself to be open to new experiences. This is just the beginning, Sara.”

Sidney gently folded back the drape covering Sara’s lower body.

“I’m going to very gently touch your vaginal lips and show you how you can stimulate yourself to an orgasm eventually. For now, you might want to just enjoy the new sensations. The video will show the details, although I don’t think you’ll need it if you remain very present with me. Just focus on your breathing Sara; keep it steady. The one thing that will prevent an orgasm is if you hold your breath. But, for now, what I’m doing should just feel very . . . tingly. You might feel your vagina spasming slightly.”

Sidney brushed her fingers along Sara’s labia. She was soaked with moisture. She settled her fingers near the base of Sara’s clitoral hood, and made very subtle back and forth motions that caused the hood to brush against Sara’s clitoris.

“It’s a little bit of a challenge for me to do this for you . ..only you know how much pressure and what type of stimulation you like. If you touch your clitoris directly, it can be painful and unpleasant. When you’re in an intimate, sexual relationship, you and your partner should take it very slowly and explore what brings you pleasure. Just touching in this way. . . very slowly. . . after a lot of foreplay. . .can often bring a woman to an intense orgasm. It takes a very unselfish man or woman who will hold you, pleasure you, and help you explore what you love sexually. But, I assure you, it can be so much fun and very intimate.”

Sidney could see Sara’s body beginning to quiver from her light touch. She knew if she had another twenty minutes that Sara might even be able to have an orgasm. But, they were out of time.

“So, Sara, this is where your clitoris is. . . and it is a pleasurable place to touch. I’d like you to touch this area for a few moments just to get familiar with it. You should be able to mimic what I am doing. I’m going to give you a few minutes of private time, and then I’ll meet you in the lobby when you’re ready, okay? We’ll review your session, I’ll make some suggestions for you, and we’ll talk about what you’d like to try in our next session.”

Sidney smiled and winked.

“I’ll set a five minute wind chime timer, so you don’t lose sense of time. Again, just focus on feeling good about your body, not on achieving an orgasm, specifically. Baby steps.”

Sidney shut the door and headed back to her office to dress and reflect on Sara’s session. Once refreshed, she wrote a list of recommendations and headed to the lobby to wait for Sara.
 
Sara felt disappointed when Sidney took her breasts away from her, covering them up again with her lace bralette. She had been enjoying the new sensations brought on by the intimate, exploratory touching and massage.

As Sidney spoke she moved the sheet, exposing the lower half of Sara's nude body. Sara watched in the mirror on the ceiling.

When Sidney's fingertips had first ghosted across Sara's labia, Sara inhaled sharply. Her skin felt electrified; every nerve, awake and on high alert. The initial touch, though light, felt as if it were magnified tenfold. The abundance of arousal fluid that lay waiting between Sara's sensitive flesh aided the movement of Sidney's fingertips.

"Ohh...my", Sara couldn't help but mutter as her hips curled upward to greet the stimulating touch. She breathed in sharply again as Sidney's fingertips located the firm nub of her erect clitoris. It buzzed with sensation as Sidney began slight, indirect manipulation with her fingertips.

This is when Sidney reminded Sara not to hold her breath. It made sense as her blood carried oxygen to her sensitive areas. She needed to keep the oxygen levels high in her bloodstream. Sara slowed her breathing and tried to relax some.

But then Sidney stopped again.

"I have never been touched that nicely before. One guy I went out with tried shoving his hand down my shorts when he kissed me. But it definitely did not feel like that. Maybe someday I'll meet a nice man that treats me as you say."

After Sidney left the room Sara drew her right knee up and out to the side on the massage table. She looked at her vagina in the mirror, then with trembling fingers, touched it. It felt very slippery, and reminded her of raw egg. She then drew her left knee up and out so she could see better.

Sara squished her first two fingers between her swollen labia and slid them up to the top where Sidney had been gently rubbing. She spread the flesh and peered between, cocking her head as she studied the reflection of her exposed clitoris poking out from its hood. Sliding her fingers back down, she then located her small opening. She spread her labia with two fingers of one hand and poked a fingertip just inside. She watched as it entered the small space. Sara tried to imagine a man's penis penetrating her there. How would it feel? She had heard her friends say that the first time hurt a little, as it would tear the delicate skin of the hymen inside. She couldn't imagine the feeling. The thought kind of scared her.

Sliding back up to her clitoris, she tried to duplicate the stimulation that Sidney had applied. But the erotic sensations were ebbing away with Sidney gone, and Sara couldn't seem to find the same spot or pressure.

Feeling emotionally and mentally drained from the intensity of the session, Sara gave up. Her head hurt a little and she was thirsty. After robing herself, she headed to the dressing room, where this time she gave no attention to the distorted reflection in the mirror. She was done.

Sara found her way to the lobby where Sidney was waiting.
 
Session 1- Sara Smith- wrap up

Sidney met Sara with a smile. She had slipped back into her dress and heels and had refreshed her hair. Sara looked exhausted and defeated. Sidney knew it had been an intense session. First visits were often draining. Letting go of old, ingrained patterns. . . experimenting with new ideas. It wasn’t easy. Especially if there was a lot of underlying fear and resistance as she sensed Sara had.

“Have a seat, Sara,” Sidney said, gently. “I’m very proud of you for even completing your session. To be honest, I knew you weren’t ready for a massage, even though you booked an appointment, so I just had to be flexible with you. I’m glad you were open to new experiences. So, how are you feeling? It’s normal to feel a bit overwhelmed at first. You have a lot of defense mechanisms, fears, and old recordings that you’re playing in your head. But, fortunately, you are also very curious, so that is working in your favor. That’s what I’ve sensed, anyway. Anyway, I’m sorry, I asked you about your how you’re feeling and then I didn’t let you speak. How are you feeling? And please, don’t worry about hurting my feelings. I know I’m not for everyone. By the time most clients see me, they usually have very few defense mechanisms and they are ready for change.”
 
Sara's childlike slouch in the cherrywood, upholstered chair reflected her state of mental and emotional exhaustion. She peered wearily at Sidney who was sitting upright with her legs crossed, holding a notepad and pen in her lap.

Sidney had an aura about her that Sara had discovered to be soothing. She seemed to have an understanding of her inner turmoil. Or at the very least, Sidney hadn't looked at her as if a second head had sprouted from her neck, as her peers did when she had tried to explain to them about her intimacy problems.

Sidneys' womanly self confidence and the mature manner in which she had looked at and touched Sara's nude body, and the way she had spoken to her about her body's sexual sensations and responses, had guided Sara closer than she had ever been to an orgasm.

Having lost her mother at such a young age, and with no siblings, Sara lacked having another female in her life that she could feel comfortable enough to form a bond with. She had her grandmother of course, whom had raised her most of her life. But if you could picture a bible toting, Puritan version of Cruella Deville, she wasn't the kind of lady that one could envision helping to ease a young girl into womanhood.

So now the universe had guided the young Sara to the mercy of Sidney Peters, her very soul feeling raw and exposed after taking these brave, first steps towards healthy, intimate, sexual fulfillment.

"I feel like this was a very big, very nerve wracking first step for me, but in the right direction....I think...I hope." She paused and took a deep breath, forcefully exhaling it. "I mean..... Dr Davidson tried so hard to help me. He was so patient, so nice. He really did try, but....it just wasn't working. And I had become so frustrated that I was seriously about to give up and just accept the idea that I was destined to be a single, cat lady. I mean.....who wants a partner that freaks out every time they are touched? Or who freaks out at the thought of touching them?"

Sara paused, rubbing her temples in attempt to soothe her headache, and then took a sip from her water bottle.

"This .....massage ....session." Sara paused and released a small smile, realizing after she had said the words that what she had just experienced was not what one would consider a traditional massage session.... by any means. "It was really intense. But in a good way. I mean, it's like.." Sara's eyes wandered around the room as she tried to come up with the right words to convey to Sidney how she felt.

She began again. "I mean, it's like your not just a therapist like one would think of a therapist. It's kinda like your a big sister or a special friend or something. I didn't know there was such thing as this kind of therapy. And I'm glad that Dr. Davidson knew about you and thought of you for helping me. I'm sure I'm not your typical kind of client."

Sara took another sip of water, then set her water bottle on her lap and hugged her arms around her chest.

"I'd like to keep working with you if you'd be willing to try and help me. Today, with you, was the most I've ever been able to open up, intimately, with anyone! Even myself! I know, pretty weird and pathetic. But maybe, with your help I can learn how to intimately connect, not only with myself and by myself, but with another. I have never seen or touched a man, you know, naked.... before... ever. And today, you....you are really the first person I've touched that way. But it felt nice, and safe...with you."
 
Session 1- Sara Smith- wrap up

“I’m so glad our session felt liberating and positive for you. You did beautifully. I just accept people where they are and I take inspired action. My most influential teacher taught me to trust myself. I’m not a traditionalist in anything, although I think my education and background do serve me in my work. I just have to be true to myself—and if I work in the Western style—I just can’t seem to move people forward with a momentum that I find satisfying. By integrating all of who I am with each interaction. . .well, I just get better outcomes, more quickly, and then I can help more people. But, we’re all always growing, even if it feels like we’re not. Including me.”

Sidney smiled as Sara’s eyes grew wide with surprise.

“Yes, and that’s where knowing how to be self-aware and knowing how to soothe yourself is so beneficial. So, let’s pretend I am Sara Smith and I know what is best for me in order to help me become more intimate with myself. We won’t worry about partnership for now. I’m going to help you with this list, but I’d like to hear your ideas for what should be on your list of things you can do to help you over the next week. Even just two things. . .” Sidney said.

Sidney already had half a dozen ideas, but she knew it was best for Sara to start getting in touch with her own inner knowledge and wisdom.
 
Sara suddenly became self aware of her poor posture when Sidney began speaking again. She straightened herself in her chair and smoothed her skirt, listening carefully to Sidney's kind words.

She was a little surprised at Sidney's acceptance of, and willingness to continue working with her unique situation. After Dr. Davidson had gone through all of his methods unsuccessfully, she had begun to feel hopeless. And now, as she processed what Sidney had said, she felt... for the first time, understood and accepted. It was as if Sara had wittnessed a small dot representing herself, appear......and though just barely within the measureable margin on the graph of "normal", she was still there. The realization caused a sharp knot to form in Sara's throat as a single, hot tear escaped down her flushed cheek.

Sidney handed a tissue to Sara and paused for a moment. She gently squeezed Sara's hand and smiled knowingly before she continued with her idea of creating a list.

Taking a few deep breaths, Sara tried to relax as she listened. She sat quietly, thinking for a few minutes as Sidney finished and then looked down at her lap and began jotting notes.

"Well," Sara began. "I guess one thing I should do is stop wearing a bra to bed. You said earlier that it wasn't good for my lymph glands. And I suppose it would also be a step towards becoming comfortable with my breasts in general."

"I'm sure that you would also say that I should practice touching myself....intamately."

Sara stopped and looked at Sidney, waiting for feedback on her two ideas.
 
Session 1- Sara Smith- wrap up

Sidney smiled into Sara’s curious eyes.

“Well, let’s remove the word ‘should’ from your language. That will automatically set you up for feeling like you’re not perfect just as you are. I’d love for you to have the attitude of wonder and excitement. And while I know a lot about psychology and intimacy, and I’ve tuned into what your body is telling me, I want you to always follow what brings you delight and pleasure. You don’t always need to know where you’re going in order to enjoy the ride, right? Think of these exercises, and this time to focus on self-loving acts, as rolling down the window and breathing in some fresh air. Maybe you’re streaming some music and singing along. You’re just enjoying the moment, not thinking about all the fun things and adventures ahead of you. So. . . with that in mind, I’m just going jot down some suggestions, but I want you to follow your own instincts and ideas as well. I’d like you to choose at least two of these activities and we’ll talk about how you felt, whether you enjoyed it, or felt some resistance on your return visit. Fear is not always a sign to stop. Often it is a sign to keep going, Sara. Okay, here are my suggestions,” Sidney said, as she read them from her handwritten notes one by one.

Sara Smith – Action steps to form an intimate relationship with YOU:

-Breast/bra liberation- Remove bra before sleep. Massage your breasts in front of a mirror for 3-5 minutes before bed and mentally appreciate the fact that you are healthy, beautiful, and unique.

-Before bed- Fantasize. What did you enjoy about our session? Imagine a man or woman touching you in a pleasurable way. Explore your body with your hands and see if you can recreate that pleasure.

-Sensual pleasures/nurturing- Create a sensual environment around you. Even if it’s just for one day, invite some beauty to surround you. Take a bubble or salt bath. Apply your favorite lotion. Wear a favorite or new outfit to bed. Or nothing. Have a nice candle and a flower or bouquet in your bedroom. Clean your room so that it feels like an oasis. You get the idea. You’re inviting sensuality into your life. Some ‘feel goods’, not ‘shoulds’.

-Novelty- Do something new. Buy something new. I don’t care what it is. It could even be renting, buying, or watching a soft porn. Or, taking a ride on a ferris wheel. Or, going to a new coffee shop.

-Yoga/Dancing—This will really help you to quiet your mind of all it’s unhelpful chatter until you can learn to be more aware of thoughts and ideas that don’t serve you. Yoga encourages you to simply breathe, stretch, and release tension, and then perhaps stretch a little further. It’s good for you on many levels. I’d encourage you to take a gentle yoga class, though. I would suggest a class at least twice a week, ideally three times. I find yoga very helpful, personally.

-General exercise for a sense of well-being

-Journal your thoughts and feelings

-Follow up with Dr. Davidson—work on releasing your past, and envision and discuss your dreams. What are your wildest dreams for yourself? What would be the equivalent of a physical orgasm?


“This should feel like a fun, but perhaps a challenging exercise. I promise that you will learn something about yourself. And with that knowledge, we’ll explore a bit further. As I said, if you have two ideas that differ, go with it. If you’d like to watch a recording of our session in one of my private rooms, just let me know and I’ll reserve that room for you. Sound good?” Sidney said, with a smile and an enthusiastic nod.

It was going to be a very sweet day when Sara would be able to let go of all her defense mechanisms and cry out in sexual ecstasy.
 
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