dear laurel

[gravyrug]

Dear Gravy,

Thanks for reading it, and for contributing!

Enjoy your nap! I'll take one, too.

Love,

Laurel

Dear Laurel,

I slept very nicely, thank you. Hope yours was as good.

Refreshedly yours,

Gravy

Dear gravy,

Did you just rumble? You know how I feel about the rumbling.

*smooch*squeeze*spin*squeal*

Yours in dearest friendship,

Farrah

I may have rumbled just a tad. It seemed appropriate to your other conversations.

<giantsqueezysmoochyhugs>

Yours in rumbly friendliness,

Gravy

 

[Noor]

Dear Good Witch,

I was confused the other day but it has cleared somewhat.

No thanks at all to my Green Lantern Peps dispenser.

Love to all and lust to some,

Noor

 

[lovetoread]

Dear Laurel,

I caught a tummy virus. I couldn't keep anything down, yet he was eating like there was no tomorrow.

It is still 93 degrees at 7:30 and it so humid. This part of Jersey isn't supposed to be like this.

Love,
LTR

 

[Sinny]

Dear Laurel,

I love Kyle's thread so much!

Love,
Bumper

 

[kotori]

Dear Laurel,

This place you created has changed my life. Irrevocably.

Thanks for all the fish.

kotori

 

[butters]

dear lots of people,

i'd give you all a voluptuous hug but it's just too damned hot.

maybe next time,

melted butters

 

[lovetoread]

Dear Butters,

I think you melted a bit on me.

Love,
LTR

 

[blackleggings]

Dear LTR,

The stomach flu is the worst. I hope you feel better. Sending zombies to wait on you as you recover. Try not to let them bite you.

Yours while also hating this humidity,
blackleggings

 

[SkAoUt]

Dear whomever got on board and co-opted this thread for nefarious means

Rad dude/tte.

Yours truly
Me

In other news Kyle hasn't been seen in these parts in 8 days. Kryptonite?

 

[Laurel]

Dear smiley!

Thank you for the warm doona!

Love,

Laurel

*

Dear pete,

Maybe. I was hoping it was slang for something else.

Love,

Laurel

*

Noor,

What's too messy?

Love,

Laurel

*

Dear gravy,

I slept well! That is my fourth special skill - sleeping. I sleep deeply, refreshingly, and have very vivid dreams.

So I have 4 special skills, actually: ordering food delivery, finding cool stuff to read on the Internet, dropping toast so that it lands butter-side-up on the tile, and sleeping.

That's my whole resume!

Love,

Laurel

*

Dear lovetoread,

That sounds like a recipe for disaster. Stay hydrated!

Love,

Laurel

*

Dear kotori,

If that's a good change, you're welcome.

If not, it's Manu's fault.

Love,

Laurel

*

Dear SKAoUt,

Someone should send out a search party. I worry about Kyle!

Love,

Laurel

*

Dear Kyle,

You okay, bro?

How's the wife and ferrets?

Things are good here.

Talk soon!

Love,

Laurel

 

[girlsmiley]

Dear Laurel,

Feel free to use my doona anytime.

Love,

Smiley.

P. S. What's for tea?

 

[SeaDaddy1]

Dear Noor,

I can't find those Finn Comfort Jamaica shoes in any store I've been to. Plus, I'm about $200 short.

Sincerely,

Jim.

 

[lovetoread]

Dear Laurel,

I know you are all knowing and deep, so I know you have a way of stopping this heat. Bewb sweat is never attractive.

Also, I have a minion with a fart gun. Oh how I love fart jokes.

Love,
LTR

 

[SeaDaddy1]

Dear LTR,

Q: What’s the definition of surprise?
A: A fart with a lump in it.


Q: Why did the fart cross the road?
A: It was stuck in the chicken’s pants.


Q: What is a fart?
A: A turd honking for clearance.

Sincerely,
Your fartner in crime.

 

[butters]

Dear Butters,

I think you melted a bit on me.

Love,
LTR

dear ltr,

sorry about that, but you're hot enough to melt anything even without the weather. get someone to lick it off?

pan-fried,
utterly butterly

 

[Sinny]

Dear Laurel,

There's a Mischka thread about music on page one screaming yer name. Get in thar!

Love,
Sinny

PS: Hi, Kyle!!!

 

[Noor]

Dear Noor,

I can't find those Finn Comfort Jamaica shoes in any store I've been to. Plus, I'm about $200 short.

Sincerely,

Jim.

Dear Jim,

Just tell round where you are and I would be happy to help you find them
If you are near me I found some for $140 on sale!

Thanks for trying,

Noor

 

[Noor]

Dear Laurel,

Until the temps get back into the 80's all chocolate is liquid so too messy for now.

Would honeydust be a good substitute? It's edible too!

Love,

Noor

 

[glynndah]

Dear Laurel,

Until the temps get back into the 80's all chocolate is liquid so too messy for now.

Would honeydust be a good substitute? It's edible too!

Love,

Noor

Dear Laurel,

Please say "yes".

Sincerely yours,

the I-wonder-if-it's-sticky good little witch.

 

[blackleggings]

Dear Laurel,

I think I'm ready for a new job. Is Lit hiring?

Yours while melting with everyone else in Virginia,
blackleggings

 

[Saint Peter]

Dear Laurel,

What the fuck is a doona?


hugs and kisses,
Pete

 

[thør]

Dear Laurel,

What the fuck is a doona?


hugs and kisses,
Pete

Ask Laurel's sister, Lorna.

 

[Saint Peter]

Ask Laurel's sister, Lorna.

Dinah-moe watched from the edge of the bed
With her lips just a-twitchin an her face gone red
Some drool rollin down
From the edge of her chin
While she spied the condition
Her sister was in
She quivered n quaked
An clutched at herself
While her sister made a joke
bout her mental health
till dinah-moe finally
Did give in
But I told her
All she really needed
Was some discipline...

 

[cjh]

Dear Laurel,

I just finished putting 45 pounds of brisket into the oven to cook at an insanely low temperature that won't, hopefully, tempt food poisoning.

It's for a friend's birthday.

Do you thing my vegan friends will now defriend me?

And, do you think Noor can be coaxed into bringing melted chocolate to top the desert?

Lowly and slowly,

cjh

 

[Sinny]

Dear Laurel,

I would like to bone cjh and his big brisket. Can you help me make that happen?

Thanks in advance!

Meaty Girl