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Dear Clowns

Dear Clowns:

Been dating a fab guy for almost 2 years...our anniversary is coming up soon...any good gift ideas....besides steak dinner and a bj?

Thanks :kiss:
 
flirtygirly said:
Dear Clowns:

Been dating a fab guy for almost 2 years...our anniversary is coming up soon...any good gift ideas....besides steak dinner and a bj?

Thanks :kiss:
Click to expand...

Dear gift giver,

I agree steak and blow jobs should be left to March 14th. What about lobster and Blow jobs? Hamburger and Blowjobs? Essentially whatever you decide throw in a blowjob with it. Hell if you give him Top Ramen and he eats it while you are blowing him it will be the best ramen ever. Plus the ironay will be you are both sucking on noodles at the same time.

If a blow job is out of order, I believe the 2 year anniversary gift is anal.
 
IhateClowns said:
Dear gift giver,

I agree steak and blow jobs should be left to March 14th. What about lobster and Blow jobs? Hamburger and Blowjobs? Essentially whatever you decide throw in a blowjob with it. Hell if you give him Top Ramen and he eats it while you are blowing him it will be the best ramen ever. Plus the ironay will be you are both sucking on noodles at the same time.

If a blow job is out of order, I believe the 2 year anniversary gift is anal.
Click to expand...

I am almost afraid to ask what is expected at 10 years. I mean, does it need to get exponentially better? And if so, how? Or is one anniversary the same as the one before after 5 years?
 
IhateClowns said:
Dear gift giver,

I agree steak and blow jobs should be left to March 14th. What about lobster and Blow jobs? Hamburger and Blowjobs? Essentially whatever you decide throw in a blowjob with it. Hell if you give him Top Ramen and he eats it while you are blowing him it will be the best ramen ever. Plus the ironay will be you are both sucking on noodles at the same time.

If a blow job is out of order, I believe the 2 year anniversary gift is anal.
Click to expand...

Thanks Clowns! I've got lots of Ramen, so it shall be noodles all around!!
 
Dear clowns, how come it's only the 22 year old or 60 year old men who message me on Plentyoffish?

signed don't wanna be yo momma or little girl.
 
Last edited:
msmaggie said:
Dear clowns, how come it's only the 22 year old or 60 year old men who message me on Plentyoffish?

signed don't wanna be yo momma or little girl.
Click to expand...

Dear age appropriate,

Plenty of fish huh? Why not join the masses here and find your one any only right here in our grand PG? There are some catches here and even though they are not monogamous in their current relationship by being on here I am sure they will be fr you.

As for the 20 and 60 year olds messaging you all I can say is you stretch through many generations. Your hotness and overall sensuality reaches no bounds. Embrace it. Fuck the 20 year olds and then give them lunch mOney on their way out te door. Then fuck the 60 year old and raid his medicine cabinet.

Seems like a win win to me.
 
IhateClowns said:
Dear age appropriate,

Plenty of fish huh? Why not join the masses here and find your one any only right here in our grand PG? There are some catches here and even though they are not monogamous in their current relationship by being on here I am sure they will be fr you.

As for the 20 and 60 year olds messaging you all I can say is you stretch through many generations. Your hotness and overall sensuality reaches no bounds. Embrace it. Fuck the 20 year olds and then give them lunch mOney on their way out te door. Then fuck the 60 year old and raid his medicine cabinet.

Seems like a win win to me.
Click to expand...

Thank you wise one. I never thought of it that way.

Off to answer some emails:devil:
 
IhateClowns said:
I am here to help and enlighten. Some call me a profit. Others a medium. Me? I just think I am full of shit.
Click to expand...

Dear IHC,

I'm having salacious thoughts about my fellow Litsters.
How can I stay 'professional' while playing on the threads?

Frustratingly-hornified Litster

(aka Jett)
 
Dear IHC,

I keep trying to provoke salacious thoughts from my fellow Litsters on the Playground, but most of them remain professional with me. How can I get them frustratingly hornified? ;)

Smartassed Doll

:D
 
Jett_73 said:
Dear IHC,

I'm having salacious thoughts about my fellow Litsters.
How can I stay 'professional' while playing on the threads?

Frustratingly-hornified Litster

(aka Jett)
Click to expand...

Dear Frustrated,

Of course you are. Looking at the AV you are sporting. I told you women would drop their panties as soon as you started using a pic of yourself as an AV.

I say act on those feelings you are having. Even if the women don't respond just continue sending them PM's. They like that. Tell them in explicit detail how mch you want them. What you are willing to do to and for them. Come on strong. Women like a strong man.

Just cyber fuck every woman on here. Oh yeah tell them that they are the only one as well. They love that. Otherwise if you don't they will think you are doing to others what you are doing with her.
 
IhateClowns said:
Dear Frustrated,

Of course you are. Looking at the AV you are sporting. I told you women would drop their panties as soon as you started using a pic of yourself as an AV.

I say act on those feelings you are having. Even if the women don't respond just continue sending them PM's. They like that. Tell them in explicit detail how mch you want them. What you are willing to do to and for them. Come on strong. Women like a strong man.

Just cyber fuck every woman on here. Oh yeah tell them that they are the only one as well. They love that. Otherwise if you don't they will think you are doing to others what you are doing with her.
Click to expand...

Dear IHC,

You mean there are guys on Lit who aren't monogamous about their cyber-fucking?!
:eek:
 
IhateClowns said:
Dear Frustrated,

Of course you are. Looking at the AV you are sporting. I told you women would drop their panties as soon as you started using a pic of yourself as an AV.

I say act on those feelings you are having. Even if the women don't respond just continue sending them PM's. They like that. Tell them in explicit detail how mch you want them. What you are willing to do to and for them. Come on strong. Women like a strong man.

Just cyber fuck every woman on here. Oh yeah tell them that they are the only one as well. They love that. Otherwise if you don't they will think you are doing to others what you are doing with her.
Click to expand...

*lightbulb*

You mean I should stop being polite and respectful?
Here I thought the ladies appreciated a bit of old-fashioned romance, charm and wit.
To think that all this time I've been mistaken and that I just have to behave like an animalistic fuck machine!
Correction, an animalistic fuck machine with the impression of having a dedicated, single-user programme function.
Well to hell then with good manners, intelligent conversation and subtle flirtation!
Thanks IHC, I'm off to buy me some extra ISP bandwidth, a HD webcam and a cock ring!

Grateful Litster
 
MollyDolly said:
Dear IHC,

I keep trying to provoke salacious thoughts from my fellow Litsters on the Playground, but most of them remain professional with me. How can I get them frustratingly hornified? ;)

Smartassed Doll

:D
Click to expand...

Dear Smart ass,

How do you provoke these thoughts? Are you blatant about it? Have you shown your tits yet? Until you do then you really arent trying. Give it a shot. I am sure many are willing and able once they see some areola.
 
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