Dating Advice

[PacificBlue]

I may be asking this in the wrong place but I'm going to give it a try anyway.

I have a guy friend, he wanted more and I said no. He said he understood but still wanted to hang out. I agreed but only as friends. Each and everytime we've gone somewhere he turns it to a sexual discussion, gets in my personal space, etc. When sex comes up, I change the topic. When he gets in my personal space, I step back and put space between us. I'm at the point where I feel I need to write off the possibility of friendship and need to just tell him so.

I'm frustrated with "dating" in general. There seems to be a rush to get into bed. Why is this? In my view, it is really difficult to get to know someone when the physical is thrown in because the hormones take over for awhile. It confuses the issue.

Is it unrealistic to expect a man to wait 3-6 months for sex? It isn't that I'm not interested in sex, I am. Very much so. I just want to be thinking with my head and not my hormones the next time I do get into bed with someone.

 

[Rubyfruit]

Hi PB. You need to dump the "friend." No matter what you say or do, he's not hearing you, and you're inadvertantly giving him hope. Not good for either one of you.

As far as finding men willing to wait, do you belong to a church? If not, why not join one and then join the adult singles group there.

Good luck!

 

[LukkyKnight]

Yeah, set him aside, you're not being unreasonable.

The thing is, dating means different things to different people. I've known at least one woman who saw dating as a synonym for sex, and she assumed any guy who asked her out was after some like soon.

The challenge is to find somebody who understands it the way you do.

 

[Problem Child]

Buy a sybian and a poster of John-Boy Walton, rigid penis straining against his faded overalls.

 

[Sillyman]

First of all, this guy probably wants to get in your pants more than anything else. I suggest not hanging out with him. He will keep making you uncomfortable.

I will also say waiting a few months to begin a sexual relationship is far from unrealistic. They need to think beyond wether this person would be a good piece of ass from the get go, and if someone can't seem to show an interest in you beyond that, you don't need them.

 

[Sillyman]

Buy a sybian and a poster of John-Boy Walton, rigid penis straining against his faded overalls.

Also sound advice.

 

[PacificBlue]

Thank you Ruby.

Why would I want to join a church?

 

[curious2c]

You think this may not be the place to ask, and here I am, the last person to get dating advice from, since I have been out of that for sooooo long.

My thoughts are...by all means, hold back the sex until you know someone well enough to go ahead and do that. You will still find out things about them, good or bad, but you will have a better understanding of them before you get too far involved.

Someone as special as you are deserves a good man. One who cares and can honor you. The best way for you to find him is to stick to your guns. Respect is earned.

Good luck to you Pacificblue.

 

[Sillyman]

Thank you Ruby.

Why would I want to join a church?

To get some and look spiritual while doing it. I reccomend the Unitarian Universalists.

 

[Problem Child]

To get some and look spiritual while doing it. I reccomend the Unitarian Universalists.

I heard Mormons get more pussy.

 

[PacificBlue]

Thank you for the feedback.

 

[Sillyman]

I heard Mormons get more pussy.

Not anymore, and the restrictions with Mormonism are hell. I know UUS who don't believe in hell, don't believe in God, and don't even go to church. It's pretty freaking lax.

 

[Problem Child]

Not anymore, and the restrictions with Mormonism are hell. I know UUS who don't believe in hell, don't believe in God, and don't even go to church. It's pretty freaking lax.

What the fuck do they worship, George Foreman grills?

 

[Rubyfruit]

Thank you Ruby.

Why would I want to join a church?

No problem, PB.

I would think that men who go to church might lean to a more conservative approach to dating, plus, as I recall from my youth camp days, there's tons of flirting going on.

On the other hand, I am thinking of selling my sybian...

 

[kotori]

What the fuck do they worship, George Foreman grills?

Something close. The local UUC here is dedicated to Thomas Jefferson.

"John Boy"? Dude, this Southern Man thing isn't going well.

 

[Angel]

No problem, PB.

I would think that men who go to church might lean to a more conservative approach to dating, plus, as I recall from my youth camp days, there's tons of flirting going on.

On the other hand, I am thinking of selling my sybian...

How about I come over and you show me how to use it.

 

[Problem Child]

"John Boy"? Dude, this Southern Man thing isn't going well.

NASCAR bores me. I fucking hate the color orange. I have no desire to park a bass boat in my front yard. Skipping over the 35 christian tv shows on cable is annoying as fuck.

Help.

 

[LukkyKnight]

How about I come over and you show me how to use it?

Well just oh my my my my

 

[Lancecastor]

Is it unrealistic to expect a man to wait 3-6 months for sex? It isn't that I'm not interested in sex, I am. Very much so. I just want to be thinking with my head and not my hormones the next time I do get into bed with someone.

Ha! 3-6 months? Hahahahahahahahahaha!

Thinking with your head when you get into bed?!

Hahahahahahahaha!

You've gone through this at least once a month for the year I've been posting here, which means you've teased and discarded 12-15 men.

The problem, my dear, is not Them...it's You. You. You, you, you. You. Did I mention it could be about...You?

Go get a few shots of therapy.

Or a grrlfriend.

Watch Dr. Phil.

Buy a book.

Something....but get your head straight. Meanwhile, you should tattoo a No Dating sign on your ass.

Grow up, grrl. This isn't dress rehearsal at the Princess Barbie Spring Collection...it's your life.

 

[Rubyfruit]

How about I come over and you show me how to use it.

Maybe I'd get more for it if I made an instructional video to go with it.

 

[Calamity Jane]

NASCAR bores me. I fucking hate the color orange. I have no desire to park a bass boat in my front yard. Skipping over the 35 christian tv shows on cable is annoying as fuck.

Help.

Wow. That's pretty bad. In Missouri, we park our boats in the back yard.

 

[Problem Child]

Wow. That's pretty bad. In Missouri, we park our boats in the back yard.

The backyards around here are full of rusting major appliances and '79 TransAms with no wheels. On cinder blocks.

 

[Calamity Jane]

Stop it PC! You're scaring me.

PB ~ My advice is to ditch the 'friend'. I can't really help with the sex angle though. I cannot comprehend waiting 3-6 months before I slept with someone.