Custody Question

[catalina_francisco]

Hey Catalina...I've been seriously considering not putting his name on the birth certificate. It's just such a hard decision to make. In the end I think that is most likely what I will do. I really don't want a man who told me I'd have all the support he could give me if I chose to abort my child but that if I chose to keep her then "your mistakes are your own", to be a part of my childs life. The only reason I'm even considering trying to get support from him is because of the way the price of things here is going out of control and Michigan's depressed economy.

In the end I keep coming back to the most likely scenario probably being me sucking up my pride and moving home with one of my folks for a year or two so I can go back to school and get my RN which would give me a high enough salary that there would be no need for him to be in my life at all.

You can always tell the child who their father is when they are old enough, and if they wish to know. It is never an easy decision, but seems he is not big on responsibility and possibly if you made his life difficult by naming him and claiming child support, he might choose to retaliate by making your life difficult for the next 18 or so years. You also would not want to be in the position of being dependent on someone like that either.

Catalina

 

[callinectes]

You need to read this publication I found at the Michigan DHS website.

http://www.courts.michigan.gov/scao/resources/publications/manuals/focb/custodyguideline.pdf


Page 12 talks about moving..there are some situations in which the 100 mile rule does not apply.

Here is a link to the section of the DHS website dealing with child support/custody matters.

http://www.michigan.gov/dhs/0,1607,7-124-5453_5528---,00.html


PS. besy of luck and many hugs!

 

[caela]

Some very interesting reading there Callinectes! Thank you!

Catalina...you're right, I really don't want to tie my life or my child's to his, it's just hard to see how not to right now.

 

[graceanne]

Just a note - it's a real pain in the ass (and expensive) to enforce that rule AFTER the parent and child have left. My mom moved me and my sister all over the united states after our parents divorced, and while technically that wasn't allowed, my dad did not choose to make a fuss about it - most dead beat dad's won't.

 

[FurryFury]

Just a note - it's a real pain in the ass (and expensive) to enforce that rule AFTER the parent and child have left. My mom moved me and my sister all over the united states after our parents divorced, and while technically that wasn't allowed, my dad did not choose to make a fuss about it - most dead beat dad's won't.

But power freaks will and there are a LOT of those.

 

[graceanne]

But power freaks will and there are a LOT of those.

Oh, I know. The question you have to ask is if it's worth the fight and risk. And, also, how much you know your ex and all that. My mother knew that my dad wouldn't do shit. He's too lazy.