curious

[butters69]

i am curious......and been curious for a long time.

 

[mystic_maiden32]

about?

 

[butters69]

ihave

i have always had the the urges to be with a woman for as long as could remember but never had the courage to act on it. i am now married and stiil fighting these urges even more. i know that i am deny part of be but i don't know what to do.

 

[Street Mystic]

Re: ihave

i have always had the the urges to be with a woman for as long as could remember but never had the courage to act on it. i am now married and stiil fighting these urges even more. i know that i am deny part of be but i don't know what to do.

i dunno... what's your husband's take on lesbians?

a *lot* of guys dig girl/girl action, and there probably isn't an "open-minded" guy out there who hasn't suggested the possibility of a FFM threesome to his girlfriend/wife at one point or another. (funny, but guys who'd cringe and vomit at even the mention of sucking another guy's cock are usually shocked that porn may be wrong and that some straight women have the same reaction to eating pussy...)

just about every hardcore porno movie has at least one obligatory girl-girl scene in it, maybe you could rent one and watch it together to at least open up discussion on the subject.

if your husband isn't that sexually open or is one of those psycho anti-lesbian folks, then maybe you need to explore alternate avenues to at least satisfy your curiousity. there are numerous problems with extra-marital adventures though, especially those of a secretive homosexual nature, not least of which is that they could destroy your marriage and your life if found out.

a friend of mine is only just now on speaking terms with her own family after she left her husband for another woman, and it took a lot of expensive lawyering for her to get conservative judges to admit that maybe the kids were better off with the gainfully employed lesbian than the jackass deadbeat heterosexual she was married to...

 

[Etoile]

Re: ihave

i have always had the the urges to be with a woman for as long as could remember but never had the courage to act on it. i am now married and stiil fighting these urges even more. i know that i am deny part of be but i don't know what to do.

If you want to remain faithful to your husband, then you won't be sleeping with any women. Not behind his back, anyway. I'm a firm believer in the notion that "same-sex cheating is still cheating," though I know plenty of people who feel it's okay to fool around with their own gender without telling their opposite-gender spouse.

However, that doesn't mean you can't talk about this with your husband. If he's not closed-minded, he'll listen to you. Let him know that you're interested in women, and see how he responds. He may be into it, he may want to have a threesome with you and another woman, he may want to let you try another woman without him there, he may want to talk to you more about this after you've given it a try. But if it's truly important to you, you should definitely talk about this with him.

You mention denying part of who you are, by the way. Are you denying it because you're married, or because you believe same-sex relationships are wrong?

 

[CJontherocks]

i have always had the the urges to be with a woman for as long as could remember but never had the courage to act on it. i am now married and stiil fighting these urges even more. i know that i am deny part of be but i don't know what to do.

NOTE: I originally wrote this with the assumption you were considering your husband to be a part of this. My assumptions often lead me astray... sorry, if that's not the case. I was going to change my post to better fit your quandary as you described it, but the fact is, you are married. Your husband is a part of it.

My wife and I used to play with the idea in the bedroom. She would tell me in great detail how she wanted to have another woman with us. I, of course, loved it... totally did it for me, thinking of her and another girl. (I often wondered if she ever thought of me and another guy... but that's another thread). A couple that lived near us were totally into swapping/group sex, and we often fantasized about it with each other (except he was never discussed).

Then once during our lovemaking after I returned from a trip, she told me she had been with another woman. She began telling me of the experience, thinking it would turn me on. When I responded poorly, she came clean (I think) and told me it wasn't true... she only said it because she thought I would get off on it. But I really didn't like it. It was like a betrayal of sorts. Like cheating. It's truly not that I only wanted to be in the middle of two chicks. I just wanted to see her with another woman; help her female lover bring her orgasm after orgasm at the very most... whew!... still does it for me. We finally did make this fantasy come true years later, but again... another thread.

So... if you are going to have sex with someone you're not married to, I suggest you be honest. You can work up to it. Ask him if he's ever thought of it. Ask him if he'd like it. And if he responds well, then tell him it's something you've been considering. If it's just for you, you should tell him up front if he's either not invited, or not allowed to touch her. I've never met a man who didn't fantasize about two women together, though I guess there's probably one out there somewhere. But if you open the door to a third party, he may think it's a two way street and you should be ready to deal with that if it's not okay with you.

And be prepared for him to bring one of the guys home to have a little fun with also... I'm just saying, stranger things have happened (ahem).