Creative Plagairism: a Cut & Paste Challenge

[cloudy]

We always knew we loved each other. Eventually it became obvious. All those things you said: You look so beautiful. I'll cook for you. I don't watch TV; the remote is yours. I could teach you so much, honey. Are you able to stay awhile?

Exactly, and succinctly put, I'm the world's happiest, fuzziest person. I can fart in bed, I can roll on the floor covered in dog hair, lay around and watch porn when I want to. Apart from anything else, I love you.

Yes. The cute guy down at the hardware store is a sexy beast. I had the offer of a free room for 10 days, but you don't have to worry I'm looking for someone to kiss. I don't fantasize about other guys. You have a lot to offer a woman. Your hands know just what spots like to be played with.

"What the hell do you think you are doing with my wife? Get the fuck away!"​

I know what you were saying, "To kiss you is my job." But I secretly love a lil' bit of jealousy. It's foreplay. After 11 years of marriage, you take your chances.

"Freebies are rare."​

Are you saying I have to pay? But it's already been done! It turned into an evening of spankings in a tub of hot water. I had to know exactly what I had done wrong in order to apologise.

"That's not the same thing."​

oh i'm sorry
my bad

Come back. I think I'm losing my mind. The bed is damn cold. As long as you come home to me, you can eat cereal at 10 pm, for dinner, if you want to.




Thanks to nearly everyone who posted in Scheherazade's "Advantages of Being Single" thread!

Absolutely brilliant!!!

 

[LadyJeanne]

Absolutely brilliant!!!

You and Dran gave me some of the best lines.

 

[Guest]

You and Dran gave me some of the best lines.

AHEM!
LOl

 

[LadyJeanne]

AHEM!
LOl

oh i'm sorry
my bad

 

[Guest]

oh i'm sorry
my bad

you do make me laugh. loved it, btw.

 

[LadyJeanne]

you do make me laugh. loved it, btw.

*curtsy*

Your Knightress of Profligacy is always at your service.

 

[Guest]

*curtsy*

Your Knightress of Profligacy is always at your service.

DAMN... and
you have the memory to boot!

 

[LadyJeanne]

DAMN... and
you have the memory to boot!

How could I forget? The knightressing ceremony was the only time I've ever been caressed by a 12" vibrating sceptor.

 

[shereads]

Cut & Paste Salutes "Do You Smell That?"

For soup, I use just eight cats. Sixteen cats is too much and affects my ability to recognize the taste of ketchup. The tissue in the joint has "phantom smells." Strangely enough, the nose of a cat has the flavor of Bertie Bott's Every-Flavor Beans.

I would share, but it looks just awful and could send other people into a panic. Blindfolded, it tastes FANTASTIC. There's more than enough to go around!

 

[LadyJeanne]

For soup, I use just eight cats. Sixteen cats is too much and affects my ability to recognize the taste of ketchup. The tissue in the joint has "phantom smells." Strangely enough, the nose of a cat has the flavor of Bertie Bott's Every-Flavor Beans.

I would share, but it looks just awful and could send other people into a panic. Blindfolded, it tastes FANTASTIC. There's more than enough to go around!

Finally found a good use for that emoticon.

 

[NoJo]

DAMN... and
you have the memory to boot!

I've got a cat to boot.

 

[CharleyH]

LOL. Ok, NOW I recall why it took me so long to write my sumbmission for the Literotica Olympics (please bear this obvious promo in mind for upcoming yearly award type vote thingies. Link to: Making fun of the AH )

Nonetheless, my addition, which is the best I can do on only two coffee's in the midst of a procrastinating, Saturday morning.

A question regarding the AH by Neonlyte, Amicus, The Bullet, Sub Joe, Virtual Burlesque, Vella_ms.

Totally off the cuff and backed by absolutely nothing, this is a magical place; it has richness beyond measure and stirs memories of a once great power. Such openness is rare and this motive, accurate as it is, a valid reason for accidentally unearthed treasures. You can imagine the emissaries of the Pope delivering the balls, yes, that's obvious. If not for the penis and its need to find, attract, overpower and defend a herd of vaginas, would there be any Literotica?

 

[Guest]

LOL. Ok, NOW I recall why it took me so long to write my sumbmission for the Literotica Olympics (please bear this obvious promo in mind for upcoming yearly award type vote thingies. Link to: Making fun of the AH )

Nonetheless, my addition, which is the best I can do on only two coffee's in the midst of a procrastinating, Saturday morning.

A question regarding the AH by Neonlyte, Amicus, The Bullet, Sub Joe, Virtual Burlesque, Vella_ms.

Totally off the cuff and backed by absolutely nothing, this is a magical place; it has richness beyond measure and stirs memories of a once great power. Such openness is rare and this motive, accurate as it is, a valid reason for accidentally unearthed treasures. You can imagine the emissaries of the Pope delivering the balls, yes, that's obvious. If not for the penis and its need to find, attract, overpower and defend a herd of vaginas, would there be any Literotica?

oh my! look who ive been grouped with... the AH superpowers!
Charlie, youre kooky.. i love that in a woman. *meow baby, meow*

 

[CharleyH]

oh my! look who ive been grouped with... the AH superpowers!
Charlie, youre kooky.. i love that in a woman. *meow baby, meow*

I'd have added the gay element, but was procrastinating on that, too, and then went onto another post.

 

[shereads]

A question regarding the AH[/b] by Neonlyte, Amicus, The Bullet, Sub Joe, Virtual Burlesque, Vella_ms.

The penis part is mine:

If not for the penis and its need to find, attract, overpower and defend a herd of vaginas

My attorneys will be touch.

 

[shereads]

Who else is tempted to combine some amicus posts and some joe wordsworth posts into one, but doesn't think they'd accept it as a compliment?

 

[CharleyH]

The penis part is mine: My attorneys will be touch.

I have OJ's team on my side!

 

[Guest]

I have OJ's team on my side!

perhaps but i have your glove

 

[CharleyH]

perhaps but i have your glove

ROFL, touche'.

 

[Guest]

Compliments of the Lent thread:

He insists on having fish, no matter what. He has a low amusement level, sort of like a cat with a ball of yarn. When I was a kid my mom told me my goldfish ran away from home, will you look in your belly button and see if Sharky is in there? Get out the extra garlic and set another place. inside are bodies of hamsters. Damn! No leftovers!

 

[TheEarl]

We always knew we loved each other. Eventually it became obvious. All those things you said: You look so beautiful. I'll cook for you. I don't watch TV; the remote is yours. I could teach you so much, honey. Are you able to stay awhile?

Exactly, and succinctly put, I'm the world's happiest, fuzziest person. I can fart in bed, I can roll on the floor covered in dog hair, lay around and watch porn when I want to. Apart from anything else, I love you.

Yes. The cute guy down at the hardware store is a sexy beast. I had the offer of a free room for 10 days, but you don't have to worry I'm looking for someone to kiss. I don't fantasize about other guys. You have a lot to offer a woman. Your hands know just what spots like to be played with.

"What the hell do you think you are doing with my wife? Get the fuck away!"​

I know what you were saying, "To kiss you is my job." But I secretly love a lil' bit of jealousy. It's foreplay. After 11 years of marriage, you take your chances.

"Freebies are rare."​

Are you saying I have to pay? But it's already been done! It turned into an evening of spankings in a tub of hot water. I had to know exactly what I had done wrong in order to apologise.

"That's not the same thing."​

oh i'm sorry
my bad

Come back. I think I'm losing my mind. The bed is damn cold. As long as you come home to me, you can eat cereal at 10 pm, for dinner, if you want to.




Thanks to nearly everyone who posted in Scheherazade's "Advantages of Being Single" thread!

<sniggers> Superlative.

The Earl

 

[shereads]

Poetry, somewhat Asian; stark, yet fuzzy:

Compliments of the Lent thread:

Get out the extra garlic and set another place. inside are bodies of hamsters. Damn! No leftovers!

 

[Guest]

Poetry, somewhat Asian; stark, yet fuzzy:

The copy of Darwin's Origin of Species the soldier carried next to his heart stopped the oncoming machine-gun bullet.

-from "A winter's tale" by Margaret Atwood

 

[LadyJeanne]

<sniggers> Superlative.

The Earl

 

[CharleyH]

The penis part is mine

Slow on the take today. Procrastinating on everything. I like your penis parts, Sher. How big did you say?