Couldnt make him cum

[VirginDebs]

Hey,
I spent the night (and all of the next day) with a close friend of mine, with the intention of us having sex and him taking my virginity.
We didnt go that far, but we did do a lot of foreplay. He made me cum so many times throughout the time we spent together, he used his hands and mouth/tongue and we did 69 aswell.
I gave him a few hand jobs and blow jobs and he said they were amazing...but each time he just did not cum.
He said he hadnt had any sexual activity for 5years so would that be the problem? Although he said he does wank off regularly so I just cant understand it.
Am I the one doing wrong? Surely he'd tell me if it wasnt enjoyable? He said it was nice...

 

[phoenix1224]

I don't think that you're doing anything wrong.

I personally have NEVER been able to cum from a woman giving me a bj... And it's VERY rare that I do from a handjob... A lot of guys are that way.

He just may be one of those guys that CAN'T... So, if he's not making a big deal out of it, then you shouldn't either.

 

[Nightbird]

I'm just guessing here but I'd say this is probably just a nervous kinda thing. Was he a virgin too?

Maybe give it some time and patience, sometimes guys get performance anxiety or worried about hurting their partner and the plumbing doesn't always work.

 

[VirginDebs]

Nah hes 44 this year and has a son (hes divorced though!) so I doubt it was anything like that.
When we 69'd I did taste some precum, but he still never actually came.
I've gave 1 guy a blowjob before and he came quite quickly.

 

[MiloDRemix]

According to your profile you just turned 18? I kind of wonder why you're losing your virginity to a 44 year old friend. I'm not saying that in any sort of mean way or saying that it's wrong, just wondering if you really like this guy or if that even matters to you to lose your virginity to someone that you love? I'm always interested in the emotional aspect of love making.

Anyhow. I'm sure that you weren't doing anything wrong and that if he said it was nice, he meant it. Some guys just don't get off from oral or handjobs, as has already been said. Plus, there probably was some anxiety/pressure on his part because of the fact that you are a virgin. Lots of guys (myself included) would feel a bit more nervous and careful around a girl who was still a virgin.

If it bothers you and you plan on losing your virginity to this guy, you should be able to talk to him about why he didn't cum. Ask him if there's anything he'd like you to do differently and what-not. Only he would know.

 

[SweetErika]

Maybe he was nervous about your virginity. Another likely culprit could be his regular masturbation though...it's easy to get used to certain feelings and a sort of routine during masturbation, and that can cause problems when with someone else. Ask him to hold off masturbating for a few days before you get together next, and then to give you lots of instruction and feedback on what feels best.

 

[VirginDebs]

Thanks for everyones help. I just wasnt sure how to approach the subject...I dont want him to feel he may have a problem or anything!

MiloD...I had a discussion for a few days before I went round, with people on 'The Playground' forum about him taking my virginity. Hes a great friend and was very shocked that an 18year old wanted to sleep with him. He means a lot to me and I feel more attached to him since the weekend. I trust he wouldnt hurt me intentionally, and I know he'll be careful.

 

[LadyJeanne]

Thanks for everyones help. I just wasnt sure how to approach the subject...I dont want him to feel he may have a problem or anything!

MiloD...I had a discussion for a few days before I went round, with people on 'The Playground' forum about him taking my virginity. Hes a great friend and was very shocked that an 18year old wanted to sleep with him. He means a lot to me and I feel more attached to him since the weekend. I trust he wouldnt hurt me intentionally, and I know he'll be careful.

It's likely you'll feel even more attached and emotional after you have sex, so please think carefully about whether you want to feel that way.

And check out this thread too - lots of things to consider before losing your virginity.

Losing Virginity to a Friend

 

[VirginDebs]

thanks i read that thread but I still want to. we tried 3times Sat night/Sun morning n each time we got a bit further but more painful so we stopped

 

[Ezzy]

thanks i read that thread but I still want to. we tried 3times Sat night/Sun morning n each time we got a bit further but more painful so we stopped

If you want to see him cum, ask him to show you how he likes it, and ask him to go all the way through to a climax, you can do the same along with him, sat infront to give him something to look at if he wants.

If it gets painful, then unless he likes pain in his sex, he won't be able to cum anyway.

 

[VirginDebs]

nah I meant painful for me...being a virgin n all!

 

[MiloDRemix]

Why do you want to lose your virginity exactly? Just to experience sex or because you love this guy or...?

 

[indigoboy]

I don't think that you're doing anything wrong.

I personally have NEVER been able to cum from a woman giving me a bj... And it's VERY rare that I do from a handjob... A lot of guys are that way.

He just may be one of those guys that CAN'T... So, if he's not making a big deal out of it, then you shouldn't either.

I'm with this guy. It takes me a long ass time to cum from a BJ or HJ. Sometimes it even takes me a long time to cum during sex. My wife usually gets off a few times before I do. But she doesn't complain.

 

[VirginDebs]

Spoke 2 him about this last night and he did say he has a very hard problem with cumming during anything except for wanking.
So in the end he wanked himself off (even that took a few times, and took about half an hour in the end) and came in my mouth!

 

[DarkWizard?]

How old he is, it seems a little off.

 

[VirginDebs]

hes 43...44 in May