could someone please straighten me out?!

[paganangel]

the problem is this, where a life partner is concerned, i'm no catch. i'm not that bad, but i'm fantastically mediocre.

the problem is, i still wont settle.

there's a girl my mind keeps comming back to. she has one flaw and i can't get past it. sometimes i feel i'm right and sometimes i feel i'm being superficial.

i just couldn't go to bed with this girl and wake up every morning without at least thinking about this.

sooo.... let her rip.

 

[penguindance]

 

[MissTaken]

Well, what is the one flaw?

That would give us some starting point by which to fix you all up.

 

[Trail48]

Is it the big wart with the one hair sticking out of it?

 

[amelia]

i just couldn't go to bed with this girl and wake up every morning without at least thinking about this.

if you love someone, you accept them for who they are. (cliche'? yeah..but this is free advice)

 

[tyme]

depends on the flaw....but if you really think you could not get over what ever it is then keep waiting the right one willcome along.

 

[Samuari]

I recomend that you get a brown paper sack and get with your life.

 

[paganangel]

i was afraid of this 'cause i know eveyone's gonna jump all over me. still, i promised myself if someone asked (i oped against hope they wouldn't) i'd answer.

the problem? she's big. she lost 90 lbs a year ago, but she is still big. to boot, and this is the real problem, because of the previous weight loss, she's all stretch marks and loose skin.

 

[MissTaken]

Hmmm but how do you feel about her as a person?

If you don't find big attractive and you dont' care for her enough to not be comfortable with her physique, it is time to get back to the drawing board.

I wouldn't say your "standards" are a problem, but your tastes don't run her way.

 

[Kitte]

i was afraid of this 'cause i know eveyone's gonna jump all over me. still, i promised myself if someone asked (i oped against hope they wouldn't) i'd answer.

the problem? she's big. she lost 90 lbs a year ago, but she is still big. to boot, and this is the real problem, because of the previous weight loss, she's all stretch marks and loose skin.

Coming from a big girl...if you have issue with it...dont even get involved. Why you ask? Because she deserves someone who is going to love and accept her for who she is. And hey Im not gonna say your an ass for thinking like that...what business is it of mine....but ya know what you are missing out by excluding people based on weight but everyone has their own preferances and you are entitled to yours.

 

[fingers_larue]

wah wah wah

Man are you hung up on size or what. She was real big when you first met her now she's just big and that could be a step in the right direction....or maybe your just to damn skinny. Wonder what she would say about you, let her read this thread and post a reply. If that happened you might hear some news about you that would rock your world.

 

[intrigued]

A couple things here, cause I'm a little confused.

Isn't there a Mr. PCG? I was thinking I read that somewhere, and it's only a bit confusing because you used the words "life partner".

What is it about her that you can't get out of your mind?

 

[Summery]

You know, I am not going to jump all over you PA. Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes, both inside and out. You have a right not to find her body an attractive quality. I am curious your answer to MissT's question, as to what you think of her overall as a person. She doesn't obviously match your tastes. We all have preferences to some degree. And, I am of the opinion, that if and when you truly love someone, you accept them completely. The whole package. This is all I can really say, not really knowing the nature of your relationship with this woman.

 

[RastaPope]

What is it about her that you can't get out of your mind?

Maybe she keeps stealing his fries?

 

[paganangel]

#1, she wasn't real big when we met.
2. i'm not hung up, i like big girls...but the skin. my shrink suggested i suggest surgery. i was aghast at the thought.
3. from all of this i've begun to ask myself, and now all of you a question, isn't it both unrealistic and ovely romantic to think that one can make up for the other?

 

[Summery]

A couple things here, cause I'm a little confused.

Isn't there a Mr. PCG? I was thinking I read that somewhere, and it's only a bit confusing because you used the words "life partner".

What is it about her that you can't get out of your mind?

Are you sure you aren't confusing pagancowgirl and paganangel.

 

[paganangel]

A couple things here, cause I'm a little confused.

Isn't there a Mr. PCG? I was thinking I read that somewhere, and it's only a bit confusing because you used the words "life partner".

What is it about her that you can't get out of your mind?

pcg? i belive u have me confuse with a certain missouri mama. (one i'd probably give it all up for.)

 

[intrigued]

Are you sure you aren't confusing pagancowgirl and paganangel.

That's it.

*dies*

 

[MissTaken]

#1, she wasn't real big when we met.
2. i'm not hung up, i like big girls...but the skin. my shrink suggested i suggest surgery. i was aghast at the thought.
3. from all of this i've begun to ask myself, and now all of you a question, isn't it both unrealistic and ovely romantic to think that one can make up for the other?

Well, you could ask her if she had considered surgery?

Without making it sound terrible.

No one is flaming you, PA.

Soemtiems, with flaws, a good measure of how much the "flaw" should impact your relationship is this:

Is it a temporary or permenant flaw?

What can be done about it?

Can you help her to get it done and still leave her feeling loved, not judged?

 

[Trail48]

#1, she wasn't real big when we met.
2. i'm not hung up, i like big girls...but the skin. my shrink suggested i suggest surgery. i was aghast at the thought.
3. from all of this i've begun to ask myself, and now all of you a question, isn't it both unrealistic and ovely romantic to think that one can make up for the other?

The fact is you like what you like. If this lady doesn't have what you prefer in a woman, why not enjoy her friendship while making it clear that the relationship will not go further than this?

 

[intrigued]

Maybe she keeps stealing his fries?

uh oh.

 

[Aphrodisiac]

It seems you can not see past her weight or her "flaw" as you say ... then maybe you should just leave her alone and simply be her friend , rather then give her the illusion that you might consider her something else , when deep down you don't ...

It would easier that way, feelings won't get hurt.

 

[paganangel]

miss t,

if i ever get uppity wqith you remind me of this and how much i dig on you.

now then, she really doesn't seem to have one other thing wrong with her that i can't get past. she's caring and honest. she's a marvelous cook. (shut up rasta) she's beautiful. she knows almost everything about me and it's ok. she is realistic. she sems trustworthy but i'm a really bad judge on this.

oh look, she's pmming me now.

 

[Cheyenne]

She's from LIT and you have us analyzing her on the bb?

 

[paganangel]

i wouldn'tdo that chey