Cookie's Couch...
- Thread starter cookiejar
- Start date
CharlotteNCguy
Always in the Mood
- Joined
- Feb 26, 2002
- Posts
- 19,775
rosylady said:Hi CNC, my day was okay. I'm scared to see Dr. Cookie.
I am scared to. I forgot to take my medication
CharlotteNCguy
Always in the Mood
- Joined
- Feb 26, 2002
- Posts
- 19,775
cookiejar said:
That what I was afraid of... A GUIL-O-BOX - I had a girlfriend who had one of those.
biggbear8
heart and soul
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2002
- Posts
- 14,049
A man goes to a psychiatrist, and they decide to start with
a Rorschach test. He's shown the first picture and sees a
man and a woman making love at the beach. In the second,
a man and a woman making love in a hottub. The third has
a man and a woman making love in a park. In all of the
pictures, the man sees a couple making love.
After the test, the psychiatrist looks over his notes and
says, "You seem to have a preoccupation with sex."
The man replies, "You're the one with the dirty pictures."
a Rorschach test. He's shown the first picture and sees a
man and a woman making love at the beach. In the second,
a man and a woman making love in a hottub. The third has
a man and a woman making love in a park. In all of the
pictures, the man sees a couple making love.
After the test, the psychiatrist looks over his notes and
says, "You seem to have a preoccupation with sex."
The man replies, "You're the one with the dirty pictures."
biggbear8
heart and soul
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2002
- Posts
- 14,049
A group of psychiatrists go to tour an insane asylum that is known for their progressive rehabilitation methods. They begin by visiting some of the patients.
The first patient they visit is a young woman practicing ballet. One of the psychiatrist asks, "What are you doing?" She replies, "I'm studying ballet so when I get out of here I can possibly join a troupe and be a productive member of society."
The next person was a man reading a book with a pile of books next to him. The same question asked to him, "What are you doing?" "I'm studying biology, chemistry, etc. So I can enter medical school when I get out."
Room after room, they witnessed the incredible success and attitudes of the patients. Until they finally reached a room the asylums director was reluctant to open. Finally, he was persuaded to open it. Inside was a man with his penis in a jar of peanuts.
"My God!" said the psychiatrist, "what are you doing?"
The man replied: "I'm fucking nuts and I'm never getting out of here"
The first patient they visit is a young woman practicing ballet. One of the psychiatrist asks, "What are you doing?" She replies, "I'm studying ballet so when I get out of here I can possibly join a troupe and be a productive member of society."
The next person was a man reading a book with a pile of books next to him. The same question asked to him, "What are you doing?" "I'm studying biology, chemistry, etc. So I can enter medical school when I get out."
Room after room, they witnessed the incredible success and attitudes of the patients. Until they finally reached a room the asylums director was reluctant to open. Finally, he was persuaded to open it. Inside was a man with his penis in a jar of peanuts.
"My God!" said the psychiatrist, "what are you doing?"
The man replied: "I'm fucking nuts and I'm never getting out of here"
biggbear8
heart and soul
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2002
- Posts
- 14,049
A mature woman was in with her priest to get some counseling for her upcoming fourth
wedding.
"How am I going to tell my husband that I am still a virgin?"
"You have been a married woman for many years. Surely that cannot be."
"Well," she said, "my first husband was a psychologist, and all he wanted to do
was talk, and the next one was in construction and he always said he'd get to
it tomorrow. The last one was a gynecologist and all he did was look. But this
time, father, I'm marrying a lawyer and I'm sure I'm going to get screwed."
wedding.
"How am I going to tell my husband that I am still a virgin?"
"You have been a married woman for many years. Surely that cannot be."
"Well," she said, "my first husband was a psychologist, and all he wanted to do
was talk, and the next one was in construction and he always said he'd get to
it tomorrow. The last one was a gynecologist and all he did was look. But this
time, father, I'm marrying a lawyer and I'm sure I'm going to get screwed."
biggbear8
heart and soul
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2002
- Posts
- 14,049
A psychiatrist visited a California mental institution and asked a patient,
"How did you get here? What was the nature of your illness?" He got this
reply...
"Well, it all started when I got married and I guess I should never have
done it. I got hitched to a widow with a grown daughter who then became my
stepdaughter. My daddy came to visit us, fell in love with my lovely
stepdaughter, then married her. And so my stepdaughter was now my stepmother.
Soon, my wife had a son who was, of course, my daddy's brother-in-law since he
is the half-brother of my stepdaughter, who is now, of course, my daddy's wife.
So, as I told you, when my stepdaughter married my daddy, she was at once my
stepmother! Now, since my new son is brother to my stepmother, he also became
my uncle. As you know, my wife is my step-grandmother since she is my
stepmother's mother. Don't forget that my stepmother is my stepdaughter.
Remember, too, that I am my wife's grandson. But hold on just a few minutes
more. You see, since I'm married to my step-grandmother, I am not only the
wife's grandson and her hubby, but I am also my own grandfather. Now can you
understand how I got put in this place?"
"How did you get here? What was the nature of your illness?" He got this
reply...
"Well, it all started when I got married and I guess I should never have
done it. I got hitched to a widow with a grown daughter who then became my
stepdaughter. My daddy came to visit us, fell in love with my lovely
stepdaughter, then married her. And so my stepdaughter was now my stepmother.
Soon, my wife had a son who was, of course, my daddy's brother-in-law since he
is the half-brother of my stepdaughter, who is now, of course, my daddy's wife.
So, as I told you, when my stepdaughter married my daddy, she was at once my
stepmother! Now, since my new son is brother to my stepmother, he also became
my uncle. As you know, my wife is my step-grandmother since she is my
stepmother's mother. Don't forget that my stepmother is my stepdaughter.
Remember, too, that I am my wife's grandson. But hold on just a few minutes
more. You see, since I'm married to my step-grandmother, I am not only the
wife's grandson and her hubby, but I am also my own grandfather. Now can you
understand how I got put in this place?"
~Elizabeth~
His horny lil devil
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2002
- Posts
- 44,369
Mornin Doc, hope you have a great day.
Bear, the jokes are hilarious! A laugh first thing in the morning is great.
Hello to all the rest of "patients" hope its a good one for ya...
Bear, the jokes are hilarious! A laugh first thing in the morning is great.
Hello to all the rest of "patients" hope its a good one for ya...
biggbear8
heart and soul
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2002
- Posts
- 14,049
Slick said:Man goes to his doctor and says:
"Doctor.. You've got to help me, everytime I look in the mirror, I get an erection."
"That's because you look like a c**t", replies the doctor.
*pulling Slick in my office*
http://www.smiliegenerator.de/s18/smilies-13906.png
~Elizabeth~
His horny lil devil
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2002
- Posts
- 44,369
cookiejar said:Good evening Bear and Elizabeth...I hope both of you had a great day!!
BTW ty bear for the Thomas Kinkade...my favorite
Thanks Cookie it was a very nice day and I hope your's was as well.
omahaman2
Here's your sign
- Joined
- Nov 16, 2001
- Posts
- 18,171
dr. COOKIE decided to take hER patients to a
baseball game. For weeks in advance, She coached hER patients to
respond to his commands.
When the day of the game arrived, everything went quite well. As
the National Anthem started, the doctor yelled, "Up Nuts," and the
patients complied by standing up.
After the anthem,S he yelled, "Down Nuts," and they all sat back
down in their seats. After a home run was hit, the doctor
yelled, "Cheer Nuts". They all broke out into applause and cheered.
When the umpire made a particularly bad call against the star of
the home team, the Doctor yelled, "Booooo Nuts," and they all
started booing and cat calling.
Comfortable with their response, the doctor decided to go get a
beer and hot dog, leaving hER assistant in charge.When he
returned, there was a riot in progress. Finding her tizzied
assistant, the doctor asked, "What in the world happened?"
The assistant replied, "Well everything was going just fine until
this guy walked by and yelled, "PEANUTS!"
baseball game. For weeks in advance, She coached hER patients to
respond to his commands.
When the day of the game arrived, everything went quite well. As
the National Anthem started, the doctor yelled, "Up Nuts," and the
patients complied by standing up.
After the anthem,S he yelled, "Down Nuts," and they all sat back
down in their seats. After a home run was hit, the doctor
yelled, "Cheer Nuts". They all broke out into applause and cheered.
When the umpire made a particularly bad call against the star of
the home team, the Doctor yelled, "Booooo Nuts," and they all
started booing and cat calling.
Comfortable with their response, the doctor decided to go get a
beer and hot dog, leaving hER assistant in charge.When he
returned, there was a riot in progress. Finding her tizzied
assistant, the doctor asked, "What in the world happened?"
The assistant replied, "Well everything was going just fine until
this guy walked by and yelled, "PEANUTS!"
biggbear8
heart and soul
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2002
- Posts
- 14,049
bump for Dr Cookie
and a beautiful picture of her garden
http://www.wtv-zone.com/ladysya/images/cabin-bridge.jpg
and a beautiful picture of her garden
http://www.wtv-zone.com/ladysya/images/cabin-bridge.jpg
Morning Dr. Cookie. I'm wondering if I could get a day pass out of here I'd like to go to the beach and get a tan..http://www.wtv-zone.com/KeLisa/gifs/beach/b29.gif
Last edited:
Similar threads
