Consummation of a D/s Relationship

[tropix]

I'm just interested in hearing others' opinions and experiences here...... if I'm re-hashing an old discussion, forgive me- I'm new!

It would seem in a male dom / female sub pairing, that this would happen quite early because the Master will be 'using' his sub for gratification and orgasmic release.

In a female domme / male sub situation, the Mistress may well go many months or more before allowing her sub the priviledge of intercourse.... if ever.

Would you say this is the common way of things?
Might this be a 'Rule' or an 'Exception'?
What are your thoughts and experiences as such?

 

[Kajira Callista]

I'm just interested in hearing others' opinions and experiences here...... if I'm re-hashing an old discussion, forgive me- I'm new!

It would seem in a male dom / female sub pairing, that this would happen quite early because the Master will be 'using' his sub for gratification and orgasmic release.

In a female domme / male sub situation, the Mistress may well go many months or more before allowing her sub the priviledge of intercourse.... if ever.

Would you say this is the common way of things?
Might this be a 'Rule' or an 'Exception'?
What are your thoughts and experiences as such?

It is all up to each Master or Mistress as to how they proceed with their sub/slave...i dont think there is any figuring it out...its just the way it is.

 

[TigerClaw]

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[Rantalith]

Re: Ouch.....

No, I am not using the sub for release. That would run against my grain. If I am sexual with a sub it is because she has become important to me. It is because we are starting a committed monogomous relationship.

I will not be in a D/s or any other relationship if she was not important to me. We'd only be friends then.

The D/s experience is one that is very important to me. Having a woman submit is a very special gift being given to me.

I would have to agree with this statement. I am not in a D/s relationship just for the sex. The sex will come, but there are other things that are more important in my opinion.

The gift that a sub gives her master is to be treasured. It should not be used or abused. That is one reason I will never share my sub.

 

[WriterDom]

A man who has the power is more likely to want release. I think that is a powerful natural universal urge. Throw a naked willing pussy in front of a man, and he'll probably fuck it at some point. Whether nilla or bdsm. And often times if the man is married and feels like he can get away with it.

The male submissive/ female Domme is an entirely different dynamic.

 

[TigerClaw]

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[Netzach]

I can dominate a guy I don't want to fuck.

However, when I dominate a guy I want to fuck, you'd best believe his performance will entail "living dildo, saddle me up" as part of the repetoire.

Don't have to be frigid to be powerful, and I like to get laid where I get loved sometimes.

For M and I it was a matter of about...a week. No, maybe less.

I see something I want, I take it. No dilly dallying, no playing hard to get. I wanted to fuck, it was part of the attraction.

 

[A Desert Rose]

... "living dildo, saddle me up" ...

This made me laugh.

 

[hurtme]

sex usually comes pretty quickly in my relationships, beucase sex is important to me. I was with a guy for over five years, and I had sex with him within HOURS of meeting him, beucase it just "felt right". I have also had relationships with guys who I waited for weeks to sleep with, for one reason or another (like he was a virgin and I wanted his first time to be special). The dom CAN speed things up, but I don't have much experience with that, since i am normally already pressing on the gas as far down as it will go...when I am the dominant one in the relationship, I like to toy with him before i sleep with him, and that toying lasts aobut as long as my self control...which isn't very much (at least the first time or two)

 

[NCShin]

I might be different than many here. Maybe because i don't consider myself to be a "full time" dom. But generally speaking I've brought D/s up after we've already had sex.

Now, if and when I decide to seek a submissive whom I am not in a relationship with (play party kind of thing) I don't think I'd want or expect to have sex with that person.

I think it also depends on what type of sub she was.

 

[ghosst_K&H]

from a male submissive's point of view,

if my Dommes tried to loan me out like a lawnmower, or power tool, they would find themselves looking for another submissive, i can't think of a faster way for them to break the bond W/we share.

i may be a submissive, but i'm still a person, with feelings, and not someone who is willing to submit to just anyone, and though my Domme's may find another Domme worthy of topping me, i in the end plan on keeping this choice to myself and not yielding it to them.

 

[SweetDommes]

from a male submissive's point of view,

if my Dommes tried to loan me out like a lawnmower, or power tool, they would find themselves looking for another submissive, i can't think of a faster way for them to break the bond W/we share.

i may be a submissive, but i'm still a person, with feelings, and not someone who is willing to submit to just anyone, and though my Domme's may find another Domme worthy of topping me, i in the end plan on keeping this choice to myself and not yielding it to them.

Would never happen boy - we don't share well except with each other ... if anyone tried to 'borrow' you, we'd have to claw their eyes out & rip their arms off ... (Miss Karen is a very jealous bitch.)

As for consumating the relationship - we kinda have & kinda haven't ... 1 of the 3 of us has been penitrated (and no, I won't reveal which one ), the other 2 are waiting - the anticipation is 1/2 the fun. Sex is very important to me, so some version of consumation occurs very quickly in any relationship with me, not necesarily p/v penitration, but something. I think the longest I have ever waited for sex in any kind of relationship was with Holly - she wasn't ready yet, and I waited 3 whole, torturous months.

-Miss Karen

 

[ghosst_K&H]

from a male submissive's point of view,

if my Dommes tried to loan me out like a lawnmower, or power tool, they would find themselves looking for another submissive, i can't think of a faster way for them to break the bond W/we share.

i may be a submissive, but i'm still a person, with feelings, and not someone who is willing to submit to just anyone, and though my Domme's may find another Domme worthy of topping me, i in the end plan on keeping this choice to myself and not yielding it to them.

egads! i posted this in the wrong thread. my apologies this was supposed to be in scooters sharing thread.