Constructive Feedback on Naive Teacher in Winston Ch. 15b

[54Bizcuit]

Hello everyone! I’m new here, and this is my first post on the Literotica forum—excited to join the community!

I’ve submitted two stories (Chapter 1 of my own series) and while waiting for them to be approved, I wanted to share some thoughts on Naive Teacher in Winston, specifically Chapter 15b.

I’ve been loving this series for its slow-burn corruption and Lana’s internal struggle, but I felt Ch. 15b lost some of its magic.
The guilt Lana used to feel about betraying Dennis was what made her character so compelling and the story emotionally gripping.
In this chapter, her guilt feels sidelined. That moral conflict is what sets this series apart, and without it, the charm fades a bit.
I think adding a few moments of Lana reflecting on Dennis or showing more inner turmoil (like in earlier chapters) could’ve kept the emotional depth.
The smut was great, and Dick’s manipulation was spot-on, but I’d love to see Lana’s guilt return in 15c to restore that unique tension. Thanks for reading my thoughts! I’d love to hear what others think about this chapter or the series’ direction.
Looking forward to engaging more here!
Cheers

 

[CalBishForNow]

Best of luck to your work.

A link to the story you're offering feedback on would have been a good idea. This is it, right? Honestly, judging by the first two installments in the series it's not for me, but judging by the ratings and comments it clearly does have an audience.

 

[galison]

I like the story but I haven't read the most recent chapter. I know the guy maintains a subreddit, if you're on Reddit you might check it out, the writer's probably more likely to respond there.
https://www.reddit.com/r/naiveteacherinwinston/

 

[StillStunned]

If you want to discuss another writer's work in public, it might be polite to tag them into the conversation.

 

[54Bizcuit]

If you want to discuss another writer's work in public, it might be polite to tag them into the conversation.

i didn't know i could tag the author. I'm new in the forum. How do i tag?

 

[StillStunned]

i didn't know i could tag the author. I'm new in the forum. How do i tag?

You write @ and then the author's name. You should see a list of names to choose from (although I tried it with @potatoHead42 and their name doesn't show up).

 

[54Bizcuit]

You write @ and then the author's name. You should see a list of names to choose from (although I tried it with @potatoHead42 and their name doesn't show up).

Thank you very much, i will do this next time.