Confronting my mum

[Guest]

Just today, I went into my mum and dad's room to check my hair before I went out. I saw her top drawer open, and went to close it. I saw in it something luminous yellow that caught my attention
upon closer inspection I realised it was a packet of condoms. Yet my dad has had a vasectomy.

What should I say to my mum? If anything?

 

[Guest]

well i would if i was you. if i had suspicions my mom was cheatin on my dad i would find out most defintely. an everyone better pray for the sorry bastard that is doin my dads wife. i would kill tha mutha'fucka wit ease.

 

[Guest]

Yeah, I suppose. If she is, I am seriously going to mess him up. But how do I approach her?

"Oi, you sleepin' bout, bitach?"

 

[Guest]

 

[Ms_Lilith]

Y'know.. when I first read your post, I was going to say that you should talk to your mom.
HOwever.
And there is a BIG however. Emerald makes a lot of sense. And I think you should heed her advice. She's right on every count, as far as condom use goes.

 

[wetnhorny_slave]

i also agree, by not jumping to conclusions, not only do you not entangle yourself in things which may be a complete figment of your paranoia, but you also dont have to confront your mother!

 

[dreamer]

I'm going to throw in my vote with leave well enough alone. Unless there are other reasons you would suspect your mom is sleeping with other men I wouldn't even think twice about it.

MANY people use condoms for other reasons than just contraception.

In the future, check your hair in your own mirror...and leave other peoples drawers alone. Then you won't even have to ask yourself questions like this.

 

[Ram Unreal]

My gods... what a worry over nothing! If indeed you have other reasons to suspect then sure confront. But please get facts straight before you say something you're going to regret.

There's nothing to worry about, forget...forget...

 

[Wizard]

lemme make something clear here. Lots of people use condoms for quick clean up. My ex had a vas and we used them for quickies and stuff to avoid any leakage while im working and stuff.
Lots of people use condoms for anal sex. It is actually advised that you do so. Fecal matter can travel up the penis and cause a raging bladder infectionfor the man. Some people like to switch from anal back to vaginal without showering, they use the condom for anal, remove it, and then go vaginal again.
I would think your mother wouls close her drawers, or hide them better if she was sleeping around!

If I were you. Id just stay out of your mothers stuff and quit jumping to conclusions.

Couldn't have said it better myself.............................Right on.......!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[ub6ibfine]

yes yes yes all these is true. but i wouldnt let my guard down because i care that much for my dad i would flip. that
would be some ill shit. i know someone who had condoms in the drawer an it wasnt for her man. she couldnt get pregnant. and she didnt mind gettin filled up. i can only base my feelings on my experince or knowledge on the situatuion. feel me? if not its cool too. not tryin to disrespect jus speaking how i feel.

 

[Random Variable]

Right on Target

lemme make something clear here. Lots of people use condoms for quick clean up. My ex had a vas and we used them for quickies and stuff to avoid any leakage while im working and stuff.
Lots of people use condoms for anal sex. It is actually advised that you do so. Fecal matter can travel up the penis and cause a raging bladder infectionfor the man. Some people like to switch from anal back to vaginal without showering, they use the condom for anal, remove it, and then go vaginal again.
I would think your mother wouls close her drawers, or hide them better if she was sleeping around!

If I were you. Id just stay out of your mothers stuff and quit jumping to conclusions.

As usual, Em is right on target.
To this I would add the following:
If you confront her, or tell your Dad, what possible positive consequences are there?--
1. Suppose she's cheating. Maybe there are good reasons, maybe it's just a phase. Your interference may make something bad, worse. How could your interference possibly improve the situation? Maybe your dad isn't pleasing your mom right now, but she still wants to be in the marriage and be your mom. May be your mom has terrible reasons for cheating--in that case is your confronting her or telling your dad really going to help matters?--Maybe you're just jealous of your dad's relationship.

2. Suppose she's not cheating. Then you've just embarassed yourself, your mother and your dad. At a minimum, you've shown that you can't be trusted to keep yourself out of other people's drawers.

3. Consider the possibility that you are just curious about something that's none of your business--but that the very act of finding out will change things.

4. Consider how you might help making the relationship better, not how you can interfere, right?
R.V.

 

[Young Knave]

Don't confront her. If she were having an affair, she wouldn't be so careless about the condoms. Women are smarter than that. I think even most men are smarter than that. If I were you I would try to forget that you ever saw them.

 

[schatz]

Emerald Eyed hit it on the money. Unless you have other specific facts, I would not mention anything to her or your father. My wife is on the pill but we still use condoms on ocassion. On a second reading of your post, it seems to me like you were looking for a chance to snoop around...in the future I would advise having more respect for your parents' privacy.

 

[Tallfella]

I've read your post and the answers and I have to agree with most of them. don't confront for several reasons. If nothing is going on then you are gonna get into trouble for snooping, if there is something then you gotta look at all the possibilties and I mean all sit down and think why . Dont go threatening to beat up some guy cos women aint stupid they can make their own decisions and how would you feel if your Dad was cheating on your Mum?
Lastly is the other problem that you feel uncomfortable with your parents having sex?

 

[ifitsfundoit]

Just today, I went into my mum and dad's room to check my hair before I went out. I saw her top drawer open, and went to close it. I saw in it something luminous yellow that caught my attention
upon closer inspection I realised it was a packet of condoms. Yet my dad has had a vasectomy.

What should I say to my mum? If anything?

NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING. Leave well alone.

Your mum is an adult and well capable of making her own decisions.

If she isn't having an affair, you have a serious amount of explaining to do and a major dent in your relationship with her.

If she is having an affair, it's for her reasons, and while you are her child, she has a right to lead her own life.

Is it worth the risk of confronting her...probably not.

 

[MR.GGG]

My vote's with Em

a & #1 ) None of your damn business

b) For all the stated reasons you jumped to conclusions that could and are probably completely off base. ie: lots of women who can't stand the tatse/texture of a man's orgasm use a rubber so he can cum in her mouth and she doesn't throw up.

c) how the hell would YOU feel if your mother confronted you with something she found in one of your drawers that was none of her damn business. Assuming you're older than 16 or 17 it wouldn't be any of her business unless you were doing something unLAWful and it was happening in HER house. Otherwise nothing you do in your bedroom is any of her business.

Show a little maturity and respect and pretend you never snooped or instantly assumed the worst about your mother.

 

[ronde]

I think you need to be a bit more experienced before you make judgements about things you find in places you think they should not be.

My wife and I continued to use condoms for a while just to be sure she was truly post-menopause. If you do a little research, you will learn that nature sometimes plays tricks on a woman, and it is a roll of loaded dice for a woman to bear children much after 40. I know some women do it successfully, but some downs babies are born each year because the woman thought she was infertile. The popular term used to be "change of life babies". Is your mother at this stage of her life?

Another thing that you might take time to consider is that either your mother or your father might enjoy the feeling of a condom. Popular male myth says that's not supposed to be the case, but sometimes the extra friction can be nice, and if you lubricate the inside, not the outside, the reduction in the man's sensation is minimal.

 

[Guest]

 

[exvitermini]

I'm going to disagree with the consensus. People bottle things up inside far too much. Better to casually ask outright than to suspect and decimate the trust that has taken years to build up. The paranoia isn't something that will just simply go away.

Here's my suggested script:
You: "Hey mom, I know this is kinda embarassing, but I wanted to just ask rather than worry about it, ok?"
Mom: "Sure honey, ask away!"
You: "Well, I know dad has had a vasectomy and I happened to stumble across some condoms in your room the other day while I was checking my hair. Are they just for convenience or are you unhappy with dad?"

It's not easy to say it, but it's a lot harder to live with it. She could lie to you, but then she's got more issues than just infidelity. (if that is the case at all. You're not making an unfair judgement and assuming she is cheating - you're just wanting to clarify something you've been concerned with.)

 

[Tallfella]

I'm going to disagree with the consensus. People bottle things up inside far too much. Better to casually ask outright than to suspect and decimate the trust that has taken years to build up. The paranoia isn't something that will just simply go away.

Here's my suggested script:
You: "Hey mom, I know this is kinda embarassing, but I wanted to just ask rather than worry about it, ok?"
Mom: "Sure honey, ask away!"
You: "Well, I know dad has had a vasectomy and I happened to stumble across some condoms in your room the other day while I was checking my hair. Are they just for convenience or are you unhappy with dad?"

It's not easy to say it, but it's a lot harder to live with it. She could lie to you, but then she's got more issues than just infidelity. (if that is the case at all. You're not making an unfair judgement and assuming she is cheating - you're just wanting to clarify something you've been concerned with.)

I have to disagree with that scenario entirely, if you ask your mother however nicely you put it you are heading for trouble it simply isn't any of your business if she wants to commit adultrey with the entire US marine corps and the officers it's her business not your's. Why were you in your parents bedroom anyway.

 

[Guest]

 

[exvitermini]

I'm not at all debating as to whether or not the condoms might potentially mean something other than her mother is screwing someone else. I agree that this is even a very distinct possibility. But it is also possible that her fears will be realized and it is better to discuss things than to sweep them under the carpet.

 

[Guest]

 

[Sweet Randy]

Forget it. It is really none of your damned business if your mom has condoms or not. You should not jump to conclusions about things like this. It could cause severe trouble if you happen to be wrong.

 

[bhambabygirl]

Would you want your mom to ask you about the condoms she found stuffed in y our sock drawer when she was putting away your laundry?? I think not. My mother and I have a very open relationship, and I can talk to her about sex just like I can some of my best female friends. If I found condoms in her drawer, I wouldnt think anything about it. Heaven only knows I've had my days of being unfaithful with previous significant others. If she is, the Im sure she has a logical reason. Either way, what happens behind that door is none of your business....

Besides, you never know, if you ask, you might get some response about them doing group stuff and thats so her other partner whom your father shares her with can do stuff....or some people I know used condoms on their fingers to provide anal stimulation to their men...do you really want to think about your parents doing that, or even worse, them knowing that you know that they do it....

Walk away and leave it alone...