Condoms & barriers in erotic stories

Do you prefer condoms/barriers in stories?

  • Maximum protection. This is the age of AIDS, after all.

    Votes: 1 3.2%
  • Condoms for vaginal & anal penetration. The nod to safe sex.

    Votes: 5 16.1%
  • Bareback it! There are no STDs in fantasies.

    Votes: 7 22.6%
  • Bareback it, but acknowledge the risk. Danger=Excitement.

    Votes: 2 6.5%
  • Whatever. Just write the story well.

    Votes: 16 51.6%
  • I'm only into tentacle bukkake yaoi. Gay squids don't wear rubbers.

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    31

SixtyMinuteMan

Really Experienced
Joined
Mar 2, 2005
Posts
260
Seems like this question has to have come up, but I don't see it on a search. I'm curious about whether the hivemind feels condoms belong in erotic stories or not. A couple of friends recently told me that the mention of latex decreases the eroticism for them, and now it turns out my SO agrees with them. Which is a surprise, since in real life she's a staunch advocate of safer sex. She frequently jokes that her vagina thinks all men but me are made of rubber.

As anyone who's read my stuff knows, I can't write a sex scene outside a monogamous relationship without at least a condom. It actually breaks my immersion to try, I'll completely lose the flow of the scene. I used to write group stuff the way the sex-positive community mostly practices it, which for those of you who don't know involves a lot of barriers. These days I've toned that down, but I hadn't realized that condoms were an active turn-off and I'd like to get an idea how widespread that is.

The last thing I'd want is for my "hang ups" to detract from my stories. So what say you, hivemind? Condoms? More than condoms? Barebacking? What do you prefer in your erotic fiction?
 
I don't think I've ever included a condom in one of my stories. Then again, I don't write about sex very often any more either.
 
It's kinda funny. I never used condoms in my stories before and when I wrote One that did, it got slammed because I did. I read comments in feedback about readers feeling so strong about using them and when I did, I guess the other side read my story and hated them. Because it's fantasy and readers are more concerned about the sex, I leave it out, because it's hard to make putting a condom on sound sexy. It can be done, but that's more writing than I care to do for something insignificant as that.
 
Depends on the story. There's virtually no such thing in my fantasy world ( Not that it's necessary with clerics running around to heal anything you catch and magic to detect/prevent/deal with fertility )

I'll occasionally toss a condom in a story, when the whim strikes me. On occasion, I'll have the characters bring it up, and then get too into the action to worry about it. I bring up the pill quite a bit, to eliminate the unwanted pregnancy problem, but most often ignore the STD elements unless I think it adds something to the story. I've even utilized condoms for imagery a couple of times. There's a whole set of new things you can write with them that you can't write without them.

It's all a matter of whim, or what the characters are telling me. I have no problem with stories that ignore the complications completely, those that explore the dangers fully, or anything between.
 
IMO a sex story is a flight of fancy not a PSA. I did write one story where a condom was used to move the plot along, but otherwise, bareback, baby!

Wearing a condom during sex is like taking a shower wearing a raincoat. :D
 
IMO a sex story is a flight of fancy not a PSA. I did write one story where a condom was used to move the plot along, but otherwise, bareback, baby!

Wearing a condom during sex is like taking a shower wearing a raincoat. :D

My babydoll used to say it looked like a little robber *laugh*
 
It depends on the story for me. If it's set in this day and age, my characters do safe sex. Earlier periods, not so much.

In fact, I was writing an m/m story, and one of the characters suddenly told his boyfriend that he wanted to bareback-- and I was all "Holy shit, that's heavy!" and I've kinda put the file away for a while. :eek:

In The Ballad Of Mad Moll" in which Molly is cutting a swath through the Renaissance Faire, she says; "My knees were feeling fine. The harness wasn't chafing me yet and I still had a handful of rubbers in my pocket. Life was good."
 
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It depends on the story. A condom fumble scene, for example, could be meaningful. But putting a condom on for each deed is distracting. In most of my stories I don't even mention it and assume the reader is smart enough to get it. Though because of stuff in my latest submission, I mention in an author's note that the setting is one in which unprotected sex is safe. And still I get comments about HIV. Oy.
 
It depends on the story for me. If it's set in this day and age, my characters do safe sex. Earlier periods, not so much.

In fact, I was writing an m/m story, and one of the characters suddenly told his boyfriend that he wanted to bareback-- and I was all "Holy shit, that's heavy!" and I've kinda put the file away for a while. :eek:

In The Ballad Of Mad Moll" in which Molly is cutting a swath through the Renaissance Faire, she says; "My knees were feeling fine. The harness wasn't chafing me yet and I still had a handful of rubbers in my pocket. Life was good."
Yeah, I've always felt that "I want to go bareback" is the grown-up equivalent of "let's go steady". There's a scene in one of my yet-to-be-posted m/m stories in which that's explicit, the talk about becoming that intimate is also the talk about love.

And your scene there is about the level of acknowledgment I give condoms most of the time. Even in the group scene in "Wedding Party" I think they get mentioned twice, once when they come out and once when the last one gets claimed. I don't think I come off as writing PSAs, but that's part of what I'm curious about.
 
yeah, as long as my little brain can be assured that no one is going to die ten years down the road for this night's pleasure. They don't have to be a big deal.

And that's what happened in my story. They were in the middle of a nasty little role-play about whores and johns, and then-- Billy wants to make with forever.
All I wanted to do was give Jack a chance to feel the whole thing! :rolleyes:

And I used the lack of them in another story, when the top tells her bottom that since she hadn't wrapped her strapon before she fucked him, it's reserved for him from now on.

Yeahhhh, riiiight. ;)
 
My stories seem to have a lot of communal sex in them so condoms are required. However, when committed couples get together, bareback it is . . . and babies.
 
I think a good judge of reference (and it isn't always so) is to watch porn where the men use condoms. For many, it ruins it. And I think that's the point. In writing, you are trying to please your reader, who is the unknown. Therefore, it would behoove you to not add something that no one really finds appealing, yet a few people hate. Just MHO.
 
I think a good judge of reference (and it isn't always so) is to watch porn where the men use condoms. For many, it ruins it. And I think that's the point. In writing, you are trying to please your reader, who is the unknown. Therefore, it would behoove you to not add something that no one really finds appealing, yet a few people hate. Just MHO.
Yeah, that's roughly the point my SO made. She suggested that the readers are probably bright enough to realize that in real life, nobody with a brain is having sex with strangers without protection. And that therefore the increase in eroticism of the direct contact is worth it.

I definitely need to think about this. I may work over "Wedding Party" and/or part of the "Educating Ken" series without the latex, see if I can read them without getting the creeps.
 
Double standard though it is, I tend to make sure I do have condoms when posting Gay Male stories, but rarely in the romances. I've had no objections from readers to the mention of condoms in the Gay Male stories. I think I've only written one where the guys went bareback.

Edited to add: one of the best gay male stories I ever read--in a book of erotic tales--was about a guy who had a latex fetish and was delighted to have a one-night stand with a young man who was militant about playing it safe with condoms. It was both funny and sexy.
 
Double standard though it is, I tend to make sure I do have condoms when posting Gay Male stories, but rarely in the romances. I've had no objections from readers to the mention of condoms in the Gay Male stories. I think I've only written one where the guys went bareback.

Edited to add: one of the best gay male stories I ever read--in a book of erotic tales--was about a guy who had a latex fetish and was delighted to have a one-night stand with a young man who was militant about playing it safe with condoms. It was both funny and sexy.
I'd love to read that! Remember which book?

And I suppose it makes sense about readers of gay stories and condoms. We've had a couple guys who were basically sexual pariahs in our otherwise fairly promiscuous social group because it was known that they despised condoms and would bareback with questionable hookups. Never known that to happen in a hetero crowd. Makes sense that both views would find their way into how one views erotica.

Incidentally, I'm glad you posted here. Led me to your writing. You've got talent, I'm going to enjoy reading all your stuff!
 
I've only used condoms in my erotica when it is necessary for the plot. I have a six-part series on Lit about a young woman who becomes a professional call girl. I could not have made the story in any way realistic without emphasizing how important it is that she insist of condoms with her "dates."

Otherwise, I agree with TE. Unless using a condom in some way adds to the story, my characters ride the wind without sails. ;)
 
Going back and forth between vaginal and anal penetration bothers me more than condoms or not. I served in a health field.
 
I've only used condoms in my erotica when it is necessary for the plot. I have a six-part series on Lit about a young woman who becomes a professional call girl. I could not have made the story in any way realistic without emphasizing how important it is that she insist of condoms with her "dates."

Otherwise, I agree with TE. Unless using a condom in some way adds to the story, my characters ride the wind without sails. ;)

Elliot Spitzer didn't use condoms with his prosty. He paid extra to ejaculate in her. And that was news worth reporting.
 
RULE 1: All guys in Lit stories a incredibly handsome, tall and have 12 inch cocks.

RULE 2: All guys in Lit stories can cum 15 or 20 times every 4000 words three times every day.

RULE 3: There are no STDs in Lit (except in my stories) so condoms are unnecessary.
 
If the story is meant to be realistic, the mention of condoms can actually enhance that. I've read a lot of erotic stories where rubbers were mentioned, and the only time it bothered me was in this one story that took place on a fishing boat. I had a very hard time believing that a woman on a fishing boat would just happen to be carrying a condom around.

If the story is clearly a fantasy, or if it's supposed to have an element of danger, then it's better to leave them out.
 
I had a very hard time believing that a woman on a fishing boat would just happen to be carrying a condom around.
Don't you know? They're wonderful lures for a certain type of bass. :D
 
I'd love to read that! Remember which book?
It was a "Year's Best Gay Erotica" book I believe. I'll search around and see if I can find it.

Incidentally, I'm glad you posted here. Led me to your writing. You've got talent, I'm going to enjoy reading all your stuff!
:eek: Thank you!
 
Don't you know? They're wonderful lures for a certain type of bass. :D

Tee Hee!

The replies here all seem to be skirting round things.

You should only put in stories what advances the plot.

Do your characters need to take a pee or a dump or scratch an itch? You can even do the undressing with a "clothes went everywhere until they face each other naked". Try that in RL:rolleyes:

In gay writing safe sex is often more pertinent to the development of the characters and perhaps needs addressing. In lesbian encounters, is it relevant ever?

In all fiction, TV, Film and Writing, all superflous 'noise' is left on the cutting room floor. The characters you play with are not human - they only get AIDS, STDs, have heart attacks if you will them to.

There is a trap that some newbie writers fall into of giving too much detail and spoiling the tension. "After a night of extreme passion, I slid out of bed and went into the bathroom to do my business". Shriek! All passion killed. A fictional character hasn't got bodily functions unless the plot demands it.
 
Going back and forth between vaginal and anal penetration bothers me more than condoms or not. I served in a health field.
I'm not in the health field, but I have a vagina-- it's personal, for me!
16 years ago, Valerie Kelly produced a book called "Writing erotica" which is still the most down-and-dirty-- could have been called "writing porn"

In it she gives an example of a mistake she'd made like 16 years before that, of going from ass to pussy. And people still write it...

elfin_odalisque said:
In lesbian encounters, is it relevant ever?
It's pretty relevant in most of my lesbian encounters, yeah ;)
 
If it is done well, I have no problem with condoms or what have you being used in a story. Especially if it is not a "long term relationship" that is being described.
 
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