Coitus Interruptus

[NoJo]

My wife and I were getting down to it this morning, when I got a call at 9:30 from my kid's school saying BOTH of them were ill and needed collecting.

When I got back with them, my wife was nothing more than a smell of perfume and an unmade bed.

Presumably she had a wank and stormed out of the house.

So I'm stuck here with my sick kids and a sac full of spunk. Don't feel in the mood now.

 

[impressive]

That's 'cause you're a loser smut writer with a shit sex life. Remember?

 

[NoJo]

That's 'cause you're a loser smut writer with a shit sex life. Remember?

Yes, yes, I remember. Thanks for making me feel so much better.

 

[Guest]

ok
im doing something i rarely do


Joe...you have my total sympathies.
i would empathize but i dont know what its like to have a sac full of spunk.


i would say i hate it when the phone rings during sex but thats how i make my living...

 

[NoJo]

i would say i hate it when the phone rings during sex but thats how i make my living...

If it's an 800 number, PM me.

 

[Guest]

Forget about you for a minute, how are the kids? What's the perfume? Did you make the bed (not a pun)?

Perdita

 

[cantdog]

i would say i hate it when the phone rings during sex but thats how i make my living...

With your agenda, how is it possible to call at a time when you're not having sex?

Hmmm?

 

[Pure]

speaking of which, Joe, has anyone (including you) around here ever practiced coitus interruptus --for example as an attempt at birth control?

 

[Guest]

With your agenda, how is it possible to call at a time when you're not having sex?

Hmmm?

good question.

all agendas should have addendums
its in the italisized fine print.

 

[NoJo]

speaking of which, Joe, has anyone (including you) around here ever practiced coitus interruptus --for example as an attempt at birth control?

Nope. It's against my religion.

I use condoms. I prefer the dutch cap, but it keeps slipping off my head. Most embarrassing in synagogue.

 

[Guest]

I prefer the dutch cap, but it keeps slipping off my head. Most embarrassing in synagogue.

I love blasphemy. Good laugh. P.

 

[LadyJeanne]

speaking of which, Joe, has anyone (including you) around here ever practiced coitus interruptus --for example as an attempt at birth control?

You mean withdrawal at the last moment? Sure. It can work, at least half the month. Guy's gotta have a lot of control, though.