Claiming ownership

[MissTaken]

WriterDom's thread has been niggling at my psyche. His thoughts are incredible, his words enticing if offered by one's own Dom/Master.

I have been thinking about those times when a lover has made subtle claims to "owning" me or part of me without discussion or a serious offer being made.

That really bothers me. Saying something like "That's my pussy, " or "That's my ass" can be quite erotic with someone with whom you have entered into a D/s relationship. However, when it is said randomly, I find it takes on a vulgar, cheap tone.

Am I alone in this?

Are you "owned?"
Do you "own" someone"
How does being "owned" or "owning" change your relationship or interaction?

So many questions. Discuss

 

[Ebonyfire]

Do you "own" someone"

I partially own a few dicks, and that really works fine right now cuz this Domme is busy!

Eb

 

[P. B. Walker]

Re: Re: Claiming ownership

I partially own a few dicks, and that really works fine right now cuz this Domme is busy!

Eb

Plus, most men don't mind having their cocks owned as long as they are being used. LOL.


I totally know what you mean though, MissT. If I were just with someone and it wasn't all that serious and someone said they owned me or owned part of me and meant it in a serious way and not just a "spur of the moment, hot sex type way", I'd be really put off.

I think making assumptions like that will get the person in trouble. But what is the proper response to this? I don't think you can stop assumptions like this from occuring... I mean... yanno how us guys are... lol... but how should one respond to this in a way that will raise their awareness?

PBW

 

[MissTaken]

I usually will joke about it.

I might say, "Oh yeah! You go the deed for that, Mister?"

 

[P. B. Walker]

I usually will joke about it.

I might say, "Oh yeah! You go the deed for that, Mister?"

LOL.
Not to mention they probably say it right in the middle of sex... like when they are doing it from behind and pounding your head into the headboard. lol.

I guess, it's best to just let it go and then bring it up later... when you are both dressed and out of hte bedroom... never know.. maybe they want to take the relationship further. At the very least, you let them know that it's not a cool comment to make. People aren't mind readers... as much as we all try to be (winks)


PBW "Gawd I wonder what naughty kinky stuff she thinks about"

 

[cellis]

I because of where I am in my relationship with Himself, I love it when he grabs my hair, pulling my head back so that I can look up at his face and he asks "Who do you belong to?" It is more than exciting when he claims that he owns my entire self...

but this is just me...

I love it...

what can I say?

 

[NemoAlia]

I spend a lot of time with a two-year-old daughter of some friends of mine. She is currently in the stage in which she owns everything. To her, I am "my __(insert my name here)__." Well, when my boyfriend heard it, he appropriated this nickname for his own use. Now, although usually not during sex, he'll be holding me, stroking my hair or something, and he'll say, "My ____" in a way that just gives me goosebumps.

Okay, so it's not quite the same thing as Eb's time-share cocks, but it's nice for me.

 

[A Desert Rose]

I will come back to this thread MissyT, in a day or two. This is a topic I find very interesting and one I do have opinions about. I need time to think them into a coherent process, though.

 

[Grvdigger]

I think it depends on timing and the way it is said. Like many things, timing has to be right. A bite on the neck in the throws of passion can send you soaring higher, but someone to just do it at work during the middle of the day, most likely the person would be slapped. Same with this. gem knows she is Mine, heart mind and soul. But there are times I will speak of My claim, but again she hears in My voice the pride I take in it.

Thanks for the time.

 

[lovetoread]

I have no problems with the claim of ownership if it is being used by him at that moment. It is his for as long as he wants it.

I think that is a turn on.

However, I also dont need to be told its his all the time. To be in the grocery store and have to hear that my pussy happens to be owned does nothing to me.

 

[lark sparrow]

Possession gives me tingles

I love hearing it from Mistress - it makes me tingle - whether it is simply calling me "Her own" or something overtly sexual.

Even in the unconscious D/s relationships I had in the past there was "this is my pussy", or encouraging me to say certain things during sex that had a D/s bent to them. I suppose I never stayed with someone longer-term where this wasn't present somewhat, even though it was unconscious and un-named.

Even if Mistress and I have a disagreement, and I am reminded that I am owned, I think it still gives me a tingle lol.

If someone says they own me or something of mine and it's false, I am not bothered - I just think, "yeah, yeah - we'll see".

 

[WriterDom]

I think it's one of those many things that crosses over into activities of nilla couples also. Perhaps not "owned" in the sense of ownership, but telling a woman in the heat of a passionate fuck to say "It's your pussy," can send chills down her spine. Most women are submissive when they are getting fucked in a male superior position. Outside of Dommes, but while men are from Mars and women are from Venus, Dommes are from somewhere else. Saturn perhaps.

 

[lark sparrow]

I think it's one of those many things that crosses over into activities of nilla couples also. Perhaps not "owned" in the sense of ownership, but telling a woman in the heat of a passionate fuck to say "It's your pussy," can send chills down her spine. Most women are submissive when they are getting fucked in a male superior position. Outside of Dommes, but while men are from Mars and women are from Venus, Dommes are from somewhere else. Saturn perhaps.

LOL that sounds like it comes from planet Gor. I can't speak for nilla heterosexual couples, but I've never experienced chills down my spine or ownership in sexual male superior positions. Lesbians must be from Neptune.

 

[WriterDom]

LOL that sounds like it comes from planet Gor. I can't speak for nilla heterosexual couples, but I've never experienced chills down my spine or ownership in sexual male superior positions. Lesbians must be from Neptune.

They must be. Sexy-girl turned down a million dollars to be my sex slave for a weekend. Maybe if I showed her the money, it would have been different. But I don't think so.

 

[lark sparrow]

They must be. Sexy-girl turned down a million dollars to be my sex slave for a weekend. Maybe if I showed her the money, it would have been different. But I don't think so.

You could try some of your poetry... great stuff. If that doesn't do it, nothing will.

 

[Ezarc]

I have only claimed ownership to one person. It was a special moment the first time I did. The way her body moved and shifted her posture as she accepted it was thrilling to me.
Ezarc


*edited to add details to clairify*

 

[Goddess Helena]

When I was young, I dated a man (nilla) who called me 'his girl'. In the right tone of voice, it was very nice.

I make sure that My boy is reminded that he is My boy. He blushes happily and gives Me a shy smile. He tells me that he likes being reminded that he is Mine.


Helena

 

[MissTaken]

I have only claimed ownership to one person. It was a special moment the first time I did. The way her body moved and shifted her posture as she accepted it was thrilling to me.
Ezarc


*edited to add details to clairify*

Hello Ezarc.

Welcome to the forum.

 

[MissTaken]

When I was young, I dated a man (nilla) who called me 'his girl'. In the right tone of voice, it was very nice.

I make sure that My boy is reminded that he is My boy. He blushes happily and gives Me a shy smile. He tells me that he likes being reminded that he is Mine.


Helena

I think there is a special feeling when you feel that you belong with or even to someone.

There is a comfort and peace that is not replicated in any other relationship.

I, admittedly, have used terrible judgement in knowing when to hand over the reigns, in a manner of speaking, but am learning.

 

[Ezarc]

Hello Ezarc.

Welcome to the forum.

Thank you. I see that this board has a lot to offer a new Dom. I just am growing in that direction.

*edited for spelling error*

 

[Goddess Helena]

MissTaken, I think it takes time to figure out what works for you. Then you have to apply it to a relationship, not always easy. It took me a long time to understand what I want and need. With My boy, it has not been easy. W/we are finally in a happy, trusting, loving place, but we did have to fight to get there. I love it when he calls Me his Mistress and is looking at Me with those huge green eyes and I know exactly what he means.

It's worth fighting for. You will get there.


Helena

 

[A Desert Rose]

WriterDom's thread has been niggling at my psyche. His thoughts are incredible, his words enticing if offered by one's own Dom/Master.

I have been thinking about those times when a lover has made subtle claims to "owning" me or part of me without discussion or a serious offer being made.

That really bothers me. Saying something like "That's my pussy, " or "That's my ass" can be quite erotic with someone with whom you have entered into a D/s relationship. However, when it is said randomly, I find it takes on a vulgar, cheap tone.

Am I alone in this?

Are you "owned?"
Do you "own" someone"
How does being "owned" or "owning" change your relationship or interaction?

So many questions. Discuss

So I am back to this finally. I agree with you regarding the vulgar tone when said by someone who has made no committment to the relationship.

I like belonging to someone. I like the words said to me by someone special. I know that there is only a special part of me that can be owned by another.

 

[AnelizeDarkEyes]

I because of where I am in my relationship with Himself, I love it when he grabs my hair, pulling my head back so that I can look up at his face and he asks "Who do you belong to?" It is more than exciting when he claims that he owns my entire self...

but this is just me...

I love it...

what can I say?

i am in total agreement with cellis. having had that....and now....NOT having it....sucks <wry grin> but i am willing to wait patiently for another. the thrill is matched by the comfort and security that it gives me, it makes the circle full, i suppose.

~a~

 

[Freya]

I was just reading something along these lines - an article written by a Dom I just started speaking with. It describes what he is looking for in life. He wants a slave, someone to own. My first reaction was that my back went up totally at the thought of being "owned" by someone, but then I put my instant reactions aside and read more closely what he had written. The way he described it was, in some ways, what I'd like to feel one day myself. Although it's an ownership, it's also being cherished and protected and strengthened by that. It's the giving over of total trust, having a person find what's inside of you, and bringing that out in you, having them help you to overcome your faults, yet not throw them into your face at every given opportunity.

So, in that scenario, the concepts of ownership appeal to me. Having someone consider me property like they do their TV or car, wouldn't.

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: Re: Re: Claiming ownership

Plus, most men don't mind having their cocks owned as long as they are being used. LOL.

That is not what I was saying, PBW. I do not expect you to understand, you are not a male submissive. Only a Domme who has the same philosophy of dominance that I have or sub male submissive in tune with a service orientation understands the type of relationship I describe.

Eb