Chocoholics Unite!!

[catalina_francisco]

Found this gem which can not only bring a smile, but provide us with 20 excuses for worshipping chocolate. http://www.submission.org.uk/humour2.html

Catalina

 

[catalina_francisco]

Oh and this one too...http://www.funone.com/2001/05/chocolate2/index.html

Catalina

 

[dragonlace]

thanks Catalina, those were great

 

[InnerDarkness]

Yes, Yes, and YESSSSS for chocolate!

 

[Angel_Diva]

CHOCOLATE

mmm.... chocolate.... yummy.....

 

[yaspis]

I wouldn't get by without chocolate. I mean, I could ditch almost any other vice I have, tobacco (and have because of financial situations), nutmeg, cola-drinks, even the divine Margherita pizzas from my local diner, heck, I could stop drinking rhum, even. But not chocolate or salmiakki. I'd be considered an envinronmental hazard to other people if I gave them up.

 

[shy slave]

Easter Thoughts


Don't forget the following...

1. If you break chocolate in half before biting it; the calories fall out and are rendered harmless.

2. Calories don't count on a Sunday...no God is THAT cruel.

3. If a friend gives you chocolate the calories stay with that person.

4. Chocolate IS a vegatable with added energy boost.

5. There are chocolate eaters and liars.

6. Additional message for Dom/Mmes
If you here a voice calling you but do not see anyone, follow the sound of the voice to the shops and there on the shelf will you find the begging bar of chocolate....

and finally

7. Additional message for Subs
if you have to choose between Him and chocolate....He can wait...can't He

shy slave

 

[catalina_francisco]

Reasons Why Sex is Better than Chocolate

1) Sex is good exercise.
2) Sex doesn't (need to) cost anything.
3) Sex doesn't make you fat. (for more than nine months!)
4) You don't need to have sex in the fridge in hot weather.
5) No one wants to watch videos of people eating chocolate.
6) You can't bump up your housekeeping money by eating chocolate with strangers.
7) Sex doesn't rot your teeth.
8) Sex doesn't clog up your arteries.
9) No one asks questions about chocolate in a game of spin the bottle.
10) You can't get a Tory MP to resign by eating chocolate with him when his wife's not around.
11) Sex doesn't get scarce in a cocoa famine.
12) Sex gets better the more people you share it with.
13) Chocolate doesn't upset Mary Whitehouse.
14) Your mates aren't impressed if you boast about eating chocolate four times the night before.
15) Women don't have an evenings bawdy amusement passing around chocolate at an Anne Summers' Party.
16) There's more mileage out of four fingers in sex than four fingers of Kit-Kat.
17) You don't need to throw up or take laxatives after gorging yourself on sex.
18) You can still eat chocolate if you have sex half a dozen times a day, but whose going to shag you if you spend every day eating chocolate.
19) People don't think you're sad if you're sex mad and still drink Diet Pepsi.
20) A chocolate bar doesn't get bigger when you rub it.
21) You're not promised new kitchen units by having chocolate with your husband.
22) Its not easy to get chocolate at 2 in the morning in Birmingham.
23) You can have sex all weekend without getting spots on your face.
24) There's no 0891 number for chocolate.
25) Sex would be more entertaining at the beginning of Coronation Street.
26) You can have sex between meals without ruining your appetite.
27) A day trip up north for a tour of Willy Wankers sex factory would be worth £l0.00
28) Death by chocolate doesn't make headline news.
29) You'd be disappointed if you went on an 18-30 holiday and only got chocolate.
30) When you go down on a flake you get bits in your bed.
31) No one will take you to the pictures and buy you an expensive meal just because they want to get their hands on your chocolate.
32) Your kids don't pester you for sex when you're out.
33) Chocolate doesn't get more exciting if you're tied to the bed.
34) You Can have Sex if you're Diabetic.
35) Sex Lasts Longer..Most of the Time
36) You Don't Always have to Pay for Sex
37) Chocolate Can't Lick/rub/scratch your back!
38) When Things Get Hot, Chocolate Gets Soft.
39) With Chocolate you Have to Swallow!
40) You Can't Cuddle Chocolate Afterwards.
41) Chocolate is Cheap and Meaningless...
(Do You Remember Your 1st Chocolate Experience?)
42) Chocolate makes You do all the Work...
(un-Wrap it,nibble on it,Go down on it,Swallow it)
43) Guys never call.the next day because the chocolate was so good
44) If you get some that's really terrific, nobody expects you to pass it around
45) You don't have to import it from Belgium to get the very best
46) Sharing great chocolate with a guy won't inspire him to paint your apartment or kiss you in the middle of the dance floor so passionatley it makes that guy who
dumped you really jealous
47) No matter how much you think about it, read about it and do it, it's still just as
interesting
48) Can keep you warm on a cold night
49) Doing it in the dark under the covers in secret doesn't make you feel like you need to see a therapist
50) Makes you forget about your weight instead of reminding you of it
51) May lead to love and marriage
52) May lead to the creation of actual human beings!

Francisco.

 

[shy slave]

Francisco

As usual you have all the answers (well almost!) but number 6....

I think it depends what your eating or licking the chocolate off...

or am I just trying to top from the bottom...surely not

shy slave

 

[kitty4ever]

Chocolate

 

[bunny bondage]

chocolate? WHERE?!?!


thanks, i needed that! very funny! ^_^

 

[TigerClaw]

......

......

 

[Vixandra]

Chocolate- so much can be done with it.
Thanks Catalina & Francisco.

 

[catalina_francisco]

2 days without chocolate and I am climbing the walls!! Could I be developing a serious addiction in this cheap chocolate fantasy land? Perhaps if I am exceptionally good I might be treated tomorrow when we go shopping.

Catalina

 

[Vixandra]

Hmm... chocolate good.
Especially fresh from the oven chocolate chip cookies or brownies made from scratch.

 

[TigerClaw]

......

 

[Phoenix Stone]

2 days without chocolate and I am climbing the walls!!
Catalina

AHA!!!

NOW I Understand!!!!

In case you haven't gotten your choc fix yet, just to show you how truly Mean Heartless and Unkind I am -- What I'm Eating:

Ocumare -- Criollo Cocoa Varietal Chocolate from Venezuela (unblended with any other variety of cocoa bean.)

71% cocoa mass! (yes, you can get it by proof here.)

Even has Tasting Notes: "smooth, perfumed aroma with tones of exotic wood... as well as spicy nuances...."



Ps. Actually I kinda prefer a 3 Musketeers bar.

 

[yaspis]

I just performed a vanishing trick on 200 grams of quality milk chocolate, and boy do I feel satisfied...

I do, however, have the feeling thet the choc will reappear somewhere near my waistline.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Well he certainly made sure I have enough to satisfy my chocolate craving, too much. LOL, this is one time I would be happy for him not to indulge me and spoil me!! Think I need to start a campaign to raise the price of chocolates here because it is sinful and far too tempting when you can buy 1 kg for $2.00, and for a little bit more the most exquisite Belgian chocolate, and of course Ritters which is probably the best I have tasted anywhere in the world. Oh well, he does remind me of the medicinal value.

Catalina

Edited to add I have remembered where the craving became unbearable......another certain Dominant telling me about the chocolate sauce he was eating while we chatted!! LOL, so if he reads this he knows it is all his fault, but as has always been, he is forgiven anything.

 

[Cleopatra]

I'm trying to hold back on my chocolate, but it's making me grumpy.

Could be trouble.

 

[Vixandra]

I wish I could get the Ghirradelli (sp) chocolate from San Francisco here. One of the few things I miss about living in CA.
Closest I can get here is Godiva- too prissy for me, I'm afraid.

 

[Etoile]

Oh boy, I knew I shouldn't have read this thread!

 

[Phoenix Stone]

I wish I could get the Ghirradelli (sp) chocolate from San Francisco here. One of the few things I miss about living in CA.
Closest I can get here is Godiva- too prissy for me, I'm afraid.

Ahhh. I live nearby and have no appreciation. Always seemed overrated to me. Bet they'd ship you some, though. Have you googled their website?

The place that spoils me is Trader Joes. Chocs from all over. And their own brand is good, too. You can buy it by the percentage of cocoa mass, get organic, Free Trade, etc. They have killer chocolate covered cherries with cognac inside, too -- high octane.

 

[AngelicAssassin]

Oh boy, I knew I shouldn't have read this thread!

Step away from my http://www.hersheynewsroom.com/press/kkbk.jpg.

 

[Etoile]

Step away from my http://www.hersheynewsroom.com/press/kkbk.jpg.

Have you seen they have those in "triple chocolate" now? The wafers are chocolate, too!

I tried the York Chocolate Truffle Mint Patty yesterday. Oh my god that was good.