Child's Haircut

[Zamdrist]

I pay $700+ per month in child support. Have since the court ruled it. Comes out of my check automatically, never an issue.

I pick up my son on Christmas Eve day and his hair is unkempt and overly long. Certainly long overdue for a haircut.

Is it too much of me to expect my ex-wife to get his hair cut?

I took him of course and got his hair cut, $20 with tip.

It just really rankles me, that's all.

 

[Purrde Flower]

I pay $700+ per month in child support. Have since the court ruled it. Comes out of my check automatically, never an issue.

I pick up my son on Christmas Eve day and his hair is unkempt and overly long. Certainly long overdue for a haircut.

Is it too much of me to expect my ex-wife to get his hair cut?

I took him of course and got his hair cut, $20 with tip.

It just really rankles me, that's all.

Did you ask your ex why it hasn't recently been cut? There might have been a reason for it.

 

[Zamdrist]

Re: Re: Child's Haircut

What possible good reason could there have been? And if it was important enough he not have his hair cut, would that be important enough to tell his father?

Did you ask your ex why it hasn't recently been cut? There might have been a reason for it.

 

[peachykeen]

Well how old is he, for one? Maybe he didn't want one. I can see how it could slip down the priority list. I mean is he otherwise clean and healthy?

 

[Gil_Favor]

I pay $700+ per month in child support. Have since the court ruled it. Comes out of my check automatically, never an issue.

I pick up my son on Christmas Eve day and his hair is unkempt and overly long. Certainly long overdue for a haircut.

Is it too much of me to expect my ex-wife to get his hair cut?

I took him of course and got his hair cut, $20 with tip.

It just really rankles me, that's all.

well Zamdrist,it only gets worse. i too pay 700 a month in child support, i also pay for haircuts,clothes , braces etc. at first my Exs irresponsibility used to make me angry, i tried "discussing" the issues with her, now i just count the days until my youngest turns 18. i have 4 more years.

 

[Zamdrist]

Well how old is he, for one? Maybe he didn't want one. I can see how it could slip down the priority list. I mean is he otherwise clean and healthy?

Eight years old, going on nine in Feb.

His hair was reaching down his neck and over his ears. I'd say he was at least 2 weeks over due.

It's pure laziness is what it is.

 

[Purrde Flower]

Re: Re: Re: Child's Haircut

What possible good reason could there have been? And if it was important enough he not have his hair cut, would that be important enough to tell his father?

Aparently the mother thinks that his hair was a nunju thing if you don't ask about it. I don't tell my ex about my childs haircuts.. If he ask then I will tell him what's up.

Was it so terrible that his hair was in his eyes and could not see? Maybe it is a style she was aiming for. Did you ask him why his hair hadn't been cut? 2 weeks overdue? That's it?

 

[k_girl23]

Hmmm well I don't know everything, ie how often you see your son but I guess since it was long overdue he is most of the time with his mother. In which case I believe that it doesn't take much to phone and make an appointment for a haircut and it should have been done. If if bothers you to pay out that 20 on top of the payment you make I say well he is your son too, so if it is important for you for him to have his haircut then it's just part of being a Dad.

 

[peachykeen]

Eight years old, going on nine in Feb.

His hair was reaching down his neck and over his ears. I'd say he was at least 2 weeks over due.

It's pure laziness is what it is.

Eh. I understand you're frustrated, but sounds a bit like you're making a mountain out of a molehill. Two weeks in mid-late December? Come on, it's a hectic time. So the kid's hair got a little long, so what? Like I said as long as he is healthy and clean (insofar as 8 year old boys get clean, anyway) and not living in unsanitary conditions, I wouldn't think it's worth making a fuss over.

 

[Zamdrist]

I'm not especially anal over appearance, however I do feel it's important to encourage a clean, neat appearance in a child, and regular haircuts, especially for young boys I believe is important.

 

[Purrde Flower]

I'm not especially anal over appearance, however I do feel it's important to encourage a clean, neat appearance in a child, and regular haircuts, especially for young boys I believe is important.

Clean apperance is more important than neat apperance imo. They are two different things. Allowing a child to find their own identify as long as they stay clean is important.

 

[peachykeen]

I'm not especially anal over appearance, however I do feel it's important to encourage a clean, neat appearance in a child, and regular haircuts, especially for young boys I believe is important.

You might have to accept that this is a value that is more important to you than to your ex, and therefore it will be up to you. As I said before, if you're ex is a single mom (or even a not-single mom), I can understand how a haircut could end up taking a back-seat to other more pressing issues. Especially during the holidays.

 

[Zamdrist]

There is a difference between a child wanting longer hair and hair that is unkempt because it's left uncared for.

I'm probably not doing a good enough job explaining myself. You don't know the history, and you don't know my son and ex-wife.

peachykeen - she and my son live with her parents and want for little.

 

[littlekateyes]

There is a difference between a child wanting longer hair and hair that is unkempt because it's left uncared for.

I'm probably not doing a good enough job explaining myself. You don't know the history, and you don't know my son and ex-wife.

peachykeen - she and my son live with her parents and want for little.

I understand kind of were you are coming from. You would die if you saw my sons hair, we are keeping with his heritage so it is all good. This is a busy month with shopping, gifts, parties, so the hair cut went a little past due. He is also your responsibility, and maybe she was waiting for you to pick him up and get it done. About living with the parents and not wanting for anything is not necessarily so. I currently live with my parents due to my son’s medical care and expensive. I wish we never wanted for anything, but the fact remains just because you live at home, dose not mean it is a cake walk, or less expensive.

 

[Zamdrist]

My bad. Why I thought for one moment women would agree with me, a non-custodial father, was beyond stupid.

 

[peachykeen]

My bad. Why I thought for one moment women would agree with me, a non-custodial father, was beyond stupid.

Now what exactly is that supposed to mean?

 

[littlekateyes]

My bad. Why I thought for one moment women would agree with me, a non-custodial father, was beyond stupid.

No I don’t think that is the issue. I just think it being Christmas and all, a two week past due hair cut is not bad. At least you see your child, and make sure about his welfare. Unless of course you are complaining about having to pay child support, which you weren’t.

 

[Purrde Flower]

My bad. Why I thought for one moment women would agree with me, a non-custodial father, was beyond stupid.

I personaly think if a child is taken care of, healthy and happy (or as happy as can be with divorced parents) then a few weeks late on a haircust durring a busy season isn't gounds for alarm and upset. My guess is that there is something more upsetting you than just a hair cut though. Or at least I hope there is.

 

[Zamdrist]

No, I was merely rankled and midly concerned. I never even mentioned to her.

Her own appearance (the ex-wfe) is questionable in itself, so it bothers me that those same lack of concern is being passed down. I mean...she lost most of her teeth due to cavaties and neglect.

 

[peachykeen]

Well see now then that is a bigger issue than simply 'he looks about 2 weeks overdue for a haircut', isn't it?

 

[Zamdrist]

Yeah...my back hurts, I'm in a rather pissy mood...my apologies.

Well see now then that is a bigger issue than simply 'he looks about 2 weeks overdue for a haircut', isn't it?

 

[peachykeen]

well I'm not surprised you are having back trouble. After all, the weight of the world is on your shoulders.

 

[Zamdrist]

Now stop that, you're making me smile

well I'm not surprised you are having back trouble. After all, the weight of the world is on your shoulders.

 

[Zamdrist]

Once again...

I picked my son up and his hair was long (past his ears) and mostly unkempt. If he doesn't have a hair cut this Wed. I'll have to take him and pay out of my own pocket for a haircut despite paying a healthy sum in support. Sad.

There isn't a whole lot I can do about it unfortuantely. Just venting.

 

[freakygirl]

Re: Once again...

I picked my son up and his hair was long (past his ears) and mostly unkempt. If he doesn't have a hair cut this Wed. I'll have to take him and pay out of my own pocket for a haircut despite paying a healthy sum in support. Sad.

There isn't a whole lot I can do about it unfortuantely. Just venting.

Have you ever figured out what it would cost if he lived with you on a full time basis?

A lot more than $700 a month... he is your son.. and there is nothing wrong with you getting his hair cut when needed.

Why not fight her for custody so you can keep his hair cut how you like it and not have to pay her that money? I mean.. she is a horrible mother for letting his hair go a couple of weeks. I'm sure the courts would give him to you.