Can men write from the woman's perspective?

[Navybloke]

In an act of monumental hubris, I've done exactly that - tried to write my first very short piece from the woman's perspective. It's 'semi-biographical' in that it's based on a real-life event, but I haven't spoken with our 'third' yet about writing it - I wanted to have a crack first. It's deliberately short, I haven't presumed to delve into the emotions and the finer aspects of our friendship...yet. The key question: is it obvious that a man wrote this?

 

[Nynah]

Assuming it's already published here on Lit, you should probably add a link to it so folks can have a look.

 

[MiaBabe23]

Honestly, yes I think it is obvious; to me, it reads as an obviously male pov or perhaps feasibly a female writing a male fantasy pov
I managed to get as far as the third paragraph; that simile isn’t one I think a woman would use, and it shouldn’t be on Lit…

 

[AlinaX]

In an act of monumental hubris, I've done exactly that - tried to write my first very short piece from the woman's perspective. It's 'semi-biographical' in that it's based on a real-life event, but I haven't spoken with our 'third' yet about writing it - I wanted to have a crack first. It's deliberately short, I haven't presumed to delve into the emotions and the finer aspects of our friendship...yet. The key question: is it obvious that a man wrote this?

So obviously by a man. Women never use the 'c' word. (The one that sounds like it should have a pearl inside.)

 

[StillStunned]

Men have been writing female POV characters for centuries. Women have been writing male POV characters too. Just write people, each with their unique concerns.

People's character is determined by so much more than their gender. You might as well ask whether a middle-aged lawyer from Norway could write a teenager from Singapore, or a care home resident in Buenos Aires. That lawyer is likely to have more in common with his female colleague who he shares an office with.

 

[draco519]

Women write men all the time. Men write women all the time. It's your writing and your artistic expression. Don't let anyone tell you different.

 

[SyleusSnow]

The key question: is it obvious that a man wrote this?

You haven't linked to the story and I don't feel like hunting it down but yes, men can write from a woman's perspective and vice-versa.

I've dared to write a few stories from the female POV and seem to have mostly gotten away with it. A reader once commented they had to double check my bio to see that I was indeed male.

As @StillStunned said, write your characters as people, though I'll add that it helps to focus more on emotion, empathy and doubts, assuming that fits your female character's personality. But don't be shy to make your characters, uh, uncharacteristic and break free of stereotypes. I've been working on a story with a female character who is gruff and assertive and still (I hope) unmistakably female.

 

[Navybloke]

You haven't linked to the story and I don't feel like hunting it down but yes, men can write from a woman's perspective and vice-versa.

I've dared to write a few stories from the female POV and seem to have mostly gotten away with it. A reader once commented they had to double check my bio to see that I was indeed male.

As @StillStunned said, write your characters as people, though I'll add that it helps to focus more on emotion, empathy and doubts, assuming that fits your female character's personality. But don't be shy to make your characters, uh, uncharacteristic and break free of stereotypes. I've been working on a story with a female character who is gruff and assertive and still (I hope) unmistakably female.

A link! Should have thought of that…

https://www.literotica.com/s/red-and-friends

 

[Navybloke]

Honestly, yes I think it is obvious; to me, it reads as an obviously male pov or perhaps feasibly a female writing a male fantasy pov
I managed to get as far as the third paragraph; that simile isn’t one I think a woman would use, and it shouldn’t be on Lit…

I presume that you mean the reference to a young child? If so, a fair point, but it’s not a direct reference to involvement in the story, is it?

 

[Navybloke]

So obviously by a man. Women never use the 'c' word. (The one that sounds like it should have a pearl inside.)

Which one -‘cock’? My wife uses it all the time!

 

[Navybloke]

Assuming it's already published here on Lit, you should probably add a link to it so folks can have a look.

Yes, I should? https://www.literotica.com/s/red-and-friends

 

[BellaBestia]

Yes some can, and some shouldn’t.

 

[MiaBabe23]

I presume that you mean the reference to ****** ? If so, a fair point, but it’s not a direct reference to involvement in the story, is it?

So did you ask for our povs to consider them, or to persuade us we’re wrong if we perceive the male voice…?
And the simile you correctly refer to is sexualized. Seems blatantly wrong even if for some reason it falls within the rules - which I’m fairly sure it does not
I’ve not seen women do that - and nor, I emphatically add, do the vast vast majority of men. But the tiny minuscule who do, appear to be men

 

[Nynah]

I presume that you mean the reference to a young child? If so, a fair point, but it’s not a direct reference to involvement in the story, is it?

Stylistically speaking, I agree with the previous poster who initially called this out. It's not a direct reference but it doesn't really fit with the rest of the vibe of the story. There are plenty of other similes you could have used but this one stands out for the wrong reasons.

The key question: is it obvious that a man wrote this?

If I may ask... why is this the key question? Does the gender of the author matter to the context of the story you're trying to tell?

As an aside, you put this in Erotic Couplings but I would argue that the subject matter is better suited for BDSM.

 

[hrdmngd2find]

I have only tried writing from a woman's perspective a couple times, once in a poem that was entirely from a woman's POV https://www.literotica.com/p/bound-88 and another poem where the POV's alternated between a man's and a woman's, https://www.literotica.com/p/the-blindfold-18. What I wrote in "Bound" was based on a lot of conversations with the person who is the protagonist. Whereas "The Blindfold" was based conversations with a several women, and what I've derived from reading female-authored writing.

My other writing, of course, includes female characters with their words and actions, and while it's not their interior perspective very much, it is how I imagine a woman would speak and behave. I won't deny that this is a little daunting to do. I'm always wondering how authentic it will be, so I seek out feedback from women when I can. The feedback varies widely.

Ever since puberty, I've been fascinated with what is different than me in women, and drawn to it. Over the years, I have sought to draw women out, and get them to talk about what's going on inside them, and how they experience things, especially related to sex. When it's more sex-related, it's a turn on and a fascination, and it's a way to get additional feedback on what's working with that person. I've also done types of role-playing with women I've dated as a way to create joint fantasies together. When I read erotica, I tend to mostly read women authors for the same reasons.

Of course, the trap is writing too much about what you wish the woman would be. It's one of the things that makes bad porn bad.

The fact that you are seeking feedback here is good. How much have you queried the woman who is your subject?

 

[AlinaX]

Which one -‘cock’? My wife uses it all the time!

Not that one, but thanks for playing.

 

[Navybloke]

Stylistically speaking, I agree with the previous poster who initially called this out. It's not a direct reference but it doesn't really fit with the rest of the vibe of the story. There are plenty of other similes you could have used but this one stands out for the wrong reasons.


If I may ask... why is this the key question? Does the gender of the author matter to the context of the story you're trying to tell?

As an aside, you put this in Erotic Couplings but I would argue that the subject matter is better suited for BDSM.

...well, it felt very erotic at the time!

 

[Navybloke]

So did you ask for our povs to consider them, or to persuade us we’re wrong if we perceive the male voice…?
And the simile you correctly refer to is sexualized. Seems blatantly wrong even if for some reason it falls within the rules - which I’m fairly sure it does not
I’ve not seen women do that - and nor, I emphatically add, do the vast vast majority of men. But the tiny minuscule who do, appear to be men

Fair enough, you're right on this one. I had a specific sound/image in my head but on reflection, it is somewhat jarring.

 

[countdowntolov3]

Well, I think it works. Mostly. Two critiques:

First paragraph did feel, a-man-wrote-this, to me. I guess I don't think many people, male or female, tell their internal natives like that. "Oh, I have daddy issues." We're much more likely to be specific about our own stories, even to attach complex and ongoing causes to a single event. "It's probably because my first boss was so mean, and hot." So even though the first paragraph is written in first person, I feel like it's being written about someone else.

The metaphor everyone is complaining about, I don't like it either. It's not that it's a man's metaphor. It's just lacking in emotional intelligence, period. The narrator should realize that the reader doesn't want to think of kids right then--and also that they don't want to. So failing to make that observation is weird It tells us the narrator lacks emotional intelligence. In general, women have high emotional intelligence -- so it feels a-man-wrote-this in that aspect. But frankly I think most men would avoid that metaphor too. Especially because, there are such easy ones you could use instead? A stone. A stone in a puddle!

 

[Navybloke]

Well, I think it works. Mostly. Two critiques:

First paragraph did feel, a-man-wrote-this, to me. I guess I don't think many people, male or female, tell their internal natives like that. "Oh, I have daddy issues." We're much more likely to be specific about our own stories, even to attach complex and ongoing causes to a single event. "It's probably because my first boss was so mean, and hot." So even though the first paragraph is written in first person, I feel like it's being written about someone else.

The metaphor everyone is complaining about, I don't like it either. It's not that it's a man's metaphor. It's just lacking in emotional intelligence, period. The narrator should realize that the reader doesn't want to think of kids right then--and also that they don't want to. So failing to make that observation is weird It tells us the narrator lacks emotional intelligence. In general, women have high emotional intelligence -- so it feels a-man-wrote-this in that aspect. But frankly I think most men would avoid that metaphor too. Especially because, there are such easy ones you could use instead? A stone. A stone in a puddle!

Yes, I’m on board with that now - you’re collectively right. I like this; the precision of the critique/comment is useful and

I have only tried writing from a woman's perspective a couple times, once in a poem that was entirely from a woman's POV https://www.literotica.com/p/bound-88 and another poem where the POV's alternated between a man's and a woman's, https://www.literotica.com/p/the-blindfold-18. What I wrote in "Bound" was based on a lot of conversations with the person who is the protagonist. Whereas "The Blindfold" was based conversations with a several women, and what I've derived from reading female-authored writing.

My other writing, of course, includes female characters with their words and actions, and while it's not their interior perspective very much, it is how I imagine a woman would speak and behave. I won't deny that this is a little daunting to do. I'm always wondering how authentic it will be, so I seek out feedback from women when I can. The feedback varies widely.

Ever since puberty, I've been fascinated with what is different than me in women, and drawn to it. Over the years, I have sought to draw women out, and get them to talk about what's going on inside them, and how they experience things, especially related to sex. When it's more sex-related, it's a turn on and a fascination, and it's a way to get additional feedback on what's working with that person. I've also done types of role-playing with women I've dated as a way to create joint fantasies together. When I read erotica, I tend to mostly read women authors for the same reasons.

Of course, the trap is writing too much about what you wish the woman would be. It's one of the things that makes bad porn bad.

The fact that you are seeking feedback here is good. How much have you queried the woman who is your subject?

I discussed it with our friend after it had been published. She liked it; ‘f***ing hot’ was her rather succinct review.

 

[Navybloke]

…apologies, tablet died during my previous response - suffice to say that I’m seeing observations rather than complaints and I really like the detail and focus of those observations. Thanks,

 

[Gamblnluck]

So obviously by a man. Women never use the 'c' word. (The one that sounds like it should have a pearl inside.)

I'm still lost on this one. Cloister is the only word that fits that bill and nuns use that word all the time.

 

[Navybloke]

I'm still lost on this one. Cloister is the only word that fits that bill and nuns use that word all the time.

 

[Nynah]

Perhaps "clamps" is the word. It's used five times in total, but always in reference to the nipple clamps. I do not see any other time the word "clam" is used in the story (which is what I think is being alluded to, if I parsed the pearl reference correctly).

 

[countdowntolov3]

Perhaps "clamps" is the word. It's used five times in total, but always in reference to the nipple clamps. I do not see any other time the word "clam" is used in the story (which is what I think is being alluded to, if I parsed the pearl reference correctly).

A misreading of "clamps" as "clam", maybe?