Calling all Co. members for off topic chatting till the break of dawn.

[Starfish]

Here. I think it is okay here.

Who knows? We may still get labled and set up for a floggin, but I have checked around and I am pretty sure no one will find us distracting if we chat here.


Oh, but I have to make a topic to get off of.
Let's see. Here's one...

The subject of Pettiness.

I think life is too fucking short to be petty about shit. Too bad so many get off on it, find it 'empowering' or otherwise satisfying. Too bad that, even though some people have perfect lives, that they assume everyone else does or should, and act by their standards.


Now..... All diversions welcome. All distractions are too.

 

[lavender]

 

[Svedish_Chef]

Sorry am I supposed to be here or am I supposed to avoid this?

 

[Starfish]

Lavy,

With ta ta's like that, you are the only one I want to have love children with anyway.

I hope that during incemination, I can at least have a squeeze or two of them.

 

[Starfish]

Attention to all who inquire in the mind to the nature of Chef's question:


You are a Co. member if you want to be. There is no iniciation ceremony, stupid rights of order or tactless humiliation to subscribe.

You may be abused here, with bad humour, but that should be under the understanding that your own words will be shrugged off like a piss in the wind, on matters of foul joking remarks.

 

[crystalhunting]

DOPEY
Six of the seven dwarfs are sitting around the house one day when Sleepy rushes in and says, "Guess what guys, I've won a trip to see the Pope!" Everyone gets all excited and chants, "We finally get to ask him, we finally get to ask him."

The next day, they are standing in front of the Pope, Dopey out in front of the other six. All the other six start pushing Dopey and saying, "Go ahead, Dopey, ask him, ask him!"

The Pope looks at Dopey and asks, "Do you have a question to ask me, young man?"

Dopey looks up shyly and says, "Well, yes."

The Pope tells him to go ahead and ask. Dopey asks, "Well, do....do they have nuns in Alaska?"

The Pope replies, "Well, yes, I'm sure we have nuns in Alaska."

The others all keep nudging Dopey and chanting, "Ask him the rest, Dopey, ask him the rest!"

The Pope asks Dopey if there's more to his question, and Dopey continues, "Well, uh, do they have, uh, black nuns in Alaska?"

To which the Pope replies, "Well, my son, I think there must be a few black nuns in Alaska, yes."

Still not satisfied, the others keep saying, "Ask him the last part, Dopey, ask him the last part!"

The Pope asks Dopey, "Is there still more to your question?"

To which Dopey replies, "Well, uh, yeah..... are there, uh, are there any midget black nuns in Alaska?"

The startled Pope replies, "Well, no, my son, I really don't think there are any midget black nuns in Alaska."

At this, Dopey turns all kinds of colors, and the others start laughing, and yelling, "Dopey screwed a penguin, Dopey screwed a penguin!"



HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHHAHAHAH


CH

 

[Starfish]

I am very distracted now.

 

[Siren]

Today I had a Tuna Sandwich and thought of Starfish or Starkist...

 

[Problem Child]

Starfishy

What do you think of these sex organs?

 

[Siren]

I know you asked Tuna...but

 

[Mischka]

To further get people off topic (and to solemnly identify myself as an esteemed "& Co."), I just got back from an evening of bar hopping. At the last place, I was part of a Rockettes-style group that high kicked while some random guy kareoked to a country song that I can't really remember. You don't have to call me Darlin'......Darlin'....

 

[lavender]

 

[Lovin'Life]

Lavy,

My thumb is like that and I never sucked my thumb!

You're trying to say I'm deformed too?

 

[Problem Child]

No, it's a hand I hacksawed off a dead guy in my deep freezer that whined too much about hijacking threads. It makes a great flower lifting device, seeing as it's all frozen and shit. Sheesh, of course it's my goddamn hand.




Why is everybody so fixated with my thumb?

I was just trying to show Starfishy the flower that I grew.

*sniff*

 

[Pyper]

As a child I used to pick apart my mother's flowers looking for the sex organs.

 

[Starfish]

PC, Wow! That is a beutiful Hibiscus. I love it!

I wish I could grow them here, but they are so expensive and they'd die in the winter.

I want to see more sex organs!

 

[Mischka]

You don't have to call me Darlin'......Darlin'....

 

[Svedish_Chef]

Jessica.... PM.....

 

[Guest]

Siren..
Do you think you could represent me?

I have a couple hundred members suing me for harassment.
Of course, I DID harass them but that's not my fault, I'm a genetic oddity. Trolls can't not harass people. I think it's discrimination if you ask me.

So, what do you say? Will lav. & co. take my case?

 

[Siren]

Dont start *sniffing* now or Lavy& Co. will charge you a retainer fee.

 

[Stonedagger]

hummm

TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT AT THE OFFICE AREN'T:
10. I need to whip it out by 5.
9. Mind if I use your laptop?
8. Just stick it in my box.
7. If I have to lick one more, I'll gag!
6. I want it on my desk, NOW!!!!!
5. HMMMMMMMMM...I think it's out of fluid!
4. My equipment is so old, it takes forever to finish.
3. It's an entry level position.
2. When do you think you'll be getting off today?
And the No. 1 thing that sounds dirty but at the office it isn't.
1. It's not fair...I do all the work while he just sits there!!!

 

[lavender]

 

[Stonedagger]

i like number 1 - who volunteers?

TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN LAW AREN'T:
10. Have you looked through her briefs?
9. He is one hard judge!
8. Counselor, let's do it in chambers.
7. Her attorney withdrew at the last minute.
6. Is it a penal offense?
5. Better leave the handcuffs on.
4. For $200 an hour, she better be good!
3. Can you get him to drop his suit?
2. The judge gave her the stiffest one he could.
And the No. 1 thing that sounds dirty but in law isn't:
1. Think you can get me off?

 

[Stonedagger]

hehehehehehe

Like'n number 9

TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN GOLF AREN'T:
10. Damn...my shaft is bent
9. After 18 holes, I can barely walk.
8. You really whacked the hell out of that sucker
7. Look at the size of his putter.
6. Keep your head down and spread your legs a bit more
5. Mind if I join your threesome?
4. Stand with your back turned and drop it.
3. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip.
2. Nice stroke, but your follow through has a lot to be desired.
And the No. 1 thing that sounds dirty but in golf isn't:
1. Hold up...I need to wash my balls first

 

[Stonedagger]

eh? we were talking about what?

I've learned that you cannot make Someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

I've learned that no matter how much I care,
some people are just assholes.

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you'd better have a big dick or huge tits.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more fucked up than you think.

I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place.

I've learned that no matter how you try to protect and teach your children the right way, they will eventually be corrupted by someone else's asshole kid.

I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away.