Bumper stickers!

[plasticman33]

1. Practice Safe Sex, Go Screw Yourself!

2. Impotence: Natures Way Of Saying "No Hard Feelings"

3. If Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, Then You're Doing It Wrong!

4. Don't Be Sexist - Bitches Hate That!

5. I Need Someone Really Bad......Are You Really Bad?

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

The only bumper sticker that will ever grace the bumper of my car from now on:

"Ban Bumperstickers!"

I will get a license plate frame that says "The closer you follow, the slower I go" - I hate tailgaters.

 

[Willing and Unsure]

I will get a license plate frame that says "The closer you follow, the slower I go" - I hate tailgaters.

i do that.. just cuz they make me so mad.. if they're in a hurry to get somewhere, then they could ahve left sooner

 

[Summery]

-Cleverly disquised as a responsible adult

-Don't adjust your mind, the fault is with reality

-He who dies with the most toys...still dies

-I do whatever my rice krispies tell me to

-He who hesitates is not only lost-But miles from the next exit

-Gone crazy-be back shortly

OK, a few more....................

-If you don't believe in oral sex, keep your mouth shut

-Porn, it's cheaper than a prostitute

-If you think you feel good, wait until you feel me

-Dial 911 and make a cop come

-Wanted: Meaniful overnight relationship

*Note none of these you would find on my car*

 

[plasticman33]

How about....

Necrophilia: The Uncontrolable Urge To Crack Open A Cold One!

If You're Not A Hemorrhoid, Get Off My Ass!

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

i do that.. just cuz they make me so mad.. if they're in a hurry to get somewhere, then they could ahve left sooner

Not to hijack the thread, but it is also the safe thing to do; by slowing down you increase the distance between you and the car in front of you, and you slow down both you and the tailgater - making it more likely that you both can stop safely. I have been hit from behind three times, and I don't like it when that happens.

But yes - it does piss them off; especially when I speed up again when they try to pass

I don't mind people who drive fast - I drive fast on long trips, but most accidents are due to "driver inattention"; in short - they were probably following too closely for the conditions.

 

[Fly_On_Wall]

REMEBER JESUS LOVES YOU...
Everyone else thinks your an asshole

that's the funnyist one i've ever seen

 

[celiaKitten]

The only bumper sticker I've ever had:

"Hatred is not a family value"

 

[Fly_On_Wall]

Ohh i actualy have a bumper sticker got it in vegas... went to the hover damn

I baught a hotdog and got a free bumper sticker.

I ATE A DAMN DOG

 

[portal65]

I've always liked:

NUKE THE UNBORN GAY WHALES

And

COMMENTS ABOUT MY DRIVING ?
call 1 800 EAT SHIT



portal65

 

[Willing and Unsure]

Not to hijack the thread, but it is also the safe thing to do; by slowing down you increase the distance between you and the car in front of you, and you slow down both you and the tailgater - making it more likely that you both can stop safely. I have been hit from behind three times, and I don't like it when that happens.

But yes - it does piss them off; especially when I speed up again when they try to pass

I don't mind people who drive fast - I drive fast on long trips, but most accidents are due to "driver inattention"; in short - they were probably following too closely for the conditions.

i got hit from behind once.. i was fully stopped in a parking lot when the idiot behind me decided to floor it into my back end. such a messed up day. i'm so glad i wasnt that close to the person in front of me. but it still hurt like hell and its something i dont want to experience while both vehicles are moving. i know the damage and the pain will be worse that way

 

[felixdakat]

. MY DRINKINIG TEAM HAS A BOWLING PROBLEM


it's so true to life!

 

[LRC]

If it's too LOUD, you're too OLD!

My kid had sex with your honor student.

Honk If You Want To See My Finger!

 

[Guest]

How about...

 

[Moridin187]

The only funny sticker currently on my car:
Driver Carries Only $20 In Ammunition

And one I've been searching for but haven't been able to find yet, but I know it exists:
Jesus loves you, Allah forgives you, Buddha guides you, Cthulhu thinks you'd go good on rye.

 

[Azwed]

One I really want to make and put on my car is this one.

I eat Honda Civics for lunch.

 

[LadyDarkFire]

Most of these are on my notebook...

On my car is an alien head, a vampire fish (it has fangs), and the Cthulhu sticker Moridin mentioned.

OK, On my notebook, I have quite a few:
1. It IS as bad as you think and they ARE out to get you.
2. You Will Bow To Me
3. I'm a Psycho, But in a good way
4. I Think, therefore I'm Dangerous
5. Stay Away. . . I Bite
6. I'm Smiling because they haven't found the bodies yet
7. The Whole World is going to Hell, and I'm driving the bus
8. I'm just one F#&%*ing Ray of sunshine, aren't I?
9. I Choose not to live in reality
10. Stupidity Should be PAINFULL
11. YOU all laugh because I'M different, I laugh because YOU'RE all the same.
12. Charmschool Reject
13. Don't interrupt me when I'm talking to myself
14. Don't Make me have to Hurt You!
15.I don't suffer from Insanity, I enjoy Every minute of it
16. Just Be Happy, I'm Not Your Kid
17. I See Dumb People
18. I'm Tired of Stupid People
19. This would be really funny if it weren't happening to Me!
20. You are SO making fun of me in your head!
21. Don't Persecute Me because of your IGNORANCE
22. Come Closer. . . So I can SLAP You
23. Doesn't Play Well With Others
24. Some things exsist in them whether you believe in them or not
25.Don't make me get my flying monkeys
26.The Sweetest Kittens have the Sharpest CLAWS!!!
27. Do I Look Like a F***'n People Person?
28. Where are we going, and why am I in this Handbasket?
29. Normal People Scare Me
30. Repeat Offender
31. The More you disapprove, the more fun it is for me!
32. You say Psycho like it's a Bad thing!
33. Misunderstood
34. Freak
35. Runs with Scissors
36. Sorry, was I screaming again?
37. I did a BAD Thing
38. LOSER
39. Looking forward to Regretting it
40. I have imaginary friends
41. I'm one of the bad things that happen to good people
42. 42 (See Douglas Adams for Explination)
43. can't sleep clowns will eat me (repeated, in progressively smaller fonts)
44. My kid sold the answers to your honour student
45. Born again Pagan
46. Bad Boy, Go to My Room
47.If I throw a stick, will you leave?
48. I'm the Sign You're not compatable With
49. I hate the Fact you People don't salute me
50. Homicidally Enraged, Thank you, And yourself
51.I'm not as Nice As I look
52. is a ace of spades

 

[scylis]

there's only one kind that i will (and have) put on my car. Fight Club ones. it's basically a "do not fuck with me or i'll beat your ass" sign.

ones i've considered (that havn't already been mentioned):

the driver of this car is really Dr. Sam Becket
remember when this (is a Jesus fish) wasn't a warning sign?
if you can read this, YOU'RE TOO FUCKING CLOSE!

 

[Mae13]

Not All Who Wander Are Lost~JRR Tolkein (This one has been on every car I've had in the last 8 years!)

Some other good ones:

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and good with ketchup

Dyslexics of the world, untie!

 

[aaron697]

B. Stickers and Life

DOG is my copilot

Whirrled Peas

 

[kiwiwolf]

"If you don't like my driving... get off the sidewalk!"

"If you get any closer I'll flick snot on your windscreen"

 

[aaron697]

Re: Most of these are on my notebook...

42. 42 (See Douglas Adams for Explination)

Was it the answer to life itself....42. Haven't read HGTTG since High School.....memories.

 

[Nogard]

Driver has concealed weapons permit

 

[Kaos_Star]

"you only get one life, live it up"

 

[ToddHwrd]

I don't think it's a bumper sticker but here is a good one........

In most species the baring of one's teeth is not a sign of friendship!! (referring to the fact that humans smile as a greeting)