keyboardguy
Virgin
- Joined
- Nov 6, 2010
- Posts
- 2
OK, so I have never been on any kind of adult forums before, although I come here from time to time to read stories or listen to audio. Why? Because I am totally blind and regular porn sites don't do it for me. I try to tell my friends that imagination is far better than any video, but I guess they don't believe me. Oh well, their loss.
I'm not even sure why I am posting here, but I guess I figure why the hell not. See, I don't get out much. Where I live, there are no easy routes for a blind person to follow, so I spend my time stuck indoors. i work a part time job, I play keyboards in a band and such, I have a girlfriend, that I rarely see these days due to lots of issues that aren't really her fault. And here I am. I guess I am posting in a way to find friends and fill a big hole for myself, like the need for attention, which we all have. The long and short of it is, the last year has been rough. I was dating my current girlfriend, and I kind of did a dumb thing and broke up with her a year ago. In the meantime, an old high school crush came back into my life through facebook. She was in a horrible marriage and let's just say, shit happened. She's a gorgeous woman but has a lot of issues. Things fell apart a few months ago and I went from being this great guy to a piece of crap pretty quickly. I didn't help matters, as I got myself stuck emotionall between the old high school crush and the girlfriend i am currently with. Queen wrote the perfect song, too much love will kill you and every line of that song is true. So, the high school crush got sick of me waiting to make up my mind, I guess, even though I went through her divorce with her every step of the way and was the best friend I could be. Despite her ultimatums, and calling up friends of mine when I pissed her off to talk trash about me and eventually dating said friend for 2 weeks to make me jealous before dumping him and coming back to me for three weeks before bailing out entirely. There was a lot of baggage that girl carried and I am pretty sure in my head that it's best this way, but I miss her physically, I miss the attention she gave me, I miss how she would always tell me I am sexy or hot or laugh at all my jokes and everything I do is awesome. I do get that from my girlfriend, but not as intensely, I suppose. I love my gf, she's a great girl and I regret breaking up with her and I am glad we're back together despite us dating other people for a while. She's been really understanding with my disability and such. But due to work and other things, I rarely get to see her at all, we don't have much of a physical life, and so I spend a lot of my time stuck in the house lonely and craving attention. I guess that's why I came here. See, it's not easy to convince other women that just because you're blind that you aren't a freak. I am told Iam very attractive and sexy. I a told I am a good lover. I am a good person, despite the fact that I was told I am self serving and have an agenda by the former high school crush, accusations that have hurt for quite some time. I am torn between wanting to rip her head off and just wishing she was still around. I am staying away from her and not breaking down and calling and that's fine, probably better that way. But at the moment, there isn't much to fill the attention whole, sadly. And the attention I am looking for is probably more in the physical vein. I have found myself really attached to phone sex. Sadly, the girlfriend doesn't do it, mainly becase she has a roommate and she doesn't want him to hear her and she's not good at talking while doing, so to speak. She's cool with me doing it with others, hell, she may even want to watch or listen in at some point.
Ah, hell, sorry, I am rambling. This is probably not the best forum to post in for this crap, but I guess I am just here to better handle my horny side and I figure, well, I read enough stories here, why not see what the people are like and see if I can make any friends here and have some fun. If you're cool with the idea of some horny blind guy being here and shit like that, then that certainly helps. If you have any advice for my current predicament, I'm all ears, because I've gotten myself so emotionally confused over the mess above that I am just kind of existing in this bubble of the internet and music with the exception of the rare times I do get out of the house to go to band practice or see the gf.
Sorry for the nonsensical posting. Just go easy on me, OK? I have tried phone chat lines when I was lonely and wanted some attention and mostly got ignored, so I figure maybe there is some secret language you speak when you want to hook up or maybe those chat lines like lavalife are full of shit. I don't know. I have started to feel like maybe I am kind of closer to freakish, but I don't know. Just tired of feeling invisible and want to find somewhere I belong, me and my horny erotic self, so here I am.
I'm not even sure why I am posting here, but I guess I figure why the hell not. See, I don't get out much. Where I live, there are no easy routes for a blind person to follow, so I spend my time stuck indoors. i work a part time job, I play keyboards in a band and such, I have a girlfriend, that I rarely see these days due to lots of issues that aren't really her fault. And here I am. I guess I am posting in a way to find friends and fill a big hole for myself, like the need for attention, which we all have. The long and short of it is, the last year has been rough. I was dating my current girlfriend, and I kind of did a dumb thing and broke up with her a year ago. In the meantime, an old high school crush came back into my life through facebook. She was in a horrible marriage and let's just say, shit happened. She's a gorgeous woman but has a lot of issues. Things fell apart a few months ago and I went from being this great guy to a piece of crap pretty quickly. I didn't help matters, as I got myself stuck emotionall between the old high school crush and the girlfriend i am currently with. Queen wrote the perfect song, too much love will kill you and every line of that song is true. So, the high school crush got sick of me waiting to make up my mind, I guess, even though I went through her divorce with her every step of the way and was the best friend I could be. Despite her ultimatums, and calling up friends of mine when I pissed her off to talk trash about me and eventually dating said friend for 2 weeks to make me jealous before dumping him and coming back to me for three weeks before bailing out entirely. There was a lot of baggage that girl carried and I am pretty sure in my head that it's best this way, but I miss her physically, I miss the attention she gave me, I miss how she would always tell me I am sexy or hot or laugh at all my jokes and everything I do is awesome. I do get that from my girlfriend, but not as intensely, I suppose. I love my gf, she's a great girl and I regret breaking up with her and I am glad we're back together despite us dating other people for a while. She's been really understanding with my disability and such. But due to work and other things, I rarely get to see her at all, we don't have much of a physical life, and so I spend a lot of my time stuck in the house lonely and craving attention. I guess that's why I came here. See, it's not easy to convince other women that just because you're blind that you aren't a freak. I am told Iam very attractive and sexy. I a told I am a good lover. I am a good person, despite the fact that I was told I am self serving and have an agenda by the former high school crush, accusations that have hurt for quite some time. I am torn between wanting to rip her head off and just wishing she was still around. I am staying away from her and not breaking down and calling and that's fine, probably better that way. But at the moment, there isn't much to fill the attention whole, sadly. And the attention I am looking for is probably more in the physical vein. I have found myself really attached to phone sex. Sadly, the girlfriend doesn't do it, mainly becase she has a roommate and she doesn't want him to hear her and she's not good at talking while doing, so to speak. She's cool with me doing it with others, hell, she may even want to watch or listen in at some point.
Ah, hell, sorry, I am rambling. This is probably not the best forum to post in for this crap, but I guess I am just here to better handle my horny side and I figure, well, I read enough stories here, why not see what the people are like and see if I can make any friends here and have some fun. If you're cool with the idea of some horny blind guy being here and shit like that, then that certainly helps. If you have any advice for my current predicament, I'm all ears, because I've gotten myself so emotionally confused over the mess above that I am just kind of existing in this bubble of the internet and music with the exception of the rare times I do get out of the house to go to band practice or see the gf.
Sorry for the nonsensical posting. Just go easy on me, OK? I have tried phone chat lines when I was lonely and wanted some attention and mostly got ignored, so I figure maybe there is some secret language you speak when you want to hook up or maybe those chat lines like lavalife are full of shit. I don't know. I have started to feel like maybe I am kind of closer to freakish, but I don't know. Just tired of feeling invisible and want to find somewhere I belong, me and my horny erotic self, so here I am.
