Bisexual or Bi-curious

[Cirrus]

I've started seeing this guy named Ben (and FYI, I'm a straight female...I think...thread for another time ), and he told me the other day that he is bisexual. Not a big deal to me, at all.

But, when we talked more about it, he said he found the male BODY arousing and alluring, but had no interest, and was repulsed by, doing anything sexual with a man or handling or having male genitals "in his face" as he put it. He said he would cuddle with another man, even naked...but no sex play. Then, in the same breathe, he told me that if he ever WERE with a man, it would be just for sex and he wants the emotional connection too, which he finds he can only get from a female.

Now, personally...I think this is more bi-curious than actually bisexual. No, semantics aren't that important, and I suppose he knows what's in his mind, but to me, he's either repressing the fact to some extent that he WANTS to be with a man in SOME way sexually, or what he's really trying to say is that he's bi but PREFERS women.

Thoughts? Opinions? Thanks!!

 

[SweetCherry]

It almost sounds to me like he's unsure about what he wants, and is maybe trying to think out loud. Hard to say. After all, who can ever really understand the male mind.

 

[TheOverlord]

see i know i Perfer women but have no preferance about men....just don't want to kiss them.....any fantasys about 2 guys or something like that?

 

[Etoile]

See also a thread from a couple of weeks ago on the same topic: Bisexual vs. bi-curious

 

[Sillyman]

He may be somewhat confused on the topic. of course, sexual feelings are not always the same as romantic ones, and it may be that while he finds the idea of a man exciting, he has no basis to know if he could fall in love with one.

 

[69forever]

I beleive it's a moral/social standard that has been impressed on
the male brain. All that macho stuff.

Talking from experience, some men go at it from the opposite
direction. Drawn to male sex, I'd get my cock sucked or go down
on another man. NO way though that I'd kiss or be "intimate",
because that would make me gay. Pretty screwed up logic.

Your bf seems to be drawn towards the whole package right off
the bat. Hmmm...

 

[bimarriedcock]

I think he's bi....

....and just hasnt put all the pieces together yet.

Old saying:
There was a man who would only let himself be blown.
He became the biggest cocksucker in town.

Sounds like your boy is opening up to his bisexual feelings - or is already there and at least bouncing them off you to gauge your reaction.

I'm not attracted to men "per se". Dont watch them watching down the street and get hot and bothered the way sweet looking women can do...but I am attracted to cock...going down on it more precisely stated. As I evolved sexually, I found that being what others consider "being intimate" (kissing, rubbing, holding...) came more easily and naturally...to where now, well its natural.

 

[dirty angel]

Yeah I was kind of like that in high school, but now I'm openly bi-sexual and I feel good about it. Of course I don't have to worry about jocks kicking my ass and stuffing me in a locker.

 

[PoliteSuccubus]

In the movie "Pecker" a set of parents find out their son works as a male dancer. As they stalk out he runs after them calling..

"Mom! Dad! I'm not gay! I'm trade! I don't blow, I get blown!"

 

[Ladybird]

Sounds to me as though he's still finding himself sexually. His inhibitions have allowed some bisexual feelings to come through. If he can relax and not fight the way that he's feeling, then I think in time he find he is bisexual.

That's how it happened for me. I wasn't attracted to women from puberty, but gradually over a few years. Probably allowing me time to come to terms with my sexuality.

Support and encourage him to be open minded about his feelings. The rest will follow.

 

[bimarriedcock]

I agree....

....with LB....nice AV Btw.....he's rumaging thru his bisexual feelings. With the right assistance, he'll clean that closet nicely.

Here's a quandary.....do you feel women are more open to their own/others bi or lesbian feelings than men are? I tend to think "yes" although I've no concrete reasoning to back that up.