Big Roid Recipe #3.

[Sparky Kronkite]

First - gather the "secret" spice required for this particular recipe -

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Then......

Harvest fresh human roids utilizing the "breats gathering" method, be very carefull with this -

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Then follow this recipe -

2 pounds of large human hemeroids
1 cup "secret spice"
1/4 cup cornmeal
1 cup red wine
salt, pepper, garlic powder to taste
Louisiana Hot Sauce
hog lard (cooking oil can be substituted)

Split the tough skin-like muscle that surrounds each "roid." (use a sharp knife)

You can also remove the skin easily if the "roids" are frozen and then peeled while thawing.

Set into a pan with enough salt water to cover them for one hour to remove some of the blood and drain.

Transfer to large pot. Add enough water to float "roids" and a generous tablespoon of vinegar.

Parboil, drain and rinse. Let cool and slice each "roid" into 1/4 inch thick ovals.

Sprinkle salt and pepper on both sides of sliced "roid" to taste.

Mix the "secret spice," cornmeal and some garlic powder to taste in a bowl.

Roll each slice into this dry mixture.

Dip into "Anusol." Dip into dry mixture. Dip into wine quickly (repeat the procedure for a thicker crust).

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Place into hot cooking oil.

Add to cooking oil (it'll sizzle some, so be careful!). It's HOT!!! So, do the hot dance -

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Cook until golden brown or tender, and remove with a strainer (the longer they cook, the tougher they get).

Garnish with orange slices -

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We would be amiss if we did not thank the creator of this recipe - "The" Chef -

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