Bible Verses That Make You Horny

[Marxist]

Deut 22:28-29 "[28] If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, [29] he shall pay the girl's father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the girl, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives. (NIV)."

Shekels are so fucking hot.

 

[Angel]

Deut 22:28-29 "[28] If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, [29] he shall pay the girl's father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the girl, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives. (NIV)."

Shekels are so fucking hot.

I like Satan.

 

[love2teaseu]

I heard there was some pretty saucy stuff on Song of Songs....

Never read it myself, let me know.

 

[Marxist]

Leviticus 18:22, “You shall not lie with a man as one lies with a woman, it is an abomination.”

Abomination is terribly randy

 

[Pookie]

This is kinda hot ...

For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompense of their error which was meet. ~ Romans 1:25-26

 

[Marxist]

Re: Re: Bible Verses That Make You Horny

I like Satan.

But your name is Angel? How can this be? How's the thatch?

 

[Angel]

Re: Re: Re: Bible Verses That Make You Horny

But your name is Angel? How can this be? How's the thatch?

The Devil has better sex than Jesus.

 

[Marxist]

I heard there was some pretty saucy stuff on Song of Songs....

Never read it myself, let me know.

"He shall lie all night betwixt my breasts." I like the word betwixt. Pretty hot.

 

[killallhippies]

Re: Re: Re: Bible Verses That Make You Horny

i like the one where the two she bears come out of the woods to tear apart forty little kids. that always makes the old sergeant salute.

 

[Marxist]

This is kinda hot ...

For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompense of their error which was meet. ~ Romans 1:25-26

"Recompense" made my balls twitch. I'm not sure if that's a horny thing or a ball temp thing.

 

[Marxist]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Bible Verses That Make You Horny

i like the one where the two she bears come out of the woods to tear apart forty little kids. that always makes the old sergeant salute.

I think that was reported by Elijah, right?

 

[Epiphany]

Solomon's Song 5:4 "My beloved put in his hand by the hole of the door, and my bowels were moved for him. I rose up to open to my beloved; and my hands dropped with myrrh, and my fingers with sweet smelling myrrh, upon the handles of the lock. I opened to my beloved; but my beloved had withdrawn himself, and was gone: my soul failed when he spake: I sought him, but I could not find him; I called him, but he gave me no answer."

 

[Marxist]

Solomon's Song 5:4 "My beloved put in his hand by the hole of the door, and my bowels were moved for him. I rose up to open to my beloved; and my hands dropped with myrrh, and my fingers with sweet smelling myrrh, upon the handles of the lock. I opened to my beloved; but my beloved had withdrawn himself, and was gone: my soul failed when he spake: I sought him, but I could not find him; I called him, but he gave me no answer."

I just shot a load on your backdoor.

 

[killallhippies]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bible Verses That Make You Horny

I think that was reported by Elijah, right?

i do believe you are right. all because they called him bald.

 

[Marxist]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bible Verses That Make You Horny

i do believe you are right. all because they called him bald.

God is one mean ass motherfucker.

At least Old Testament wise.

 

[Pookie]

"Recompense" made my balls twitch. I'm not sure if that's a horny thing or a ball temp thing.

My nipples got hard. But it's kinda cool in here right now too.

 

[CoolidgEffect]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bible Verses That Make You Horny

God is one mean ass motherfucker.

At least Old Testament wise.

God can be one righteous dude in the new testament as well.

Acts 5:1-11
1 Now a man named Ananias, together with his wife Sapphira, also sold a piece of property. 2 With his wife's full knowledge he kept back part of the money for himself, but brought the rest and put it at the apostles' feet. 3 Then Peter said, "Ananias, how is it that Satan has so filled your heart that you have lied to the Holy Spirit and have kept for yourself some of the money you received for the land? 4 Didn't it belong to you before it was sold? And after it was sold, wasn't the money at your disposal? What made you think of doing such a thing? You have not lied to men but to God." 5 When Ananias heard this, he fell down and died. And great fear seized all who heard what had happened. 6 Then the young men came forward, wrapped up his body, and carried him out and buried him.

7 About three hours later his wife came in, not knowing what had happened. 8 8Peter asked her, "Tell me, is this the price you and Ananias got for the land?" "Yes," she said, "that is the price." 9 Peter said to her, "How could you agree to test the Spirit of the Lord? Look! The feet of the men who buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out also." 10 At that moment she fell down at his feet and died. Then the young men came in and, finding her dead, carried her out and buried her beside her husband. 11 Great fear seized the whole church and all who heard about these events.

 

[killallhippies]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bible Verses That Make You Horny

God is one mean ass motherfucker.

At least Old Testament wise.

mean and vindictive, but i understand he's kinda cute.

 

[sunstruck]

Re: Re: Re: Bible Verses That Make You Horny

But your name is Angel? How can this be? How's the thatch?

Satan was an angel once ya know.

 

[Marxist]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Bible Verses That Make You Horny

Satan was an angel once ya know.

At least the Koran says so.

 

[Epiphany]

I just shot a load on your backdoor.

Oh baby

 

[Nikkitta]

Wonders if you had to post an invite over on GB just to make a go of this one ?

 

[Pookie]

This sounds like a party to me ...

4 Before they had gone to bed, all the men from every part of the city of Sodom--both young and old--surrounded the house. 5 They called to Lot, "Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us so that we can have sex with them." ~ Genesis 19:4-5

 

[killallhippies]

This sounds like a party to me ...

4 Before they had gone to bed, all the men from every part of the city of Sodom--both young and old--surrounded the house. 5 They called to Lot, "Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us so that we can have sex with them." ~ Genesis 19:4-5

they have such a friendly welcoming commitee in sodom. i think i should visit.

 

[Pookie]

Widowed sister-in-laws always get laid.

And, no pulling out either!

8 Then Judah said to Onan, "Lie with your brother's wife and fulfill your duty to her as a brother-in-law to produce offspring for your brother." 9 But Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so whenever he lay with his brother's wife, he spilled his semen on the ground to keep from producing offspring for his brother. 10 What he did was wicked in the LORD's sight; so he put him to death also. ~ Genesis 38:8-10