Being tricked?

[satindesire]

It happens to the best of us, but if you are Dom, why did you go to her? If she is sub, she should come to you. For the first meeting, you can meet her on safe-ground for her security, but the sub always comes to the Dom. Don't let a sub start out by thinking she has control.

I don't agree with this at all, for various reasons. One of them is that a Dom coming to a sub is not giving up any amount of control. Meeting a sub on her comfort zone, on grounds she's familiar with, in my opinion is a sign that the Dom wants the sub to be comfortable and feel safe.

 

[Scotsman69]

Precisely. Only on this occasion it didn't work at all. Ho hum. We all learn. Even me. Well, maybe....

 

[satindesire]

Precisely. Only on this occasion it didn't work at all. Ho hum. We all learn. Even me. Well, maybe....

That's not due to the fact that you went to see her, it was due to the fact that she is a douchebag.

 

[fuckmeat]

I don't agree with this at all, for various reasons. One of them is that a Dom coming to a sub is not giving up any amount of control. Meeting a sub on her comfort zone, on grounds she's familiar with, in my opinion is a sign that the Dom wants the sub to be comfortable and feel safe.

I completely agree. Any guy who plays the 'if you were a true submissive you'd travel to my hometown and meet me naked in a park at midnight' card is going to get told where to stick his ego. A first meet (if we're talking M/f) should always be about the sub's personal safety.

 

[Scotsman69]

Well, a deceiver anyway. I have no idea why anyone would want to spend so much time and effort to decieve someone she'd never met. But it appears that such folk exist. One lives and learns.

Now if I was anywhere near you...

 

[satindesire]

Well, a deceiver anyway. I have no idea why anyone would want to spend so much time and effort to decieve someone she'd never met. But it appears that such folk exist. One lives and learns.

Now if I was anywhere near you...

Then you'd have to be content with a platonic and friendly hug and kiss on the cheek.

My husband fulfills all my Domly wishes.

 

[Scotsman69]

Accepted.

 

[minx1]

Well, a deceiver anyway. I have no idea why anyone would want to spend so much time and effort to decieve someone she'd never met. But it appears that such folk exist. One lives and learns.

Now if I was anywhere near you...

Perhaps nerves kicked in? Hopefully she didnt set out to decieve but rather chickened out when she had to put her money where her mouth was

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

Perhaps nerves kicked in? Hopefully she didnt set out to decieve but rather chickened out when she had to put her money where her mouth was

Oh, you always see the good in people minxie!



I've had the same thing happen. People I've even spoken to on the phone, have wimped out. Give them another chance, it happens again.

It's happened several times now, and I've come to the conclusion that people are whack.

 

[Netzach]

I met her online her on lit and all that I have posted has been real and truthful on my part.

Just move along and don't get caught up in it all. Two days of online chat with someone should not be that big a deal.

 

[Netzach]

Negativity breeds negativity, Bunny. Remember the Golden Rule. *hugs*



Take them off your friend's list and put them on ignore. Then block her number off your phone, if you gave her your phone number. If she has your email, remember to block her there, too.

That isn't negativity it's a soft thwap with the common sense stick. This thread could have been six useful seconds long and anime dude on to sane people.

 

[satindesire]

That isn't negativity it's a soft thwap with the common sense stick. This thread could have been six useful seconds long and anime dude on to sane people.

I'm sorry, I guess I don't equate "What's the big fucking deal?" with a "soft thwap".

I suppose it comes from the way I was raised in that if you are trying to help someone in a nice way, you don't curse them out. *shrugs* No offense intended Bunny.

 

[minx1]

Oh, you always see the good in people minxie!



I've had the same thing happen. People I've even spoken to on the phone, have wimped out. Give them another chance, it happens again.

It's happened several times now, and I've come to the conclusion that people are whack.

*grins* I only say it because I've been there myself, I'm almost ashamed to admit
Fear and lack of confidence can be overwhelming sometimes. In my case I had every intention of going...unfortunately on the actual day I had a massive panic attack about it and wimped out. I did get in touch though.

This isnt in response to what you said Lizzie or this thread, its more of an observation over time. People tend to get really hung up on the whole internet deception thing. For me its no different than in real time. Sometimes I'm gullable/sometimes I'm not. Sometimes I read people well/sometimes not. Sometimes people are disingenuous lying bastards/and sometimes not lol.
I always come back to my ex husband...I thought I was a pretty good judge of character until I met him. But afterwards realised I hadnt known him at all. If people want to decieve they will do it whenever and wherever...sure the internet might make it easier to execute.
I reckon that whether its the internet or reality, the only person you can ever be 100% certain of is yourself. I dont mean that to sound cynical or pessimistic. I just believe it to be true. Random observation over lol

 

[Stella_Omega]

I'm sorry, I guess I don't equate "What's the big fucking deal?" with a "soft thwap".

I suppose it comes from the way I was raised in that if you are trying to help someone in a nice way, you don't curse them out. *shrugs* No offense intended Bunny.

sidetrack R me this morning! Satin, you need to learn the difference between using an expletive in a sentence to denote a strong emotion-- and "cursing someone out."

Bunny shows that she's exasperated, and would like to encourage OP to understand that his knotted up emotions are an over-reaction to the fairly obvious trolling.

"cursing him out" would be applying a lot of cusswords to him specifically-- "You stupid fucking pissant, get your head out of your ass."
That would be worth your remonstration, my love.

 

[satindesire]

sidetrack R me this morning! Satin, you need to learn the difference between using an expletive in a sentence to denote a strong emotion-- and "cursing someone out."

Bunny shows that she's exasperated, and would like to encourage OP to understand that his knotted up emotions are an over-reaction to the fairly obvious trolling.

"cursing him out" would be applying a lot of cusswords to him specifically-- "You stupid fucking pissant, get your head out of your ass."
That would be worth your remonstration, my love.

According to her Blurt, she was feeling very "aggressive and mean" and I do believe she was accidentally taking out her aggression on someone that didn't deserve it. I think that when we get an unnecessarily mean attitude, we drive new people out of the BDSM forum, and personally, I've been reprimanded several times for being overly harsh with new folks who didn't have the same ideas about x and y that I had, and later on, I was grateful for the reminder that we need to treat people welcomingly.

 

[Stella_Omega]

According to her Blurt, she was feeling very "aggressive and mean" and I do believe she was accidentally taking out her aggression on someone that didn't deserve it. I think that when we get an unnecessarily mean attitude, we drive new people out of the BDSM forum, and personally, I've been reprimanded several times for being overly harsh with new folks who didn't have the same ideas about x and y that I had, and later on, I was grateful for the reminder that we need to treat people welcomingly.

This is a very good point

 

[satindesire]

This is a very good point

Thank ya sir.

 

[BiBunny]

According to her Blurt, she was feeling very "aggressive and mean" and I do believe she was accidentally taking out her aggression on someone that didn't deserve it. I think that when we get an unnecessarily mean attitude, we drive new people out of the BDSM forum, and personally, I've been reprimanded several times for being overly harsh with new folks who didn't have the same ideas about x and y that I had, and later on, I was grateful for the reminder that we need to treat people welcomingly.

There was nothing accidental about it. And that's all I have to say about that.

 

[satindesire]

There was nothing accidental about it. And that's all I have to say about that.

Okay, bunny.

I hope you feel better soon.