Being autistic, adhd and random stuff

[stickygirl]

Spends a couple of hours chatting with old friends...
then spends a week trying to recall if I caused offence or spoke too much

 

[PMarky2]

Spends a couple of hours chatting with old friends...
then spends a week trying to recall if I caused offence or spoke too much

Yep, I can relate to that. It is less of a problem with my ND friends, but it is still there.

 

[LegendInMyOwnMind]

My second son (deceased at 9) had a congenital brain defect discovered on autopsy, which led to him being diagnosed as autistic during his life. Behaviorally, he presented as mostly non-verbal, low fuctioning autistic.

Yet he could read people to a degree that would be above average for neurotypicals. I can't count how often he knew I needed a hug before I knew it myself.
And not only me, his mom of course, but once even a drunk sitting on a bench in front of a mall. He sat down next to the man and hugged him before his mom and I could intervene. The man cried rivers. He had not received simple affection for years beyond count.

It was then I knew, as a lifelong Protestant, that I had fathered a saint.I still cry for him at night sometimes. Though he's been gone since 2010.

 

[Strixaluco]

Yet he could read people to a degree that would be above average for neurotypicals.

Some autistic people are exceptionally sensitive to other people's emotions. Which can also be very uncomfortable, as it also applies to negative emotions.

I'm sorry for your loss

 

[stickygirl]

My second son (deceased at 9) had a congenital brain defect discovered on autopsy, which led to him being diagnosed as autistic during his life. Behaviorally, he presented as mostly non-verbal, low fuctioning autistic.

Yet he could read people to a degree that would be above average for neurotypicals. I can't count how often he knew I needed a hug before I knew it myself.
And not only me, his mom of course, but once even a drunk sitting on a bench in front of a mall. He sat down next to the man and hugged him before his mom and I could intervene. The man cried rivers. He had not received simple affection for years beyond count.

It was then I knew, as a lifelong Protestant, that I had fathered a saint.I still cry for him at night sometimes. Though he's been gone since 2010.

I sometimes want to hug strangers but we're taught we shouldn't. I guess your son was beautifully unrestrained in that respect. Yes, perhaps a saint and certainly a gift. Thanks for sharing

 

[stickygirl]

Got a quick author question

I am writing a long story that includes a 23yr old, level 1 autistic woman. Early on she is 'targeted' by an older married man, who hides the fact he is married in order to take advantage of her sexually.
When she is told the truth by a trusted friend, she has shutdown for some hours ( like you would ).

The next day she decides to confront the man in a public space in front of other people.

1. I've assumed she will confront him ( would she though? )
2. Would she be icy cold or super verbal/angry
3. Could it trigger a meltdown?
4. Some other reaction I've not thought of.

What I think I ought to write is that she confronts him ( on a Sunday outside church ) and shouts at him loud enough for others to hear. A woman who overhears, admonishers her for 'leading on a married man' because wtf - other women do stuff like that!

Anyhowsie. What would you do? I'd get angry then burst into tears.

 

[Noor]

Got a quick author question

I am writing a long story that includes a 23yr old, level 1 autistic woman. Early on she is 'targeted' by an older married man, who hides the fact he is married in order to take advantage of her sexually.
When she is told the truth by a trusted friend, she has shutdown for some hours ( like you would ).

The next day she decides to confront the man in a public space in front of other people.

1. I've assumed she will confront him ( would she though? )
2. Would she be icy cold or super verbal/angry
3. Could it trigger a meltdown?
4. Some other reaction I've not thought of.

What I think I ought to write is that she confronts him ( on a Sunday outside church ) and shouts at him loud enough for others to hear. A woman who overhears, admonishers her for 'leading on a married man' because wtf - other women do stuff like that!

Anyhowsie. What would you do? I'd get angry then burst into tears.

I wouldn’t bother confronting.

 

[stickygirl]

I wouldn’t bother confronting.

Thanks, that's interesting. The problem is I suspect I can't see wood for trees atm.

 

[Strixaluco]

Got a quick author question

I am writing a long story that includes a 23yr old, level 1 autistic woman. Early on she is 'targeted' by an older married man, who hides the fact he is married in order to take advantage of her sexually.
When she is told the truth by a trusted friend, she has shutdown for some hours ( like you would ).

The next day she decides to confront the man in a public space in front of other people.

1. I've assumed she will confront him ( would she though? )
2. Would she be icy cold or super verbal/angry
3. Could it trigger a meltdown?
4. Some other reaction I've not thought of.

What I think I ought to write is that she confronts him ( on a Sunday outside church ) and shouts at him loud enough for others to hear. A woman who overhears, admonishers her for 'leading on a married man' because wtf - other women do stuff like that!

Anyhowsie. What would you do? I'd get angry then burst into tears.

I wouldn't confront anyone in a public space, I'd be absolutely too self-conscious.

And in such a case I'd probably just block them. But when I confront someone, I tend to get angry, and there's risk of a meltdown.

However, whether she'd be icy cold or angry depends on what kind of personality you make them.

 

[stickygirl]

I wouldn't confront anyone in a public space, I'd be absolutely too self-conscious.

And in such a case I'd probably just block them. But when I confront someone, I tend to get angry, and there's risk of a meltdown.

However, whether she'd be icy cold or angry depends on what kind of personality you make them.

Yups .... like when I confronted my neighbour about their noisy cockerels ( and I lost it a bit )

This scene from my story was always some way off so I didn't need to give it much thought. Now that I've caught up, I think I might let my subconscious mull it over for a couple of days.

 

[PMarky2]

I wouldn’t bother confronting

Got a quick author question

I am writing a long story that includes a 23yr old, level 1 autistic woman. Early on she is 'targeted' by an older married man, who hides the fact he is married in order to take advantage of her sexually.
When she is told the truth by a trusted friend, she has shutdown for some hours ( like you would ).

The next day she decides to confront the man in a public space in front of other people.

1. I've assumed she will confront him ( would she though? )
2. Would she be icy cold or super verbal/angry
3. Could it trigger a meltdown?
4. Some other reaction I've not thought of.

What I think I ought to write is that she confronts him ( on a Sunday outside church ) and shouts at him loud enough for others to hear. A woman who overhears, admonishers her for 'leading on a married man' because wtf - other women do stuff like that!

Anyhowsie. What would you do? I'd get angry then burst into tears.

I suspect I would be in the angry and start crying camp. After that probably rigidly avoid that person because they had really hurt me.

 

[stickygirl]

I'm thinking that her trusted female friend ( who will be a love interest ) will suggest the two of them confront him. This also helps the plot to push the two women together.
I'm not sure I would have the courage to face him so...