BDSM & the Language Barrier

[Shadowsdream]

Language barriers come in many forms but the one I have in mind at the moment is between two native tongues.
My native tongue is english...I speak a minimum of swedish and understand even less of it.
My slaves native languages are swedish and danish he speaks some german, can get by in italian if he must and speaks a very credible english.
I live in his Country at the moment so I am in effect handicapped to a certain degree.
Language when it is not a native language shared by the Dominant and the submissive as a first language can also be USED to excuse to misunderstand. An easy way out...

Anyone care to share in this conversation?

 

[catalina_francisco]

I can so identify with the living in a land where English is not the main language. I am finding I read more than speak, simply because there has been no time to learn Dutch. Master speaks Dutch, Spanish, English, and a little German. At times there have been communication problems due to a different understanding of the english word, but they are rare. I also realised it would be very easy to use at times to get out of a tight spot, but thankfully have not been tempted to go against my usual up front honesty....I am so crazy I tell him when I have disobeyed whether there is an opportunity for him to discover it himself or not. LOL. Guess that is part of why he trusts me.

I also find it impacts on my ability to serve him in the way I would normally in that I am unable to make phone calls for him, often need him to accompany me to shops etc., as we live in a part of the country where most do not speak or understand english, and just plain researching local things for him. The advantage is I can edit any english written documents he needs have checked before submitting or using. It is scary at times to realise if something happens to him, we are stranded here with no idea what to do etc. I am working on getting him to list all emergency and service numbers and such as I might need in the event of him being injured or worse. Still in all I would not change a thing as I love it here, and I love being his property.

Catalina

 

[Krinaia]

For the first time in my life, I'm living with a European. Bulgarian to be exact. And often times it will amaze me the words she doesn't know or some cultural tid bit she will miss.

Sometimes the cutlural barrier is even harder to overcome then the language barrier I think. I know you're from Canada, Shadowsdream and you from Australia, Catalina. Being American I often feel disadvantaged becuase Americans immerse themselves in an ideal "American" culture that does not exist. I think the rest of the world is much more knowledgable on their fellow countries.

One thing I'm interested in - both of you come from countries where the population is not particularly dense as in comparison with most of Europe and you to being in Stolkholm/Amsterdam - was that a shock to you when you first arrived?

 

[Shadowsdream]

I can so identify with the living in a land where English is not the main language. I am finding I read more than speak, simply because there has been no time to learn Dutch. Master speaks Dutch, Spanish, English, and a little German. At times there have been communication problems due to a different understanding of the english word, but they are rare. I also realised it would be very easy to use at times to get out of a tight spot, but thankfully have not been tempted to go against my usual up front honesty....I am so crazy I tell him when I have disobeyed whether there is an opportunity for him to discover it himself or not. LOL. Guess that is part of why he trusts me.

I also find it impacts on my ability to serve him in the way I would normally in that I am unable to make phone calls for him, often need him to accompany me to shops etc., as we live in a part of the country where most do not speak or understand english, and just plain researching local things for him. The advantage is I can edit any english written documents he needs have checked before submitting or using. It is scary at times to realise if something happens to him, we are stranded here with no idea what to do etc. I am working on getting him to list all emergency and service numbers and such as I might need in the event of him being injured or worse. Still in all I would not change a thing as I love it here, and I love being his property.

Catalina

~~grin~~ I knew you would show up!
hello and welcome to the conversation

There is a certain dependency that occurs to the ONE that is not of the native Country and tongue. It is not an ideal situation for a Dominant but may in some ways feed the feelings of being owned by a slave..in the beginning.

Will you spend much time trying to learn dutch? I spent over a year studying faithfully 8 hours a day but discovered in this Country it is difficult to get understood even if you are speaking 95% correctly...Så Jag pratar inte svenksa!

The difficulty in the M/s division is I can easily become distrusting if I have caught even one *use* of the language misunderstanding to be used against Me. My memory does not weaken and once tested I am over aware.

 

[Shadowsdream]

For the first time in my life, I'm living with a European. Bulgarian to be exact. And often times it will amaze me the words she doesn't know or some cultural tid bit she will miss.

Sometimes the cutlural barrier is even harder to overcome then the language barrier I think. I know you're from Canada, Shadowsdream and you from Australia, Catalina. Being American I often feel disadvantaged becuase Americans immerse themselves in an ideal "American" culture that does not exist. I think the rest of the world is much more knowledgable on their fellow countries.

One thing I'm interested in - both of you come from countries where the population is not particularly dense as in comparison with most of Europe and you to being in Stolkholm/Amsterdam - was that a shock to you when you first arrived?

No the dense population was not a shock. I have always travelled extensively. I have lived in logging communities that have less than a dozen inhabitants and also in the larger Canadian cities.
The shock for Me, and it was a lovely shock, was the amazing beauty and history of Stockholm. It is a city that I fell in love with immediately.
We in Canada say hello to everyone on the street and ~~smile~~ easily at the people we pass. That does not occur here. That was the biggest shock to My friendly disposition.

 

[catalina_francisco]

One thing I'm interested in - both of you come from countries where the population is not particularly dense as in comparison with most of Europe and you to being in Stolkholm/Amsterdam - was that a shock to you when you first arrived?

I was forewarned so a little forearmed, but the difference is noticeable. I have always had a car and driven for pleasure and necessity so it is strange soming to a culture where it is more a luxury than a necessity and people think driving half an hour is too far to go....LOL, I used to go driving for something to do from 4am til midnight without stopping for anything other than fuel and the odd photo shoot. Being a solitary person who is used to going and sitting alone on a cliff overlooking the ocean when I need time to ponder the uiniverse and rejuvenate the soul, I find it hard never being able to go anywhere without other people being there....even driving in Oz can have you driving for hours without passing another car or human.

I am also trying to become accustomed to personal space issues which I have never had a problem with whereas now I find it very difficult to deal with people rubbing shoulders, actually pushing at times, without any need....this is also impacted by the need to be vigilante for pickpockets. Amazes me you can be standing at a counter or looking at something and someone will step in and basically push you aside where there is plenty of empty space. I have also found the attitude different. We are used to saying hello to tourists, smiling at strangers, helping almost anyone....here that is a rarity. Actually find people here are often suspicious of outsiders as I am told I am considered. To be fair, this is mostly due to the part of the country we live in and I find Amsterdam and surrounding areas to be more relaxed toward strangers, though pickpocketing is more prevelent also. Is all a good learning curve which has the ability to widen your perspective on many things and open the mind to other perceptions of reality.

Catalina

 

[catalina_francisco]

~~grin~~ I knew you would show up!
hello and welcome to the conversation

Will you spend much time trying to learn dutch? I spent over a year studying faithfully 8 hours a day but discovered in this Country it is difficult to get understood even if you are speaking 95% correctly...Så Jag pratar inte svenksa!

Now my days are more my own than they have been to date I am hoping to attack the language.....notice the use of language, attack? LOL....and become more proficient. I have really not been game enough to try speaking it as yet but am amazed at how much I understand in listening and more so in reading. Those shopping catalogues which used to get on his nerves are priceless for learning language, as are the shopping channels I usually avoid like the plague in Australia!! Like you said, I have been told by both Dutch and other immigrants that their accent and pronounciation is always picked up on and interferes at time with understanding. Thankfully I love a challenge. I actually have a hunger to learn Spanish more as I have alsways wanted and now have the added incentive of being able to communicate with my mother-in-law, but someone has forbidden it until I learn passable Dutch.

Catalina

 

[Shadowsdream]

Now my days are more my own than they have been to date I am hoping to attack the language.....notice the use of language, attack? LOL....and become more proficient. I have really not been game enough to try speaking it as yet but am amazed at how much I understand in listening and more so in reading. Those shopping catalogues which used to get on his nerves are priceless for learning language, as are the shopping channels I usually avoid like the plague in Australia!! Like you said, I have been told by both Dutch and other immigrants that their accent and pronounciation is always picked up on and interferes at time with understanding. Thankfully I love a challenge. I actually have a hunger to learn Spanish more as I have alsways wanted and now have the added incentive of being able to communicate with my mother-in-law, but someone has forbidden it until I learn passable Dutch.

Catalina

I have many Swedish computer programs for learning the language..interactively..it might be something to consider as you can learn the pronounciation in private.
All language schooling is free in Sweden..is it the same in the Netherlands?

 

[catalina_francisco]

I have many Swedish computer programs for learning the language..interactively..it might be something to consider as you can learn the pronounciation in private.
All language schooling is free in Sweden..is it the same in the Netherlands?

I am told there is a free government provided option, but I also have been told by some they use a hopeless method. I was wanting to buy a computer program from the markets as it seemed a good way to try first given our unpredictable schedule. Good to hear from someone who has used it and found it good, think it may be my next avenue. I am actually feeling more positive about it lately since I realised how much I have picked up without realising. Think I'm on roll. LOL.

Catalina