BDSM (New to) and Slaves

[YendorD]

Well, this'll be a bit strange for me, so pardon a little rambling. Never posted to a board of this nature before, but have discovered I prefer to be in control. I have several questions, of course, and will try to make them rather coherent (chuckles)

First off, is there any way to judge if you are a 'good' Master?
How do you find a good slave?
After finding your slave, what have some of you done? I mean, things like ground rules, etc. (not really what you put them through though)

That's all I can think of for now, thanks.

 

[misshum]

From my experience...

I do not have "years" of experience like many on here, but regarding finding your slave, the BDSM personals I would think is a good place to start. That's where I found my sub.

 

[Cricket Song]

BDSM personals? I didn't know there were personals here.

 

[m wisdom]

Here you go
https://forum.literotica.com/forumdisplay.php?f=32

 

[Cricket Song]

Oh wow, thanks

 

[Evil_Geoff]

First off, is there any way to judge if you are a 'good' Master?
How do you find a good slave?
After finding your slave, what have some of you done? I mean, things like ground rules, etc. (not really what you put them through though)

Lets see.... are you a "good" Master?

Do you keep your slave well fed? Do you play with them often? Do you work them hard? Have you trained them to do the things you want them to do? Do you encourage them? Do you provide for their physical, spiritual and emotional needs? Is your slave thriving under your control or withering? Do you assist them when they need it? Do you set them up to fail?

YOU will probably not be a good judge of your own success or value as a Master. Your slaves judgement will probably be more accurate.


How do you "find a good slave?"

By keeping your eyes and ears open, by networking, by conducting yourself in such a way that the kind of slave you seek will petition you, by building a reputation in the Scene as being a Master of good character, honor, strength, compassion & skill. By getting out from behind the computer and doing the things that need doing.

After finding a slave, we spend a lot of time communicating. We learn about each other, build trust, establish my authority and her obedience. We do things together, go to movies, eat, listen to music, talk about our families, watch TV, go shopping, go bowling, share our hobbbies, go fishing, visit friends, cuddle, play, sleep, go to work, spend time on our own.... As for specific ground rules, I posted some of the day-to-day stuff in another thread and I'm not in the mood to repeat myself.


In otherwords, we do all the things any couple would do in their relationship. Some of our shared interests and needs may be a little off the beaten path for most couples, and we don't necessarily run down to the local convenience store to do those things. But what we do is build on our commitment, our shared interests (to include kinks), we work together to meet _our_ needs as individuals and as a couple.

It ain't so different from anyone else, we just happen to share some kinks! *grin*

Hope that helps!
- Geoff

 

[greenmands]

Plus we attempt to communicate with each other better than 'normal' couples. And we stress the values of honesty, respect, and trust.