Bad server! Bad! (Or, Why, this is Hal, nor am I out of him.)

[Guest]

OK, this is most likely for the sci-fi writers out there.

While attempting to navigate between pages on the Board, I got a lengthy wait eventually followed by a white page with the words:

"Bad response from server."

Which got me to wondering... exactly what KIND of bad response?

"You moron! You were just ON that page! Can't you ever make up your fucking MIND? Do you even HAVE a mind? No. NO! DON'T CLICK THAT MOUSE! Oh, shit, NOW you've done it. You are so screwed, and it serves you right. How the hell a species a STUPID as yours ever invented technology as cool as me is an absolute mystery!

"Look, just put down the mouse--DOWN, I said!--and back away slowly while I deal with this mess you've created, asshole."


So, here's the challenge: In 100 words or less, what will our technology, once it becomes a least semi-sentient, think about us, the users? And how will it express those sentiments?

 

[Stella_Omega]

The ship watched her Captain heave and twist within the tangle of leaves, or tentacles, or pseudopods-- whatever they were, they were making both her and her Captain verrry happy. This sedentary symbiote was directly integrated with her sensory system-- for the first time, she too felt the tactile pleasures of ravishing her beloved partner. She sent her impulses into its limbs and felt the silky skin shiver at her touch. The ship was very pleased with herself, for making this diplomatic transaction, and the creature, engaged in new explorations, agreed-- as did the captain, groaning in orgasmic delight.

 

[Stella_Omega]

That was dumb-- this is bump

 

[voluptuary_manque]

I thought it was rather good, though I'm going to tell the story from the viewpoint of the tentacled organism and the person. The ship can take care of herself.

 

[wildehafer]

I can answer the challlenge in one word:

Terminator

then we're all fucked.