Bad Random Life Tips.

[MrPractical]

Be flexible...You have no idea what is coming your way...don't miss it

 

[mnbreastluver]

Placing cheese on your toilet seat is a great way to melt it for nachos

 

[HotBrand]

Play strip poker while wearing your winter clothes and multiple layers.

Your friends will appreciate your ingenuity.

 

[Trixxii]

Open as many credit card accounts as possible. Free money!

... I was once mobbed by six shrieking clowns when walking in London.

Words can't express the puddle I had made by the time they left.

How awful. I'm sorry that happened to you.

Play strip poker while wearing your winter clothes and multiple layers.

Your friends will appreciate your ingenuity.

I do this. Lol!

 

[HotBrand]

I do this. Lol!

You monster! I've never ever had to strip naked in poker though. Probably because of my four nipples!

--

Gambling is fun but it can be risky.

Mitigate your risk by using your partner's credit card instead.

 

[sally_sparrow]

If your sleep schedule is messed up, stay awake for 32 hours and it will reset naturally.

 

[NoUseForAnyName]

If the ATM spurts out money, keep withdrawing. You are on a streak!

 

[sally_sparrow]

Hold your breath when you step on the scale in order to weigh less.

 

[HotBrand]

Ensure your sexual partner always wants more by never giving them an orgasm.

 

[sally_sparrow]

Fart when people hug you. It makes them feel strong.

 

[HotBrand]

Impress everyone with your knowledge by correcting them at every possible opportunity.

 

[stickygirl]

If you suspect you have coronavirus you should lick yourself to see if you taste of anything

 

[sally_sparrow]

You should not wear a seatbelt because, in the event of a crash you're better off being thrown out of the car than being trapped in it.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Want to get back on your feet just skip 3 car payments.

 

[HotBrand]

Spray people on the street with water labelled "COVID VACCINE DIRECT FROM COVID CARRIERS".

We all need a good joke after all.

 

[sally_sparrow]

Want a job installing cable TV? Prove your skills by showing up to the interview 2 hours late.

 

[HotBrand]

Remember: you're not cheating on your partner if you have sex in front of them.

If anything, they'll appreciate your honesty and join in.

 

[sally_sparrow]

Worried about covid and can't find a mask? Wrap your face in Clorox wipes instead.

 

[HotBrand]

You can only catch one virus at a time. Everyone knows this.

Catch the winter flu and you can walk maskless amongst crowds like the indomitable hero that you are.

 

[sally_sparrow]

If someone makes you mad while driving, simply close your eyes and count to ten.

 

[LizVegas79]

Hitch-hike in Idaho wearing open-toed fuck-me heels, short short jeans and a one-size too small Black Lives Matter tank top with no bra. (works great as an outfit for girls, but especially white guys trying to work on new material to break into stand-up comedy)

 

[HotBrand]

Hitch-hike in Idaho wearing open-toed fuck-me heels, short short jeans and a one-size too small Black Lives Matter tank top with no bra. (works great as an outfit for girls, but especially white guys trying to work on new material to break into stand-up comedy)

Bloody hell! That's so brutal!!

 

[NoUseForAnyName]

Go to a fine French restaurant, one winning awards, order an expensive meal and then ask for a bottle of ketchup. They will love that.

 

[sally_sparrow]

If you are tired of cold weather just light yourself on fire.

 

[MrPractical]

If you find yourself on fire..... run...really fast