Bad Random Life Tips.

[Shenanigans90]

Never hide your feelings about your in-laws from your spouse.

 

[mnbreastluver]

When you get a new car, scratch the paint and put a small dent in it right away. This will save you from worrying about it getting scratched or dinged when you leave it in parking lots.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Since home Covid tests are hard to get just use a home pregnancy test. Widely available and they work the same.

 

[stickygirl]

Give your child a dead cat. If they can show they can care for a dead one, then you can try a living one in a year or so.

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

Duct tape turns no no no's into mm mm mm's

 

[mnbreastluver]

If you have a runny nose stop drinking water. After awhile no runny nose.

 

[mnbreastluver]

If your SO is nervous about making a sex tape with you, suggest using a stand-in for her nude scenes.

 

[mnbreastluver]

If you decide to be a surrogate for someone, don't stop at that paycheck. Do pregnancy fetish porn, too, and really cash in big!

 

[mnbreastluver]

Driving in the snow and ice? Go as fast as you can, you don't want to be on the dangerous roads longer than necessary.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Make all decisions with a flip of a coin Let fate decide.

 

[Taegul]

Help keep Fire Departments well-funded by starting at least one random fire a day.

 

[Cat]

Before going on a hike in the desert: drink all your water! Then you would have less luggage to carry, and keep the water from evaporating.

 

[Justabaldguy70]

It is ok to scratch your balls with a cheese grater

 

[Jacques_Corbin]

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you cannot pick your friend's nose.

 

[theeonanist]

Save yourself for “The One” you can never get your cherry back.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Should a police officer ever pull you over asking "Sir, how high are you?" Just say "No, it's 'Hi, how are you?'" And drive away.

 

[Shenanigans90]

Rub used motor oil on your chapped lips for instant relief.

 

[stickygirl]

As a woman, if you're grossed out by a work colleague scratching their balls in the office, scratch your nipples and see how they like it

 

[Tallulah82]

As a woman, if you're grossed out by a work colleague scratching their balls in the office, scratch your nipples and see how they like it

I think there'd be a handful of men who would like it?




You know that feeling you get in your gut when something happens? Ignore it. It's just your body telling you you've not got enough excitement and drama in your life.

 

[stickygirl]

Hear a noise in the basement? Make sure you cough loudly and stamp your feet as you investigate - any intruders will be frightened away by your courage.

 

[Codeman93]

If your balls and cock hurt make sure you use icy hot to relieve the pain!

 

[mnbreastluver]

If you don't want to get pregnant and you don't have protection then just chop your boyfriend/husband's testicles off before getting intimate. BONUS - he doesn't have to pay to get a vasectomy. Win Win.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Avoid getting your car stolen by spray painting the whole car white to blend in with the snow

 

[Shenanigans90]

Be considerate of fellow passengers during your flight and crack the door open while you smoke.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Testicles are sensitive and prone to injury. To prevent damage, tuck them up inside your butthole during daily activities.