Authorial vices

[Varian P]

I write for lots of reasons, but two of the reasons I wrote porn/erotica seem diametrically opposed, as often as not.

I write scenarios and characters that turn me on, and I write characters and scenarios that allow me to explore certain ideals of sexuality and relationships that I don't see represented very often in the literature, films, and other media I consume.

Problem is, many of my turn-ons are wrapped up in dynamics that are cliche, at best, and, if I may get hyperbolic for a moment, entwined with the cruel yoke of heterosexist patriarchy, at worst.

So, while I feel good about exploring themes of polyamory and fluid sexuality, I cringe a bit that I repeatedly incorporate dynamics where the men are older, self-assured, and experienced, and the women are younger, inexperienced (often virginal), shy and self-doubting.

Does anyone else have this problem--where you find yourself repeatedly writing stuff that turns you on (sexually, psychologically, whatever), but which feels like you're selling out on the kinds of representations you'd rather be putting out there?

Or is it just me?

 

[Stella_Omega]

As a butch dyke it does seem a little strange to me that I'm writing nothing but slash at the moment.

You do have to write for yourself Varian-- unless you're making your living at it, you'd best enjoy what you do for hobby-time. And if you get off on the May/December dynamic, you know there are people out there that share your joy, and not all of them are older men, either, there are women who love the fantasy of being taught by an older more experienced companion-- over and over again.

How does your readership react?

 

[WRJames]

I had a little bondage in my first novel, a little more in the second -- you get the idea. My editor at Club Lighthouse Publishing keeps urging me to put in more, because that's what sells -- and I enjoy writing it. Truly -- a guilty pleasure. My lady has no interest in pain -- except ...

And all my characters are bisexual -- my main male character, married to the most beautiful woman in the world, has this thing for older men. Where is that coming from?

 

[CeriseNoire]

I do think about it sometimes. Like when I noticed most of my heroines were big-chested and started wondering if that wasn't buying into the 'Hollywood fantasy". Then I reminded myself that I was writing the scenarios that turned me on.
Sometimes the PC beast does creep up on me, though.

 

[Dar~]

As a butch dyke it does seem a little strange to me that I'm writing nothing but slash at the moment.

Mmmm speaking my language...I could use a butch Dyke in my life right about now...wanna tie me up or just hold me down?

 

[Stella_Omega]

Mmmm speaking my language...I could use a butch Dyke in my life right about now...wanna tie me up or just hold me down?

Seems to me holding you down would be better-- I don't think you have the patience for all those knots

 

[flavortang]

I write stuff I'd want to read, plain and simple.

 

[Dar~]

Seems to me holding you down would be better-- I don't think you have the patience for all those knots

I really don't...I am horny as hell and could use a good fight. Not butch, but seriously toppish.

 

[Nasha]

boo boo

 

[Varian P]

As a butch dyke it does seem a little strange to me that I'm writing nothing but slash at the moment.

Hmmm, yes...that brings up a whole other set of (probably much more fun) questions. I absolutely get off on writing scenes in which I don't see "myself" at all: writing m/m sex is very near the top of my hot list.

You do have to write for yourself Varian-- unless you're making your living at it, you'd best enjoy what you do for hobby-time.

Maybe my instant-gratification personality is a blessing of sorts, here, because I think I'm actually incapable of writing something that doesn't excite me on some level. I could never be one of those pens for hire, writing a story according to someone else's pre-destinted formula.

I guess I just find myself wishing my erotic hot-buttons and my socio/political views were more in line.

But then again, the excitement in human dynamics stems from tension, and one obvious source of tension is power disparity. At least I have fun watching the girls turn the tables, now and then.

And if you get off on the May/December dynamic, you know there are people out there that share your joy, and not all of them are older men, either, there are women who love the fantasy of being taught by an older more experienced companion-- over and over again.

How does your readership react?

Actually, it's not so much the May/December thing that works for me. But I do have a major virginity fixation (I know, how trite is that?), and without getting crazy with wacky plotlines, the only plausible way to have a virgin is to have a young'un. Meanwhile, I actually don't find youths all that interesting, so anyone who doesn't need to be a virgin is likely to be in their thirties, at least.

As for my readership...the dozen or so people I've managed to woo into my weird little worlds seem to like my tales, and the dynamics therein, well enough. But I suppose that's sort of a biased sample.

 

[Varian P]

And all my characters are bisexual -- my main male character, married to the most beautiful woman in the world, has this thing for older men. Where is that coming from?

Hmmm...just about all my male characters are bi. Another aspect of my stories dictated by my personal preferences: there's gotta be a boy in the mix. The women are optional. So, apart from my female MC, it's generally all guys, all the time. And the female MC is always more than happy to see the man in her life exploring those bi tendencies.

 

[CeriseNoire]

I do find myself writing a lot of dark stories, where sometimes things don't end well, and bad people go unpunished. Those don't make it here though. I had one floating in my head where one woman destroys another's entire world, pretty much out of boredom. It makes me wonder...

I've also been thinking of writing a 'tentacles' story. The thing is, it would obviously involve some extent of non-consent. Guess what turns us on doesn't have to be what we approve of.

 

[WRJames]

Hmmm...just about all my male characters are bi. Another aspect of my stories dictated by my personal preferences: there's gotta be a boy in the mix. The women are optional. So, apart from my female MC, it's generally all guys, all the time. And the female MC is always more than happy to see the man in her life exploring those bi tendencies.

Yeah -- my stories too. But -- in real life, if I'm on a nude beach, I'm not looking at the guys. I write this stuff and wonder "where the hell did that come from?"

 

[neonlyte]

Yeah -- my stories too. But -- in real life, if I'm on a nude beach, I'm not looking at the guys. I write this stuff and wonder "where the hell did that come from?"

I'm guessing most do that. Certainly applies to me though I'm less entrenched in the act of sex than I am in the circumstance that allows it to happen. For me it's the chemistry.

 

[starrkers]

I do find myself writing a lot of dark stories, where sometimes things don't end well, and bad people go unpunished. Those don't make it here though. I had one floating in my head where one woman destroys another's entire world, pretty much out of boredom. It makes me wonder...

I've also been thinking of writing a 'tentacles' story. The thing is, it would obviously involve some extent of non-consent. Guess what turns us on doesn't have to be what we approve of.

I think quite often the very fact that we don't approve is part of the turn on.

 

[Pure]

i don't think a virginal figure in a fantasy is odd, or shows non PC leanings. they are in Sade's stories.

IF you aspire to Lit-tra-choor and reality, then no 'virgin' is just that, but has a personality, etc. And might NOT be eager to lose it, at least to a yeti. Or she might want to lose it, but afterwards regret the manner it happened, etc.

probably you are somewhere in between, as some of lit's better persons (you're one) are. it's fantasy, but the tedium is broken because there's some character touches. perhaps your plotlines deviate from the usual formulas, although 'virgin despoiled' or 'virgin becomes horny nymph' are pretty standard. as i recall, you're at least in the ball park of Lit-tra-choor. IMO, hardly any lit writers are 'there', certainly not myself.

i think the problem, and i feel it too, regarding visual material. our brains are programmed; so sometimes the most cliche depiction, narrow waisted teen with big boobs, tongue touching her lips, jazzes the nervous system despite my politics.

 

[Stella_Omega]

"i don't think a virginal figure in a fantasy is odd, or shows non PC leanings. they are in Sade's stories."I understand the first part of this-- but can you expand a little on the second sentence? I can't figure out what "they are" refers to!

Varian, back to your points-- a group that I write with tends to come back to one particular scenario-- a straight man seduced by a flamboyantly gay one. It's the immovable object and the irresistible force, and this group writes it over and over-- the novelty never palls (not to mention that it gives us a virgin-- in one respect, at least-- to deflower).

... dammit, there was something else I was going to say, but I've forgotten what it was....

 

[only_more_so]

I write scenarios and characters that turn me on, and I write characters and scenarios that allow me to explore certain ideals of sexuality and relationships that I don't see represented very often in the literature, films, and other media I consume.

To my sensibilities, the first reason is a good reason to write, the second isn't. Of course, I'm a bit of a strange duck at times. In books, stories, movies, television, I can recognize when something is of high quality, but if the subject matter doesn't appeal to me, I won't like it or care about it. On the other hand if there are technical flaws, but it is about something I like, then I will like it, even as I recognize the faults and shortcomings. Most artsy movies I despise, because the director went to so much trouble to make something artistic, that he neglected to make something that someone should care about or enjoy.

I'm not a "life's too short" sort of person. I think there is plenty of time in life to explore things you enjoy, but I don't see the point in doing something, or writing about something you don't enjoy just because.

 

[Varian P]

Starting up again after falling asleep at the wheel...

I do find myself writing a lot of dark stories, where sometimes things don't end well, and bad people go unpunished. Those don't make it here though. I had one floating in my head where one woman destroys another's entire world, pretty much out of boredom. It makes me wonder...

I don't really have qualms about writing the darker stuff, generally. Bad people going unpunished is a fact of life, and going inside the mind of someone capable of going on a rampage of cruelty is just psychologically intriguing, since most of us just aren't wired that way.

I've also been thinking of writing a 'tentacles' story. The thing is, it would obviously involve some extent of non-consent. Guess what turns us on doesn't have to be what we approve of.

This is definitely one of my pet vices. For whatever reason, the non-con thing definitely turns me on (though I'm extremely fussy about how it plays out), and it features, on some level, in most everything I write. And I definitely fret at times that I'm comitting the age-old porn crime of eroticising sexual violence.

I've rambled on and on about this before, elsewhere, but...I don't believe some person out there is going to read my non-con story and run out and attack someone. But I do wonder where this little fetish of mine came from, and whether some eroticised borderline-rape scenes affected my sex synapses at an early age. I'd really much rather have a nice, wholsome fetish, like corsets or doing it under representations of a misty-eyed Jesus, or something.

 

[NoJo]

A lot of women fantasize about being taken against their will. In fact I'd say it might even be the norm. I don't think you need to look for a childhood trauma to explain it. Resistance adds a frisson of pleasure, and rape fantasies, which after all are pretty safe, taking place as they do in the privacy of one's head, are really just an exaggeration of "playing hard to get".

 

[Varian P]

I think quite often the very fact that we don't approve is part of the turn on.

I think you're on to something, there. Taboo is at the core of a lot of erotic fantasy, as rather un-subtly illustrated by a lot of the categories here at Lit, such as incest, non-consent, loving wives, etc.

There are probably a lot of people who would cringe at the thought of making out with their brother or sister, who totally get off on incest stories. And no doubt people who cherish the ideal of devoted monogamy who make little puddles reading stories from the loving wives category, because rather than in spite of the fact that they'd be horrified, or at least indignant, at such things happening to them/near them in real life.