Australia

[Radiohead]

It depends what you like doing.

Melbourne for the apex gang and carjackings.

Hey, just cause you moved into the second site.

 

[Radiohead]

I have no idea what that means.

I was going to say first, but Tarneit seems to have that title.

 

[Radiohead]

I still have no idea what second site is. But don’t people get banned around here for letting on where other people live...

I mean, Now these arseholes know I live in whatever the fuck “second site” is.

Dont mind me, I cant even untangle whatever you're putting at the end of the sentence.

 

[BobaFetaCheese]

Don't neglect to buy a kangaroo scrotum bottle opener.

https://s3.amazonaws.com/live_object_images/28010/1.jpeg

I actually have one of those. My dad got it for me when he was there years ago. He thought it was funny. I thought it was just weird but I still have it.

 

[Radiohead]

I actually have one of those. My dad got it for me when he was there years ago. He thought it was funny. I thought it was just weird but I still have it.

Theres tobacco pouches and towball covers too, if you're that way inclined.

 

[BobaFetaCheese]

Theres tobacco pouches and towball covers too, if you're that way inclined.

It's such a weird thing to me. They're balls. I mean I get it but I don't.

 

[Radiohead]

It's such a weird thing to me. They're balls. I mean I get it but I don't.

It's buffalo pouches in the states isnt it?

 

[BobaFetaCheese]

It's buffalo pouches in the states isnt it?

I've never seen them but I have no doubt they exist. Australians and Americans are similar in that respect. We got no class.

 

[PollDancer]

It's such a weird thing to me. They're balls. I mean I get it but I don't.

Americans are tit worshippers.
Other side of the globe? Balls.

 

[Radiohead]

Americans are tit worshippers.
Other side of the globe? Balls.

That sounds like a UK statement.

Balls, indeed.

 

[PollDancer]

Counter clockwise cunnilingus.

 

[Radiohead]

Counter clockwise cunnilingus.

Reverse orgasms?

 

[BobaFetaCheese]

Reverse orgasms?

That doesn't sound good at all

 

[phrodeau]

Those trailers and ads for the son of Crocodile Dundee movie? Fake news.

 

[Radiohead]

That doesn't sound good at all

You suggested it

 

[Hypoxia]

Limerick time:

There was a young lady from Adelaide...

 

[oggbashan]

Limerick time:

There was a young lady from Adelaide...

Grew bored of being an unfucked maid

She bought us Barossa wine

Removed her clothes and then mine

And now she's well fucked and often laid.

 

[Radiohead]

Grew bored of being an unfucked maid

She bought us Barossa wine

Removed her clothes and then mine

And now she's well fucked and often laid.

I'm glad someone could answer this, cause for all of my nearly 40 years here I thought how could I not know this?

 

[Hypoxia]

Northern Territories tourism advert:

http://media-assets-03.thedrum.com/cache/images/thedrum-prod/s3-news-tmp-10557-cunt_0--2x1--940.jpg

 

[Amoebah]

Arn?
Narn.

 

[BobaFetaCheese]

Northern Territories tourism advert:

http://media-assets-03.thedrum.com/cache/images/thedrum-prod/s3-news-tmp-10557-cunt_0--2x1--940.jpg

I had to look that up. Turns out it's not official and they aren't happy about it but it's kinda popular I guess. Credit to Aussies for that one.

 

[Radiohead]

I had to look that up. Turns out it's not official and they aren't happy about it but it's kinda popular I guess. Credit to Aussies for that one.

I heard it was massively released and someone pointed out the obvious rather quickly... all the local current affairs programs had something on it.

But if Australia doesnt release cringeworthy stuff as tourism, noone notices.

 

[oggbashan]

There was a young lady from Adelaide
Apprenticed to the world’s oldest trade
Told the john was a sticky wicket
Said she didn’t understand cricket.
He’s fucked, scarpered, leaving her unpaid.

There was a young lady from Woolloomooloo
If well fucked created a loud hullabaloo
Her partner said ‘Please, dear Mabel
Much quieter coition if you’re able’
The neighbours are complaining whenever I do.

There was a young lady from Botany Bay
Who said 'I’d like my first fuck, if I may'
Her boyfriend was willing
Her pussy he’s filling -
She wants fucking all night and all day.

Variation:

There was a young lady from Botany Bay
Who said 'I’d like my first fuck, if I may
I’m bored with just jilling
My cunt it wants filling.' -
Now they’re fucking all night and all day.

 

[Hypoxia]

I knew I could depend on Ogg.

Next entry:

There was an old gent from Tasmania...

 

[oggbashan]

Tasmania is awkward to rhyme.

There was an old gent from Hobart
Whose first wife had been a real tart
He searched the whole of Tasmania
To find a good wife who was brainer
She keeps him in ignorance – that’s art.


How about this:

Aussie sheilas like telling new men
Who think that the cock rides the hen
'In Oz girls do the riding
Down there you're abiding,
Don't cum till the lady says when'.