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are you rapture ready?

I've got a revolver, a flashlight, a portable radio, a roll of duct tape, my childhood copy of Yertle the Turtle, a six-pack of root beer and a tin of beans. I'm ready for anything from hurricanes and earthquakes to the zombie apocalypse, the Rapture, the wrath of God, or just a weekend without power.
 
CleverCowardice said:
I've got a revolver, a flashlight, a portable radio, a roll of duct tape, my childhood copy of Yertle the Turtle, a six-pack of root beer and a tin of beans. I'm ready for anything from hurricanes and earthquakes to the zombie apocalypse, the Rapture, the wrath of God, or just a weekend without power.
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Don't forget the fire extinguisher.
 
All I know is that if the Amex web site does not stop crashing my computer every time I try to pay my bill those bitches ain't getting paid!
 
once the world starts burning i'll start caring. trust me. it's a good plan since the tribulations come first. swear. says so in the bible. any one that says otherwise can fuck off. god is a dick. just accept it. we all get to suffer before the righteous get saved. suck it, christians.
 
"Behold, I shew you a mystery; We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed, In a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trump: for the trumpet shall sound, and the dead shall be raised incorruptible, and we shall be changed. For this corruptible must put on incorruption, and this mortal must put on immortality"
(1 Corinthians 15:51-53).
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trump, trump, trumpety trump? is this like a card game with tells? that last sentence really sucked.

Why Didn't He Take Me?
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quit whining, loser :rolleyes:

If you are reading this after the rapture, you need to realize that you have been left behind.
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aaahahhahahahahhahahahaaa
 
Zombie apocalypse, rapture, super belated Y2k meltdown are all situations in which I'd be rendered effectively useless. I have a terrible sense of direction (but getting better!) (ish), I've never handled a weapon deadlier than a steak knife, and I don't know how to fix things. I bet you need to know how to fix things. And I wear contact lenses. People with contact lenses are going to be screwed. I need to learn some survival skills - 12/21/12 is just around the corner!

On the other hand, I'm okay at Boggle! *waggles eyebrows*
 
Phelia said:
Zombie apocalypse, rapture, super belated Y2k meltdown are all situations in which I'd be rendered effectively useless. I have a terrible sense of direction (but getting better!) (ish), I've never handled a weapon deadlier than a steak knife, and I don't know how to fix things. I bet you need to know how to fix things. And I wear contact lenses. People with contact lenses are going to be screwed. I need to learn some survival skills - 12/21/12 is just around the corner!

On the other hand, I'm okay at Boggle! *waggles eyebrows*
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You're totally on my team. Tell me you like UpWords as well and we can conquer the world.
 
Serious question: are there any LDS litsters? I remember that the Mormon families I was friends with growing up all had to keep big stores of non-perishable foods, and I think it was in case of the rapture. Is that true?
 
WingedKiss said:
You're totally on my team. Tell me you like UpWords as well and we can conquer the world.
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Love it! Yay - best rapture ever!!!

Thank you for having faith in me! I'll loot a Costco for us or something.
 
Phelia said:
Zombie apocalypse, rapture, super belated Y2k meltdown are all situations in which I'd be rendered effectively useless. I have a terrible sense of direction (but getting better!) (ish), I've never handled a weapon deadlier than a steak knife, and I don't know how to fix things. I bet you need to know how to fix things. And I wear contact lenses. People with contact lenses are going to be screwed. I need to learn some survival skills - 12/21/12 is just around the corner!

On the other hand, I'm okay at Boggle! *waggles eyebrows*
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all skillsets are transferable after the rapture. or you could always do some shrewd bartering.

WingedKiss said:
You're totally on my team. Tell me you like UpWords as well and we can conquer the world.
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ladies, ladies... *sigh* if you don't learn humility pretty damned smart then you'll be left worldless. which must = no conkers. :(
 
whatever happened to the rainbow covenant anyway? i thought that was god's way of saying he wasn't going to kill us all again. did that just cover floods or what? i think it might be time to hire a lawyer to look over this shit and see if we should sue. seriously. just because it's god that doesn't he's allowed to just break a verbal contract on a whim.
 
killallhippies said:
whatever happened to the rainbow covenant anyway? i thought that was god's way of saying he wasn't going to kill us all again. did that just cover floods or what? i think it might be time to hire a lawyer to look over this shit and see if we should sue. seriously. just because it's god that doesn't he's allowed to just break a verbal contract on a whim.
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He is not going to kill us with the rapture we are either going to go be with him - or not.
 
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