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Are you my next Sugar Mama?

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IhateClowns

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Feb 7, 2010
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I am in desperate need of a sugar mama. I had one before. My beloved Mildred. She was the kindest most caring individual. I would rub her bunions and massage in Ben Gay daily for her. In turn she paid my bills and gave me spending money to buy fancy things.

At first she would only give me a shiney quarter until I told her a quarter can't buy shit and to just give me her checkbook. Once that happened the sky was the limit. Sure I had to do some shameless stuff, but I would do anything for my sugar mama and I did.

I pounded her pussy hard. I went down on her and would lick her asshole for hours because that is what she liked. Sure I had to learn how to take the depends off, but I got to be so good at it I eventually would just pull her diaper to the side.

By the way did I mention Mildred is a cunt whore slut bag? She left me for a 25 year old. It stung deeply. Not only did I reek of Ben Gay and Banaca but of shame as well.

So are you the next Mildred in my life? I will be taking applications
 
Just in case you were wondering what you have to live up to. Here is Mildred and her application:



This was her application:

Name: MIldred "Fuck Me hard" Snuggins

Address: Beverly Hills CA

Phone: 867-5309

SSN# 000-00-0001 I am the very first with a SSN

Blood Type: A+

Height:was 5'2" now 5' I am shrinking as I get older Weigh: 92lbs

Tit Size: Let me un-tuck them from my garter 34 longs and they are real

Garden Grooming Style: I have tomatos and cucumbers planted. Not sure what this has to do with a sugar mama

Ethnicity: White but I am down with the brown

Hair Color: Silver Eye Color: Cataract Blue with a hint of glaucoma

Annual Income: I don't work anymore but my husband God rest his soul was in oil. I am worth millions. Hope that is enough.

Square Footage of you house: 9405. That doesn't inclue the 7 car garage

Square Footage of the house you will buy me: Depends on how you lick my pussy. Isnt that was you boys call a Vagina now a days.

How much cash in your purse right now: $1214

Employer: You if you hire me

What type of car do you drive: I don't drive I have a driver drive me

Do you own any fur coats: I have a closet dedicated to them

Is your favorite movie Cocktail: Never seen it. I like Citizen Kane

Dogs or cats: Neither unless you mean Vaginas, I mean pussy

Does size matter: Honey i lost feeling 10 years ago so size doesn't mean anything to me

Are your friends hot: No they are all dead

Do I have to be seen with you on a regular basis: Only when I need you to fuck my ass. I havent had ass sex since 66'

How are you willing to pay me Monthly or weekly: Daily if you please me

Do you believe in Santa Claus: Yes if you he stuff my stocking with you

If I got into a bad accident and was paralyzed would you still send me checks: Yes because I will just have you lay there and I can do what I want.

Are you currently employed as a sugar mama: No I have only had one sex partner

Are you a squirter: I havent been wet down there since thee Reagan Administration.

Is your pussy tight: When the wind blows really hard it whistles. What does that tell you?

Does the back of your neck look like a package of hot dogs: My whole body looks like a package of hotdogs

Is your ass so big you have to wipe it by reaching over your shoulder: I cant wipe my won ass anymore. I just change my diaper and use the shower head

Are you a waxer: I dont need to. The hair fell out 10 years ago

Are your nipples sensitive: yes but only because my waist band has rubbed them raw

Is your ass an exit only: No I want my asshole fucked till it bleeds

Do you believe in 3-somes: No because I am not sure I can handle a 2 some

Are you a smoker: Just your penis honey


This are specific questions obviously. Please in your own words describe what makes you the perfect sugar mama and why I should choose you to take your money and spend it on myself while mediocrely pleasing you sexually: I have a large amount o money that my kids want. They just don't come around anymore and are waiting for me to die so they can get their hands on it. Fuck them I wan to give it to someone who deserves it. I havent been touched since Edgar passed. I tried to use a toy once and broke a rib when the vibrator rubbed against it. My bones are fragile so you will have to be extra carefull with me. When I pass I want to die while your penis is inside me.
 
IhateClowns said:
I am in desperate need of a sugar mama. I had one before. My beloved Mildred. She was the kindest most caring individual. I would rub her bunions and massage in Ben Gay daily for her. In turn she paid my bills and gave me spending money to buy fancy things.

At first she would only give me a shiney quarter until I told her a quarter can't buy shit and to just give me her checkbook. Once that happened the sky was the limit. Sure I had to do some shameless stuff, but I would do anything for my sugar mama and I did.

I pounded her pussy hard. I went down on her and would lick her asshole for hours because that is what she liked. Sure I had to learn how to take the depends off, but I got to be so good at it I eventually would just pull her diaper to the side.

By the way did I mention Mildred is a cunt whore slut bag? She left me for a 25 year old. It stung deeply. Not only did I reek of Ben Gay and Banaca but of shame as well.

So are you the next Mildred in my life? I will be taking applications
Click to expand...

I think I am too young. LOL :D
 
Sorry, i don't carry over $20 in my purse.... I think you wouldn't feel spoiled enough. :eek:
 
She lived in a beautful home with many other men and women. It was awesome to live there with her because there was plenty of jello and nurses in her house. They had quite a set up.

Her favorte activety was playing Wii bowling with her friends. That is me holding the camera.



I loved her with my whole wallet. Please will someone allow me to love them as much as I loved her?
 
Here is who she left me for:



Yeah that is right. Rico Suave. That sexy Mexican stole my Mildred. Him and his hot 1 hit wonder video can suck my dick. I need an ab roller. I need a sugar mama to buy me a fucking ab roller!!!
 
This was Mildred and my first date.



I thought she said I like horses. I found out after she broke her hip from falling off of the horse that she asked are you hung like a horse. Maybe I should have borrowed her Beltones.
 
INeedLove said:
I don't think the oompa loompas would appreciate me getting a second job. They are such needy bastards.
Click to expand...

So you are already a sugar mama? Nice. Can you go out and recruit one for me?

I can't imagine I will find one as sexy and attractive as Mildred, but as long as she is loaded I can have wallet goggles for just about any woman.
 
Here is the definition of a sugar mama

A woman (often an older woman) who holds her man/woman in nice standing with money, food, an apartment, etc. -- not always used in a derogatory fashion, or merely in exchange for sex, but because she can.

I use the word Sugar Mama in an endearing fashion. Like "Hey Sugar Mama give me a $100 my cell phone bill is 2 months late."

I respect sugar mamas and all that they stand for.
 
I know Mildred was sexy as hell, but her feet left something to be desired but I loved her bank account so much I dealt with her minor flaws.

Here are her feet.



She loved them to be rubbed with benedryl cream and then i would suck on them for hours. Only take breaks to couch up hair balls. Through the tears of the dry hacking I think she could see the love for her in my eyes.
 
So now that you know what you are up against please step right up and tell me why you want to be my next sugar mama.

I know there are so many hot horny rich women who want to give me their cash for sex, rub downs, and diaper changes. I am your guy. I want to be there for you.
 
I was asked to tell a little about myself.

So I have large hands. I am 6'5 so I can pick you up and put you to bed each night.

I have a 3.5 inch cock but it is as thick as a can of Pepsi. This benfits you because I can just grab your pussy lips and place them directly over my cock. This way there is no chance of me causing your osteoporosis to set in.

I am really good about separating pills from one another and I make a mean toast. I will always make sure to put a glass of water on your nightstand so you have a place to put your teeth as well.

I also know how to play bridge and backgammon. I love arts and crafts and I especialy love bingo. So please let me be your dobber in your personal bingo game..
 
I am an intellectual. I have a broad knowledge of many topics. I loved to read books to my sugar mama. Here is one I was in the middle of with Mildred

 
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I also went to ITT Tech and got my Masters in will writing. I am a notary republic as well. So whenever you are ready to change a few things on your just let me know.

 
*Sigh*

I know I have talked a lot about Mildred and sure her crystal blue cataract eyes are hard to turn away from, but I have moved on. I have given back her rose and am ready to love another woman's purse.

My heart is open and pure. My conditions are simple. Have a lot of money and don't have a penis. Other then that anyone is welcome to ask me to be their personal groomer.
 
Hmmm, too bad- I already have a 34 year old, and I'm not even 60 myself. But I'll put you on my waiting list - I'm sure when I age a bit more, I'll be needing to exchange him for a younger model.
 
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