Are You Afraid Of Your Computer?

[R Nitelight]

I sure am.


My computer's a great big powerful beastie, and I guess I use about a quarter of the things on it.

This thought hit me when I read Sparky's morning thread. He was having a problem doing something, and people were offering helpful advice. You can get a lot of helpful computer advice.

The thing is, whenever I start to read any helpful computer advice, and it starts getting the slightest bit technical, I find myself getting this silly grin on my face as my eyes start to glaze over. I read, but nothing seems to penetrate. I nod, and I vow to use this exciting new information, but at the first sign of trouble, I stop and shut it down, never to return.

Now excuse me. I'm going to go play solitaire with my 64 Bit GeForce II Graphic Accelerator Card.

 

[Ambrosious]

64 Bit GeForce II Graphic Accelerator Card

Ok, to get the most out of a good solitaire game with the 64 Bit GeForce II Graphic Accelerator Card, you will need to do a couple of things, just to tweak it. You can find most of your questions answered in the confusing manual, section 12, paragraph C, subsection 12-b titled "Confused?" , or you can call 1-800-IMA-GEEK, where one of the operators will be happy to confuse you.

 

[Ksss]

ROFLMAO..I can do the technical things, I can't figure out the easy things...

 

[Shylady]

lol I am terrified of my computer.

Right now it is doing something I can't even explain, much less try to fix.

 

[Ambrosious]

Shylady

Stop feeding it tootsie roll pops and it should be just fine.

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

I'm affraid of any "thing".....

That does not think as I do. The more "the thing" deviates from my way of thinking - the more terrified of it I become.

Computers are anti-Sparky in a sinister, polar fashion - thus, I fear "them" the most.

And as for those who "understand" computers - I would, if I had my way.......

terminate all of you.

 

[FlamingoBlue]

You can't possibly be afraid....

Not with over 3900 posts. Imagine what you happen if you got over your fear? You would be the 10000 post Lit BB poster boy.

blue

 

[R Nitelight]

FlamingoBlue

It's all point and click.

Point and click I can do.

 

[Ambrosious]

I feel smart...

I can point and click, and click and point too.

 

[KillerMuffin]

No, I'm not afraid of my computer. I had the joy of having access to a variety of different computers that belonged to the Department of the Army and the mission to remove ethernet cards. While doing so, I toodled through the puters themselves.

I wouldn't reccommend taking yours apart, however. You'd have to figure out how to put it back together.

I also gave my computer a nice, non-threatening, warm fuzzy evoking name. Charmlemagne. You know, the guy who whacked off the heads of 5,000ish people with an axe that was never sharpened simply because they refused to become christians? Didn't the pope saint him... I never remember these things.

 

[R Nitelight]

Ambrosious

It was hard in the beginning. I was pointing and clicking, but nothing was happening.
Then I started using the mouse.

 

[Shylady]

you mean puters dont like tootsie pops? see you learn somthing new everyday

 

[Friendly Dragon]

Well currently, my computer makes a beeping noise and reports an error every time I start it up. Haven't a clue what it means, and it doesn't seem to make any difference.

Also, my device manager is, to quote Scotty from Star Trek, lit up like a christmas tree with 14 (count 'em!) little exclamation marks which denote hardware conflicts. Basically I seem to have two of most drivers installed for some reason. Again, haven't a clue how to fix it, as every time I delete the extra ones it just automatically reinstalls them. Doesn't seem to actually cause any problems either though.

So my policy tends to be if my computer doesn't bother me, I won't bother it.

 

[Myrrdin]

Are You Afraid Of Your Computer?

Well I am very worried about my keyboard.
I mean, what's that top row of buttons for? All those extra F keys!
I've already got a perfectly good F key right in the middle of my keyboard. It supplies all the F's I need. Why do I need 12 more F keys?

Is there some sinister plot to take the English alphabet up to 38 letters by including an extra 12 F's?

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

I too can.....

Poke and flick my nose and my buttocks.....

Oh.... you said, point and click.

Never mind!

 

[Gavin the juggling monkey]

to get the most out of your 64 bit geforce 2 you must of first broke it in half, as the chip runs on a 256 bit bus and the memory on a 128bit bus.
It may have 64 megs of onboard ddr ram.
ho hum i learnt that while working with NASA, they called me in to talk down the last space shuttle after the waffle iron they had on board blew the fuse box.
You know what astronauts are like for waffles!!!

 

[Purple Haze]

This is your brain on Windows

http://helmigj.freeyellow.com/badall1.gif

My life has gotten so much better since I switched to MacIntosh.

Funny thing though, Bill Gates still finds ways of fucking with me.

 

[Bonnie Wee Lassie]

Wow that video is so me but I don't look like the man.

My computer scares the crap out of me somedays. I find new things that it can do everyday. Like I had no idea that it could talk to me. And it does, I tell you it does.

 

[teresafannin]

I only use about 1/3 of what my computer does. I am trying to learn this stuff, especially since I have a web cam & a new digital camera & a scanner. My sweetie bought me a book on web page design, it is huge & I have no idea where to begin. Between the two of us, we have a PC, an iMac & a Power Mac. This isn't including the 4 boxes of assorted computer parts he has in his garage. What the heck does bytes, megabytes & all that stuff mean anyway?????

 

[fgarvb1]

i have a great liltle gdc unit {gdc=god damned computor}
from gateway..when i screw it up i use goback to back up my
hard drive to before i screwed it up. when something gives up the ghost..i call gateway and they send me another one
and pay shipping.!!

hell i even installed a rewritable drive..and it worked the first time.! i am impressed with myself because electronics hate me.

at work i have gone thru one hard drive and had to reinstall windows a couple of timies it about 1-1/2 years

 

[Pepin]

Not afraid... I love messing around with it... I only use about 1/4 of its capabilities...

Pepin

 

[Pepin]

***GASP***
My signature is gone..

::looking everywhere::

 

[Pepin]

whew its back

 

[Weird Harold]

My sweetie bought me a book on web page design, it is huge & I have no idea where to begin.

If it's a well written tutorial, page one is usually the best place. If it's a reference guide, then you need "web pages fro Dummies" (or whatever the Dummies volume dealing with webpage design is called) to give you enough of the basics to know what youneed to look up.

What the heck does bytes, megabytes & all that stuff mean anyway?????

Think of a "byte" as one character. Mega is a prefix meaning "million" so a Megabyte is one million characters.

That's the simplistic version. If you seriously want to know more, E-mail me.

 

[Adoratrice]

Re: Are You Afraid Of Your Computer?

Well I am very worried about my keyboard.
I mean, what's that top row of buttons for? All those extra F keys!
I've already got a perfectly good F key right in the middle of my keyboard. It supplies all the F's I need. Why do I need 12 more F keys?

Is there some sinister plot to take the English alphabet up to 38 letters by including an extra 12 F's?

ummm Those would be mine....your friendly local bank teller...trust me ...you don't even want to know what is behind them.