Are we always such assholes?

[logophile]

First, a confession. Our Canadian friend Tolyk has wooed me over the course of the last 6 weeks or so. He is sweet and kind, romantic and funny, and sexy as hell.

This weekend he was coming from Canada to America to visit me for the first time. We have spent countless hours on the phone and the computer and we both felt like we had gone about as far as we could go without a face to face meeting. So a bus ticket was purchased and he packed his bags to head for my place. He left home at 8:00 yesterday (Friday morning) and was to arrive here at 9:30 this morning (Saturday).

Last night, just before midnight I got a call from him saying that the US border guard had refused him entry into the US. His questioning period had clearly felt more like an interrogation to him (Guard: How long are you going to be there? Tol: 3 days. Guard: So you're going to be there 2 weeks? Tol: No sir, I'm going to be there 3 days.) and they told him they didn't believe him. They also said he didn't have enough money for his intended length of stay and that was one "official" reason he was denied entry.

I don't have a lot of details about what happened because he was standing out in the cold at a pay phone to call me. I just feel so ashamed about this. I love my country (I'm a raving patriot) but this is embarassing. They wouldn't let him stay at customs and the bus station was closed for the night so he didn't have anywhere to go until he could catch the next bus this afternoon at 1:40pm.

Has anyone else had this problem with our board guards? I know it's not easy to get in here now, but this is really crazy. Share your stories, and any secrets to gaining entry, if you have them.

Very sadly,
Logo

 

[Black Tulip]

Awwww, I feel so sorry for the both of you.

Wish I could give some clever tips.

*hugs*

 

[neonlyte]

Logophile

So sorry for you and Tolyk. Such expectation and excitement thwarted.

I can't offer anything but sympathy, hope it works out for the both of you.

Look upon it as some kind of test, resolution will be the sweeter.

neon



Sorry, posted this on 'Mood' by mistake. Bad moi

 

[logophile]

Awwww, I feel so sorry for the both of you.

Wish I could give some clever tips.

*hugs*

Thanks BT.
I'm sure I'll feel better in a few days. Just wish I knew where he was...

 

[Evil Alpaca]

Sorry to hear it logo. I knew how much you were looking forward to that visit. So did he just get delayed? Is he still planning on coming?
I actually do love this country despite its faults, but wonder why we need to protect ourselves from those canadians? They did TRY to give us the sport of hockey . . . shouldn't they get some leniancy for that?

 

[carsonshepherd]

oh, no, baby. I'm so sorry that happened. Hope he's okay.

 

[logophile]

Sorry to hear it logo. I knew how much you were looking forward to that visit. So did he just get delayed? Is he still planning on coming?
I actually do love this country despite its faults, but wonder why we need to protect ourselves from those candadians? They did TRY to give us the sport of hockey . . . shouldn't they get some leniancy for that?

No, he was denied entry. He was taken from the border guard and dropped at the closed bus station (as near as I can tell, the officer I tried to speak to was exceedingly rude) and told that the next train back towards Toronto would leave today at 1:40 pm.

He was hurt and angry last night and said that he wasn't going to try to come to America again. So I guess he's not still planning on coming. That's part of why I'm trying to glean border crossing tips from others. If we could crack the code, I might be able to talk him into it. Maybe not though. He was treated very badly. I wouldn't blame him if he stuck to his guns about it.

 

[logophile]

Thanks Neon and Carson.

I can't believe how fucked up about this I am. The very fact that I'm posting about it means something. He's wanted to tell everyone about us for weeks and I kept asking him to wait until we met because I wanted to be sure. But the way my heart is breaking makes it obvious to me that there's *something* there. Hopefully we'll eventually have the chance to figure out what it is...

 

[Guest]

Oh, Logo, that's so sad. Love to both of you.

How fucking mad is that, though? You both must be fuming!!!

Loulou

 

[ElizabethWest]

Oh Logo! I am so sorry Sweetie. I know how much he was looking forward to this visit. I wish I could offer you comfort or advice but I am as pissed off about this as ya'll are. What a fucking shame. Let us know when you hear from him, I'm worried about him too.

Hugs and kisses,

 

[rgraham666]

Really sorry to hear about that logo. And to you too tolyk when you read this.

Nothing to offer that isn't snarkily sarcastic and that wouldn't be appropriate to this moment.

 

[neonlyte]

Thanks Neon and Carson.

I can't believe how fucked up about this I am. The very fact that I'm posting about it means something. He's wanted to tell everyone about us for weeks and I kept asking him to wait until we met because I wanted to be sure. But the way my heart is breaking makes it obvious to me that there's *something* there. Hopefully we'll eventually have the chance to figure out what it is...

How about you going to Canada? Are their entry conditions any easier?

 

[Mermaid]

Has anyone else had this problem with our board guards? I know it's not easy to get in here now, but this is really crazy. Share your stories, and any secrets to gaining entry, if you have them.

Very sadly,
Logo

\

Sorry Logo,

I hope you hear from him soon.

My first thought wat that Tolyk was hassled because of his dark look... he's got the dark hair and eyes, that make him a "profiling" question, unfortunately.

And secondly, it's the boarder guard's job to be an asshole. Especially when the security level is "elevated."

I had problems with re-entry from Canada, and I'm a CITIZEN. I'm 5"2', blonde-blue, I really do look like someone who wouldn't hurt a fly.

When was in Detroit, I took a day trip to my friend's house in Canada. On the way back, the next day, I was really hassled by the guards. I also didn't have a birth certificate, something that I didn't think one needed for Canada. I told him why I was in Detroit, and if I hadn't had proof of that right next to me, my whole car would have been searched.



I don't know why Tolyk couldn't have flashed a credit card or bank card and gone through. People don't travel with cash these days.

 

[dr_mabeuse]

"Land of the Free" has been an absolute joke here for years, even before 9/11. You can thump your chest all you want, but we're less free here than most of the industrialized world, and it's been that way for a long time. They keep us in line with slogans and propaganda, and we all wave our flags and buy it.

Just because we can vote and call Bush a jerk, we act like we're God's gift to liberty. The fact is that in the freedoms that really matter - the right to be free of plutocratic control, for example - we're becoming a third word country. You're free here in direct proportion to the $$$ in your pocket, and if you don't have the money, well then fuck you.

I'm very sad to hear what happened to Tolyk, and embarrassed too, but not surprised. We really are just steps away here from a total police state and that's not paranoia. People need to wake up and have a good look around them. We don't even know what freedom means anymore.

People look at me like I'm crazy when I talk about leaving the USA, but life here just seems to get more and more restrictive and unpleasant, and most citizens seems to like it that way. We're slaves to our jobs and slaves to our government. "Land of the Free" indeed.

---dr.M.

 

[cloudy]

How about you going to Canada? Are their entry conditions any easier?

You know, Logo, Neon has a point, if that's at all possible for you to go there instead.

I was in a very long relationship with a guy just outside of Toronto, and I never had any problems whatsoever going in to Canada, or coming back here. It's not required that you have a passport, but I would recommend it, because they would rather see that as identification.

I wonder, though, if flying would have made it easier. I flew every time I went (it's just way too far from here to drive - actually cheaper to fly), and although I still had to go through customs, it was mostly a matter of turning in the paperwork that they'd handed out on the plane, a cursory look at my passport, and then "enjoy your stay."

I feel horrible for both of you.

 

[logophile]

Thanks Lou! It is mad. I just can't believe it. He told me that it was hard to get across the border but we thought we had it all sewn up this time.

BethieWest - Thanks for being angry with us. Misery really does love company and I'm glad to have such a good companion.

Rob - Feel free to be cuttingly sarcastic. I'm trying to change my mood from soul-crushing loneliness and disappointment to anger. Anger is more productive. Fuel my fire!

Neon - I'm going to try to get there and soon. But having three kids and being an on-call midwife makes it pretty hard to do. There is one weekend in April that might work out schedule-wise if I can find appropriate childcare.

Mermaid - Thanks for your commiseration as well. I'm pretty sure he doesn't have a credit card. Neither do I, actually, but if I'm going to go to Canada, I think I'll get one just in case. Sorry to hear that you got hassled on your last trip as well. This just sucks!

Dr M. - I agree with you. I'm terrified of what's happening in our country right now. I'm not a conspiracy theorist, but I have a lot of ideas about what's happened and what's going to continue happening. Whenever I try to share them with anyone though I get a look that tells me that I've grown a second head. Whatever. I'm smart. I know what I'm seeing. Thanks for your kind words.

Maybe pancakes would help.

 

[Boota]

My sister-in-law is from Canada and she has to be sneaky to cross the border nearly every time she visits home because she won't file the proper paperwork to be allowed to cross. I have no idea why she don't, for a few hundred dollars her and my brother could cross anytime they want with no problem. Instead, it's always a chore. About a year ago they caught her at the border and made her turn around and go back. She was stuck living with her mother for two months and then they decided just to try it again and they got right through. So, I guess it depends on what border guard you run into and how his daily life has went up to that point.

Last time I went to Canada, I was allowed in, but I got our car searched because I'm from Indiana. The Canadian border guard didn't believe I didn't have a gun because, "Everyone from Indiana has a gun. Don't lie to me!" It probably didn't help that my niece volunteered, "That's my Uncle Boota. He only looks like he kills people, but he's really nice." The Canadian border guards were rude as hell to me and my family, but I really needed to get in, so I kept it cool. My first instinct when faced with people like that is to kick their fucking asses, and I could have easily because they were a bunch of pussies, but I didn't. If I'd been by myself I probably would have, but my parents and my niece had to get up to the wedding we were going to. (That is one of the first times I ever exerted self-sontrol when it came to not beating someone up. LOL.)

Sorry to hear about what happened. That really sucks.

 

[logophile]

My sister-in-law is from Canada and she has to be sneaky to cross the border nearly every time she visits home because she won't file the proper paperwork to be allowed to cross. I have no idea why she don't, for a few hundred dollars her and my brother could cross anytime they want with no problem. Instead, it's always a chore. About a year ago they caught her at the border and made her turn around and go back. She was stuck living with her mother for two months and then they decided just to try it again and they got right through. So, I guess it depends on what border guard you run into and how his daily life has went up to that point.

Thanks Boota. Do you know anymore about this paperwork? I'm clueless when it comes to this stuff, but now trying to learn as much as possible. Congrats on the self-restraint, by the way.

Cloudy - I don't have a passport, but I'll get one if we decide I should go up there. You also mentioned a birth certificate. Is there anything else you need to get from America to Canada?

 

[carsonshepherd]

Maybe pancakes would help.

*hands you a plate of french toast stuffed w/cream cheese and homemade peach jam*

 

[Black Tulip]

Holy shit. You guys have it really tough.

I can go nearly anywhere in Europe without extensive paperwork.
This sucks major.

 

[logophile]

*hands you a plate of french toast stuffed w/cream cheese and homemade peach jam*

Still trying not to cry...

 

[cloudy]

Thanks Boota. Do you know anymore about this paperwork? I'm clueless when it comes to this stuff, but now trying to learn as much as possible. Congrats on the self-restraint, by the way.

Cloudy - I don't have a passport, but I'll get one if we decide I should go up there. You also mentioned a birth certificate. Is there anything else you need to get from America to Canada?

If you get a passport, that's all you'll need, simply because you have to show so much documentation to get one. Also, apply for it well ahead of the time you'll need it, because it may take about 6 weeks to get to you. I think I got mine about a month after I had applied for it.

 

[carsonshepherd]

Still trying not to cry...

go ahead and cry, love. It'll make you feel better.

 

[Poussin]

.....

 

[davidwatts]

Sorry about all that.

I got treated pretty rudely by the Canadian border folk myself a while ago. I think that because we get along well, and the extent of the largely undefended border, sometimes we forget that we are different countries.

Cloudy's passport suggestion is a good one, as that does seem to cut down on problems.