Are LIT Friends real friends?

[hotoldrguy]

So I hope this is not just a yes or no answer thread. Friendship is something unique between people. It may mean something different to different people.

Can you truly be friends with someone you only know on LIT. Maybe to write back and forth about each others lives regularly, maybe you share confidences or ask advice of each other.

So can that be a real friendship or must someone be physically available to you to be a friend?

 

[done_got_old]

So I hope this is not just a yes or no answer thread. Friendship is something unique between people. It may mean something different to different people.

Can you truly be friends with someone you only know on LIT. Maybe to write back and forth about each others lives regularly, maybe you share confidences or ask advice of each other.

So can that be a real friendship or must someone be physically available to you to be a friend?

Yes, it's possible. I've remained connected with people who no longer post on Lit.

 

[beachbaby179]

Absolutely. Without question. As I said to someone not too long ago, "Lit may have to be our dirty little secret, but the friends we make here don't have to be." We're a bunch of like minded folks who understand that aspect of one another before we even meet. And if you think about it, how many of your "real" friends do you see often? You probably keep in contact with more of them on social media than you do in person.

Just my two cents. But yes.

 

[Redlace90]

So I hope this is not just a yes or no answer thread. Friendship is something unique between people. It may mean something different to different people.

Can you truly be friends with someone you only know on LIT. Maybe to write back and forth about each others lives regularly, maybe you share confidences or ask advice of each other.

So can that be a real friendship or must someone be physically available to you to be a friend?

I think it's possible too. I have friends who live aboard and we still stay connected through social media. If you are willing to make a little effort, maintaining good friendships can be easily done.

 

[JerseyJade]

So I hope this is not just a yes or no answer thread. Friendship is something unique between people. It may mean something different to different people.

Can you truly be friends with someone you only know on LIT. Maybe to write back and forth about each others lives regularly, maybe you share confidences or ask advice of each other.

So can that be a real friendship or must someone be physically available to you to be a friend?

Yes, I consider a few people on here to be my "real" friends. They are the people who have touched my heart and with whom I trust. They know more about me than anyone else on here and I'm pretty sure I can say the same about them. These people actually do care about me as much as I care about them.

 

[Valuver]

So I hope this is not just a yes or no answer thread. Friendship is something unique between people. It may mean something different to different people.

Can you truly be friends with someone you only know on LIT. Maybe to write back and forth about each others lives regularly, maybe you share confidences or ask advice of each other.

So can that be a real friendship or must someone be physically available to you to be a friend?

Yes you can be friends with someone from lit. I’ve become friends with a great guy and it’s wonderful getting advice and a guys point of view. Whether it’s advice or just checking in. Friends like this has made lit worthwhile. And before anyone asks we’re strictly pen pals which is more than ok.

I don’t think a friend has to be physically available. Just as with a sexual or romantic connection, I think if you click, distance and means of communicating won’t matter.

 

[LikeableMe]

Yes, they definitely can be. Sorry to be the party pooper who makes it a yes or no question, but I will definitely elaborate when I am able!

 

[Shi_One81]

Some are, definitely without question

 

[SoulAssasin247]

Not everyone you are friendly with are real life friends, but those you share deep personal information with, care for and truly have each other's best interest at heart are real life friends



To answer the question, yes some are considered friends, but that title shouldn't be thrown around lightly

 

[Polranny]

Of course it's possible. I consider several Litsters to be platonic, good friends.

 

[AnnieLit]

why wouldn't it be possible? Lit is not that much different from any other online community be that a yahoo group for new moms or a facebook group for bird photographers. You read, you comment, you start recognising some names. You move to PMs, things get a bit more personal. On Lit you might get into flirting/sexting/dating or you might not, but even if you do, when this stage is over, of course you can stay friends. And if this happens... you have a friend that probably knows more about you than all your real friends combined. Including all your real boyfriends and husbands (or girlfriends and wifes).

 

[Jada59]

Of course!

 

[AlwaysFara]

Yes. This is the way it is now in the world, so why not Lit?
I’ve been friends for years with peeps on social media. Nerdy literary sites, professional sites and here. I try to meet these people to make it tangible, though.
Life is too short to be behind a computer and not to actually meet up.
I met my man here, and he’s cooking me dinner right now, so.

Then again, there are friends that I’ve been close to for years, sharing my shit, online or through voice. I think of them as friends I haven’t met YET.
Yeah.

 

[jeff_is_smiling]

Interesting question. I am the exception, I suppose, but I have had a lot of trouble making friends in lit. The cause is surely mine, but I find that most people I chat with are, "responders" to my messages and not "initiators." Since I am more secretive than most about myself, the vast majority of my conversations have nothing to do with me.

There ARE a very small number who I've stayed in contact with for a length of time, but most who spend much time chatting with me disappear after a few weeks at most. I am not into social media, so, again, the issue is me and not lit people.

I can see that many friendships (and more) have occurred thru lit. Just not much for me...

 

[JerseyJade]

Interesting question. I am the exception, I suppose, but I have had a lot of trouble making friends in lit. The cause is surely mine, but I find that most people I chat with are, "responders" to my messages and not "initiators." Since I am more secretive than most about myself, the vast majority of my conversations have nothing to do with me.

There ARE a very small number who I've stayed in contact with for a length of time, but most who spend much time chatting with me disappear after a few weeks at most. I am not into social media, so, again, the issue is me and not lit people.

I can see that many friendships (and more) have occurred thru lit. Just not much for me...

Well I like you, Jeff.

 

[Deacon_Voss]

Sadly, Lit's a tough place to make good solid friends these days. I have a handful (JJ's a sweet one )

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

So far, in my limited time here, yes. I have some pretty deep conversations here. I think th anonymity initially makes people more open / more quickly.

 

[JerseyJade]

Sadly, Lit's a tough place to make good solid friends these days. I have a handful (JJ's a sweet one )

 

[beachbaby179]

Sadly, Lit's a tough place to make good solid friends these days. I have a handful (JJ's a sweet one )

Well then it's a good thing you've been here since the stone age and made all your friends early on.

So far, in my limited time here, yes. I have some pretty deep conversations here. I think th anonymity initially makes people more open / more quickly.

True. As an introvert it's much easier for me to meet people online. The anonymity and being able to think about your words before you share them are things that really help me meet new people.

 

[Deacon_Voss]

Well then it's a good thing you've been here since the stone age and made all your friends early on.

Did you just call me a stoner? Oh wait, the stone age, I get it. That's when I met you, right? Back when our kids were little

 

[beachbaby179]

Did you just call me a stoner? Oh wait, the stone age, I get it. That's when I met you, right? Back when our kids were little

Yes. You screamed at them to get off your lawn, and I had no choice but to flash you.

 

[JerseyJade]

Yes. You screamed at them to get off your lawn, and I had no choice but to flash you.

Hey wait! He chased ME off his lawn, too!

 

[tnman03]

Yes you will make friends here who you will interact with off of Lit. I have less than a handful of friends who’ve since left Lit I’m still occasionally in contact with. I also have friends who are still active on lit.

Time and distance are the great disrupters of lifelong friendships so that’s as much a factor here as in real life.

That if you love someone or something then let them go phrase is worth remembering. Don’t try to cling too tightly.

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

Yes. You screamed at them to get off your lawn, and I had no choice but to flash you.

Im gonna scream at kids 24/7 until it gets this result.

 

[Deacon_Voss]

Hey wait! He chased ME off his lawn, too!

Well that's because you were naked. I was trying to give you a hankie to cover up with