appearance modification

[Sugar_Spice]

I have found ginormous hotness in this in the past, but it left a slightly bitter taste in my mouth, so I'm not sure where I'm at with it anymore. The relationship ended (slowly, painfully, bitterly lol), but a lot of the mod attitude stayed.

95% + of my wardrobe is skirts/dresses because "ladies don't wear pants".

I'm a redhead because he liked it - I refused to go as light as he wanted, and kept my current auburn because *I* like it.

I keep my hair long because I recognize it's easier to cut for a lover, than grow for a lover.

When in relationships, I send images/ask "permission" for lack of a better term, before buying my lingerie.

If a lover wants me in heels every day, I'll be in heels; if they suggest a goal weight for health, I'll work on that.

Etc etc.

Wow, CutieMouse- that sounds a lot to ‘give’ to a partner that you’ve not even met yet? –I take it that’s a s/d preference rather than something you feel a woman ‘should’ do?

I think your quote that "ladies don't wear pants" surprised me. I like skirts as much as the next person, but that seems way too universal/ assuming unless you meant it with irony?

Is that honestly the only reason that you keep your hair long? –It’s not that you just like it that way?

 

[satindesire]

Aww, it sounds like you've a lot of people relying on you!

That's a very giving intention to adopt- what made you consider that rather than having a second of your own?

My first pregnancy was...traumatic. Really hard. I had hyperemesis gravidarum throughout my entire pregnancy, throwing up about 5-15 times a day, daily...and severe pain due to symphysis pubis dysfunction which made my daily life nearly unlivable. I have a split-level two-story house, with our bedroom and bathroom on the top floor, and the laundry room and garage on the bottom. So, I was going up and down two flights of stairs multiple times a day. When you can barely walk without bawling...well, stairs are nearly out of the question.

I didn't relish the thought of possibly going through that again, or worse, the next pregnancy. We thought it would just be easier on my body to adopt rather than put me through that again.

What made you want a boy, specifically? I often assume (I've been proved wrong many a time in this!) -that women want to have girls, and men want to have boys! -Or was it more that you wanted one of each?

We wanted to have a boy first, the whole American Dream ideal of the first-born son. Also, we both wanted a son so that we could carry on my husband's last name.

 

[Sugar_Spice]

My first pregnancy was...traumatic. Really hard. I had hyperemesis gravidarum throughout my entire pregnancy, throwing up about 5-15 times a day, daily...and severe pain due to symphysis pubis dysfunction which made my daily life nearly unlivable. I have a split-level two-story house, with our bedroom and bathroom on the top floor, and the laundry room and garage on the bottom. So, I was going up and down two flights of stairs multiple times a day. When you can barely walk without bawling...well, stairs are nearly out of the question.

I didn't relish the thought of possibly going through that again, or worse, the next pregnancy. We thought it would just be easier on my body to adopt rather than put me through that again.



We wanted to have a boy first, the whole American Dream ideal of the first-born son. Also, we both wanted a son so that we could carry on my husband's last name.

Oh, you poor love! That sounds incredible painful to endure. It always amazes and continues to impress me all the efforts that my mum went through to have and protect my sister and I. It must feel worthy reward to know that your daughter will appreciate all that you went through for her for forever and a day.

(Also- it’s a wonder that you didn’t just give up washing altogether during those months!! : )

Walking up and down stairs without risking losing your lunch much feel such a luxury nowadays! –Bet you’ll never take that for granted again!

I’m from the UK, and I guess I’ve never really had the American drilled into me. My partner would (if ever to have a child) way prefer a boy, just as kids’ toys for boys are far more fun (agreed!) –but I’d just love a girl so I could enjoy pretty and cute things with her and tie ribbons in her hair… without any risks of macho bravado! (Again- if I were ever to have a child)

It’s curious about being keen to carry his name forwards. It’s not something that I’ve ever worried about (my mum was very keen on family tree-ing, but my dad never was anyway!) My sister made a point of not taking on her husband's name when they married, simply for the sake of independence.

 

[Homburg]

I have found ginormous hotness in this in the past, but it left a slightly bitter taste in my mouth, so I'm not sure where I'm at with it anymore. The relationship ended (slowly, painfully, bitterly lol), but a lot of the mod attitude stayed.

So I went to restaurant and had bangers and mash. Man, bangers and mash is good stuff. But, hey, this restaurant served me some baaaad bangers and mash. I can either swear off bangers and mash, or go to another restaurant for it.

*shrug*

That said, I can see how an activity could retain a given colour after as intense a relationship, especially as it was such a fixed thing.

--

I think your quote that "ladies don't wear pants" surprised me. I like skirts as much as the next person, but that seems way too universal/ assuming unless you meant it with irony?

It was, I believe, a quote from said previous relationship. Thus the quotes, not just a blanket statement.

 

[CutieMouse]

Wow, CutieMouse- that sounds a lot to ‘give’ to a partner that you’ve not even met yet? –I take it that’s a s/d preference rather than something you feel a woman ‘should’ do?

I think your quote that "ladies don't wear pants" surprised me. I like skirts as much as the next person, but that seems way too universal/ assuming unless you meant it with irony?

Is that honestly the only reason that you keep your hair long? –It’s not that you just like it that way?

Um... I removed jeans/slacks from my wardrobe, because my lover *at that time* believed "ladies don't wear pants". I've lived wearing skirts/dresses 95+ percent of the time for several years now (regardless of his opinion), and am comfortable in them; I see no reason to go out and buy an entire new wardrobe because a relationship ended.

I am a very feminine woman. I never leave the house without lipstick, I sell lingerie for a living, I'm on my feet all day and still do heels 3+ days a week *by choice*. My avatar proves I do own *a* pair of jeans; although on my days off you're more likely to find me in overalls and a tank... okay so probably more likely a linen skirt and a tank. LOL

Changing my hair from medium brown w/ natural light auburn highlights to light auburn was no biggie, and a no brainer. Like I said - I kept it after the relationship ended because *I* like it this way.

And yes, my *primary* reason for keeping my hair long (mid-back length) is because it is easier to cut than grow. I keep it in a French twist almost all the time; I pretty much only wear my hair down for my lover [when I have one]. The addendum to that is that I happen to love the feeling of a fist wrapped up in my hair, which is harder to do when it's short. I also have very classic features (similar to this image), which work well with long hair. So it isn't like the length of my hair is some ginormous act of martyrdom or something. It's hair. Wah.

My point here is that yes, I happily hand a hell of a lot of *me* over when I have a lover - IF that lover desires that sort of dynamic. It's just hair [clothes, shoes, whatever]. In the grand scheme of things, why on earth would I be so attached to any of that stuff (because it is just stuff), that I couldn't trust my lover with it? If I can't trust him with the little shit (should he desire), what on earth am I doing handing over the big stuff?

So I went to restaurant and had bangers and mash. Man, bangers and mash is good stuff. But, hey, this restaurant served me some baaaad bangers and mash. I can either swear off bangers and mash, or go to another restaurant for it.

*shrug*

That said, I can see how an activity could retain a given colour after as intense a relationship, especially as it was such a fixed thing.

It was, I believe, a quote from said previous relationship. Thus the quotes, not just a blanket statement.

Wise words, taken in the spirit meant.

Honestly the only thing that still pisses me off (okay one of several things LOL) is that I used to love tight-lacing, and that former lover created a lot of negative stress around it. I can totally see myself rocking out all sorts of mod-y stuff in the future, but the corsetry? Mmmmm... not so much. Seriously pisses me off; I really did enjoy it. Maybe if I get back into it on my own, on my own terms someday, it will change. Who knows.

 

[Homburg]

Wise words, taken in the spirit meant.

Honestly the only thing that still pisses me off (okay one of several things LOL) is that I used to love tight-lacing, and that former lover created a lot of negative stress around it. I can totally see myself rocking out all sorts of mod-y stuff in the future, but the corsetry? Mmmmm... not so much. Seriously pisses me off; I really did enjoy it. Maybe if I get back into it on my own, on my own terms someday, it will change. Who knows.

Corsetry, to a reasonable extent, is bloody interesting stuff. I'm juuuust paranoid enough about certain party's health issues to not look too closely into it. The only corsets around here are very much not of the serious cinching variety.

 

[CutieMouse]

Corsetry, to a reasonable extent, is bloody interesting stuff. I'm juuuust paranoid enough about certain party's health issues to not look too closely into it. The only corsets around here are very much not of the serious cinching variety.

Yup. The real stuff screws with one's blood gasses enough to technically qualify as a form of breath control [hothothot], but in reality it's not feasible 24/7 [necessary to evoke real body modification] due to my career. It's kinda sorta difficult to tell women to love their bodies *as is*, when one is laced down to an "unnatural" hourglass shape. LOL

 

[FloggingMolly]

I've worn my corset for full weekends (bar sleeping!) for roleplay events and as much as I enjoy the restriction, I'd hate it day in day out!

Of course, if he insisted...

 

[the captians wench]

Yup. The real stuff screws with one's blood gasses enough to technically qualify as a form of breath control [hothothot], but in reality it's not feasible 24/7 [necessary to evoke real body modification] due to my career. It's kinda sorta difficult to tell women to love their bodies *as is*, when one is laced down to an "unnatural" hourglass shape. LOL

I've worn my corset for full weekends (bar sleeping!) for roleplay events and as much as I enjoy the restriction, I'd hate it day in day out!

Of course, if he insisted...

If I didn't have a job where I have to bend, twist and lift so much I would wear a corset all day every day. I love the feel of it. I love how I look it in. And I love creating ones that fit my personality and mood.

But that's all my choice, of course I haven't had any complaints about said choice. *giggles*

 

[MiriamL]

A few months ago I was corresponding with a 19 year old girl who *wanted* to be in a submissive relationship with her own father. He had no knowledge of this whatsoever, and she wasnt about to tell him...but she would pretend it was real by acting on every little preference he expressed.

If he said something positive about a women's hairstyle on TV she would be wearing that exact hairstyle the next day...or a certain skirt which she modeled for him.

One time there was some disparaging remark about under arm hair, and so she went right out and had a complete laser job...everywhere!

She enjoyed the ritual of appearing before her father at bedtime...with a completely nude cunt under her thin nightgown!

 

[cathrynb]

.....

 

[chy_girl]

My Mistress likes to dress me up - or down, depending on the outfit. Sometimes it's semi-conservative, sometimes (i.e. most of the time) it's very... trampy. Even when she doesn't have a request I dress with her likes in mind even if it's just at underwear level. The dressing to please her I like because it's a way I can serve her and I like it when she chooses what I wear because I see it as one of her ways of caring about me. And there's something delightfully wicked about her murmuring the words "my trampy, little cum-slut" low and growly in my ear just before she bites my neck or demands I take said clothing off.

She's never made any other request along the physical (other than tasking daily exercise), but I doubt she'd be overly pleased if I arrived with my hair cut short enough that she couldn't grab a handful of hair or it was in very odd colors. Even if she doesn't give specific guidelines or directions, she's always a factor in decisions about my body. I like being able to serve her in that way, even if she doesn't always realize it's happening.

I'd love to take her mark though. Even if it isn't a LTR/SO kind of relationship, my permanent markings are all a reminder of some sort for me. I'd love to have her mark as a reminder of our time together. Of her being my first "leash holder," so to speak... Wish me luck on that one, though.

 

[rida]

I love to dress the way my men or even dates like.
Hubby has very little interest in managing my outfits but I still ask him what he prefers when we go out. The Sadist demands skirts (preferably short ones) and heels, so I dress appropriately. As I love to dress up, it is actually something I really enjoy doing.

But when it comes to how to keep my body, I'm in a bit of a quandary as Hubby wants my pubic hair as luscious as possible and the Sadist wants me bare. It is an ongoing struggle, while I try to please both men, as the compromising short trim leaves both of them un-happy ...

As for my head-hair, Hubby wishes I'd keep it shoulder length all year round, but as I have not found a stylist I like (honestly had no time to look for one either) where I live, I get my hair styled only once a year when I go back home for the summer. And after that they grow out.

From the above I think it is obvious that I do not do well with direct orders on how to keep my hair ... LOL